Chinese Women, Asian Women, Online Dating & Things Chinese and Asian
Thread

When does 'Old' become 'Too Old'?

From: China 山东(shan dong) 济宁(ji ning ) @paulfox1 Time : 2016-06-08 08:07:19

I have often said that age is only a number. But what is an acceptable age difference between a man and a woman?



I have always considered 15-18 years as a maximum, essentially to avoid the 'generation-gap' issue, but is it really important?



Girls, would you ever consider taking a western husband who is older than your own father?



Guys, would you ever consider taking a wife who is younger than your daughter?



I would love to hear your thoughts - and why.....


Comments to Thread
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From: Switzerland Bern - Berne Bern @kalzorch Time : 2016-06-08 19:06:12 #1
I consider about 15 years to be the maximum difference that I am comfortable with. All other things being equal (which they seldom are), the less difference the better. She could even be a few years older.
From: United States California San Diego @JoyFly Time : 2016-06-09 00:01:41 #2
@paulfox1

"I have always considered 15-18 years as a maximum, essentially to avoid the 'generation-gap' issue"

------Do you know how many teen-girls gave a birth of a child in the U.S.??? So '15-18 years' can be also considered as the 'generation-gap'.




"Girls, would you ever consider taking a western husband who is older than your own father?"

------Of course NOT => unless you are rich and you want to be a sugar-daddy. Money talks first!




"But what is an acceptable age difference between a man and a woman?"

------The best age-gap is within 10 years ==> that is, -5 ~ +5.

From: China 山东(shan dong) 济宁(ji ning ) @paulfox1 Time : 2016-06-09 14:29:31 #3
@kalzorch
Thank you for taking the time to reply. A little older? Haha. I became a grandfather at the ripe old age of 37. When a friend asked me what was the WORST thing about being a granddad, my reply was simply 'Having to sleep with a grandmother!'

@JoyFly

Again, thank you for your reply, but do you mind if I offer you some advice?

You said - "Do you know how many teen-girls gave a birth of a child in the U.S.???"

No I don't and nor do I care. I grew up in England where it was extremely common for a girl to have to ask their mother to look after little 'Mercedes' or 'Chardonnay', in order for them to concentrate on doing their maths homework!

You also said 'Of course NOT'

This phrase is usually used in English to precede something like 'Do you think I am stupid?' or 'How Dare You!' etc. Especially when written or spoken with the same conviction used by yourself.

You then went on to say - 'The best age-gap is within 10 years ==> that is, -5 ~ +5.'

Who says this is 'best'? Is it your personal opinion or is it a factual statistic that we should all know about?

Opinions are fine, just as long as we know they are opinions. I would hate you to be accused of arrogance!

Anonymous24687
@Anonymous24687 Time : 2016-06-09 14:31:08 #4
I know a couple who are thinking about getting married and the age difference is more than 35 years.
They both seem happy with their decision, so why should we judge them?
From: Switzerland Bern - Berne Bern @kalzorch Time : 2016-06-09 16:59:53 #5
A recent Swiss university study showed that those marriages are most successful where:

1) the man is at least 5 years older than the woman
2) the woman has a higher academic degree

The first condition makes sense to me because a younger woman typically has more of what a man wants most, and an older man typically has more of what a woman wants most.

Why the second one should be true is a mystery to me.

Note that this study was done in Europe; I can imagine the results might be different in Asia.
Anonymous24696
@Anonymous24696 Time : 2016-06-10 22:03:06 #6
JoyFly- so many teen pregnancies in USA? It is an epidemic worldwide with the mindset of todays teens it is want first needs second..until these kids take responsibility for their actions(not using birth control) it wont stop.

Age doesn't matter so much if their is deep love and understanding between two people, it doesn't matter if it is man older or the woman is older. You are so confident in your own stated opinion I must assume you are an expert in the filed of relationship age differences, what is "best" in this area.

I enjoy reading your one dimensional replies to blogs, very entertaining. 8)

Anonymous24697
@Anonymous24697 Time : 2016-06-10 22:10:42 #7
Paul I tend to agree that a 15 year or so age gap is maximum. Have a wife who is younger than my daughter? Depends on how old my daughter is when I finally find the "one". As to why a woman would have a husband older or as old as their father usually has to do with not having a father or needing that father figure also older men usually are more reliable and trustworthy.

I also think that it is difficult because of social pressure from society in general, the automatic assumption is female gold digger or male gold digger.

Paul-What are your thoughts about society and peer pressure affecting couples with big age gaps?

Cheers mate

Cheers
From: United Kingdom @good88person Time : 2016-06-11 09:46:51 #8
@JoyFly

JoyFly said ........
Do you know how many teen girls gave a birth of a child in the U.S.???
So '15-18 years' can be also considered as the 'generation gap'.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

American 15 year old UNMARRIED mothers are another "proud chapter" in American history.
Other "proud chapters" are killing MILLIONS of Native American ( Red Indians ) and Mexicans and stealing their land
..... and ..... capturing about 20 million Africans and making them into UNPAID SLAVES .....
and then ..... saying bad things about China investing BILLIONS to DEVELOP Africa !

If you do not believe me , please READ A HISTORY BOOK !

You live in San Diego ( Mexican Spanish for "Saint Didacus" ) ,
which was PART OF MEXICO ,
until Americas STOLE San Diego from the Mexicans and Native American ( Red Indians ) ,
because American had a better army , in the year 1850 !

Allowing for a 9 months gestation period ........
the 15 year old UNMARRED mother was probably having sex ,
when she was 14 years old ,
with an American phildophile.

The phildophile situation is so bad
that
an American man CANNOT say that ........
"he likes children"
because ........
many Americans will think that ........
"the American man like having sex with children".

There are so many bad stories about
American men , English men , etc
going to Brazil , Thailand , etc
to have sex with children.

---------------------------------------

Do American mothers SUPERVISE and DISCIPLINE their children ?

or ........

Do American children do
whatever they like
like ........
shoplifting , getting drunk , having sex and getting pregnant ?

--------------------------------------

Asian "Tiger moms" SUPERVISE and DISCIPLINE their Asian children
to do
3 hours of homework a day ........
so ........ many Asian children
become doctors , lawyers , engineers.

Mark Zuckerberg ( Billionaire owner of THE FaceBook (American version of Weibo ) )
Chinese wife is Priscilla Chan , who is an American medical doctor ,
who thought that
Mark Zuckerberg should take his University exams MORE SERIOUSLY
( when they were dating in University ) !

I think that
Mrs Priscilla Zuckerberg is going to be
a SCARY "Tiger mom" Ha ! Ha ! LOL ( Laugh Out Loud ) !

Asian "Tiger moms" are SCARY
but
children needs SUPERVISION and DISCIPLINE ........
or
they become UNMARRIED teenage mother at 15 !
From: China 山东(shan dong) 济宁(ji ning ) @paulfox1 Time : 2016-06-11 17:44:55 #9
@anonymous24697 and @good88person

I would like to address both of you and reply to your valued comments.

Firstly anon - you asked 'Paul-What are your thoughts about society and peer pressure affecting couples with big age gaps?'

My own personal thoughts are that it's nobody's damn business what 2 consenting adults get up to, but society as it is, will always judge.
Usually it's the older male with the much younger female. He is regarded as a 'dirty-old-man' and she is regarded as a 'gold-digger' - such is our somewhat inherent need to stereotype. You only need to walk the streets in the bigger towns and cities in Thailand to see fat, bald, aged men holding the hand of some 20-something chick. He's just a walking ATM to her and she's just his paid company - is what most people would think, and sadly, they are probably 99% correct. However, it's nobody's damned business but theirs.

good88person. Nicely written! I have this beautiful little story that I use when I find myself in real-life situations and this subject is brought up in conversation. I absolutely INSIST that you try it. It goes like this -

Wait for just the right moment and then say "Well I have a really good friend who had sex with a 12-year old girl once."

Then wait for the reaction and the comments. Let those baby's fly my friend. You'll be asked why on earth you have anything to do with this person, why he's not locked up in jail etc, along with comments about how filthy and disgusting it all is. Wait for them to finish their ranting and raving and when all is quiet, hit them with -

"He was 13 at the time!"

Watch their sad faces drop as they all try to eat their words and backtrack on what they all said a few moments earlier - it really is pure gold!

Incidentally, did you know that the legal age of consensual sex in China is 14? Yep, I know it's crazy but you are welcome to check it on Wiki if you like. That said, please don't think for one second that I would ever condone an adult male having sex with a 14 year old girl - but it's a fact.

The reason I mention it is simple. You certainly don't see any 15-year old mothers in China!

I rest my case M'lud.
From: United States California San Diego @JoyFly Time : 2016-06-11 22:01:08 #10
to op:

You are asking for "individual opinions" here...........rather that "expert advice"..............so I just simply gave my opinion => I knew that my honest words would irritate some old guys, I don't care, at least, I don't lie!



to good88person

Sorry, I don't understand what's your point. English (as 2nd language) is still confusing me sometimes...



to all who had questioned me:

Again, my opinion is individual, and I don't care you "like" or "dislike", probably most old guys disagree with me while most women & young guys agree with me.

About the "best" age-gap, I read some articles long time age......do your own research online, you may find more info.

Anonymous24712
@Anonymous24712 Time : 2016-06-11 23:32:29 #11
@good88person-

Men cannot say they like children in public mainly because they are targeted by the neofeminists firstly, by terrified emasculated men secondly, thirdly this is not a discussion about male and yes get ready.... female pedophiles.

No need to bring up history about Indians and negro slaves(which were not captured but sold by their chieftains for profit) Saudi Arabia purchased far more negro slaves than any other country in history and no one blinks an eyelash at this, they also had thousands of whites/asians as slaves. "read your history"

It's teen boys getting the teen girls pregnant not pedophiles!! The teen boys are not taught to keep it in their pants and the teen girls keep taking it out of the teen boys pants! It is "gansta mentality" that rules Americas youth today not common decency and respect. Factor that together with out of control drug use amongst teens in America all you end up with is a recipe for disaster which is unfolding daily in "everyday" America...

Why do you have so much anger towards USA?

Do you feel better now after getting your rant off your chest?

Are you a Chinese man by any chance? "good88person"

Cheers...

From: China 山东(shan dong) 济宁(ji ning ) @paulfox1 Time : 2016-06-12 18:54:03 #12
@JoyFly

Yes, I asked for opinions. However, your 'opinion' came across as being factual.

Also, which 'old-guys' are you referring to? You are 44 (according to your profile), so you are also not a 'spring chicken' either.

As for reading an article about what is 'best', you simply read another person's opinion.

I read an article that said McDonalds make the 'best' burgers, so I guess that must be true also, right?
From: China 辽宁(liao ning) 沈阳(shen yang ) @AchrisT Time : 2016-06-12 22:03:16 #13
Well I have always looked at it as age is a number. It makes no difference as long as the areas of interest are closely enjoyed. Would I date a woman younger then my children, well to back up what JoyFly was saying I was young to start a family. So most that I date are younger then my Daughter, and my sons also.

The difference between two people is how they are embraced, are they embarked on or embarrassed to want. This happens in all age groups. Culture is the primary determiner of what is to old and to young.

I have been told that the US Embassy uses a calculation of 1/2 the man's age plus 7 years. If she is younger, there will need to have a court to approve (nicely putting it), if she is older good to go.

Does age have a reason on not giving a chance of happiness. It falls with the two that have made their choice and not left to the thoughts of those that have approved or disapproved. Lasting marriage takes work, without outside influences making it difficult.

Have a great time experiencing life.
Anonymous24726
@Anonymous24726 Time : 2016-06-13 09:39:54 #14
I think it is disgusting when someone in 60s want to date only someone whose age range from 18-40. Men or women.

It is one thing when you meet someone who is much older or younger than you but find you two compatible on other pages while it is totally different to deliberately seek a 20+ year younger chick or duck.



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