Chinese Women, Asian Women, Online Dating & Things Chinese and Asian

One New Member Complains That CLM Focuses Too Much On Dating Safety!

From: China 浙江(zhe jiang) 杭州(hang zhou ) @JohnAbbot Time : 2011-04-26 01:05:16
We recently received a couple of letters from a member who had only joined for one day. He was very upset that our Chinese lady members were quite insistent that he have a video chat. Here are his letters with our one brief reply. I thought you all might have some good thoughts or opinions on whether maybe he's right and we should stop worrying so much about member safety. I can tell you one thing - it would sure cut down the workload behind the scenes.


Although I REALLY appreciate your efforts to stop scammers on your site, however.... I feel you have cultivated a sense of deep mistrust and changed the focus of your members thought process from finding someone they are interested in, to finding out weather or not someone is a scammer. I have talked to many women here in my short time, and I must tell you that the conversation ALWAYS revolves around "Are you real?" "Are you really where you say you are" and things of the like, and this goes on infinitum. In fact, I find it nearly impossible to carry on meaningful dialog, and I grow weary of the Fear, Uncertainty, and Doubt that plagues this site. I just got finished talking to a very nice young woman who asked me what time it was, when I told her, she says "It isn't 11 oclock in America, you are lying good bye" I also had one "hang up" on me because i don't have a webcam. I DON'T HAVE A WEBCAM BECAUSE I HAVE NO USE FOR ONE. I am sorry but I do not feel it is worth my effort to try and unravel all of this. I will just wait until I get to Guangzhou, and meet someone there. Thanks for your time.


We have your letters and will give them a lot of thought. We'll get back to you shortly.



You may have time to give this lots of thought, however I DO NOT!

I am dropping your site because YOU MISMANAGE IT.

YOU have cultivated a sense of mistrust among your members that is so deep and so wide that IT CANNOT BE BRIDGED.


I don't have time, and you don't know how.

So, in the immortal words of Fez...

I bid you good day sir!


CLM has not yet responded to the second letter because we want to consider your opinions first. We look forward to your comments.
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From: Canada Ontario Toronto @tanshui Time : 2011-04-27 07:50:00 #1

Hard to imagine that a man would have a problem with chatting on a webcam.

Number 2 seems a little irrational but obviously an acknowledgment is needed as part of good business etiquette. Of course the number 2 does bring to mind some other less polite words to use. LOL

Safety is important for many reasons for both men and women. As anyone who visits your Scammers Prison can see, predators lurk everywhere.

I think that any woman would be crazy if she didn't take steps to verify as much as possible who someone is before exchanging emails, etc. And why would a reasonable man object to talking on a webcam?

Whether on the web or on the street safety isn't about fear it is about simple common sense.

CLM has a great approach to safety John.
From: United States Virginia Stafford @fidelhappy Time : 2011-04-29 12:34:35 #2
I appreciate your safety efforts.
Safety is important for everyone.

There is no need for you to further contact him.

In the first letter he stated his intention to visit Guangzhou without getting to know anyone first.

The second letter he bid you good day.
From: United States @fivedollarbill Time : 2011-04-29 20:58:02 #3
My initial instinct from reading the CLM member's response is he has something to hide. Whether he is being deceitful or fearful is unknown. There is an issue and the issue is on his side. The safety measures CLM insists we follow are for every honest person's benefit. No one wants to be scammed. It is painful. I rather know up front than to find out thousand of dollars later the person who I am chatting with is not whom they say they are. Keep up the good work CLM.
From: United States California Walnut @doctorj Time : 2011-05-06 20:34:23 #4
uuuuuhhhhh.....let me get this straight.

this guy does not have the time to spend a pittiance on a web cam but he is willing to travel all the way to guongzhou and then HOPE to bump into somebody there?

so taking a few minutes to buy a webcam consumes "too much time" but making an international journey going on a speculative "fishing expedition" does not?

wow. the ladies here are REALLY missing out on a winner here, john.

apart from helping protect highly vulnerable chinese ladies, doesn't HE want to see something more than a photograph too?


From: Canada British Columbia Victoria @bmccull Time : 2011-05-07 09:45:06 #5
I am not sure that lack of webcam is sufficient reason to condemn the writer of Member Letter #1. I don't like webcams either and don't have one on my office computer. I do have one on my netbook and can use that if "verification" is needed.

I think that to some extent, CLM appeals to people who are worried about dating scams. New members shouldn't be too surprised that the features are put to use!
From: United States Massachusetts Boston @thedragonb1 Time : 2011-05-10 22:07:28 #6
Sorry, the guy screams scammer and my suspicions are on high alert. His abrupt attitude to hear a response from CLM makes me even more suspicious. What American guy rushes to condemn safety online knowing damn well that many men are being taken for hundreds of thousands (if not millions) of dollars. If he thinks he can just meet a woman in Guangzhou by just going there, good riddance to him.

Women in this day and age have reason to be ask questions and safe. Maybe some women are more quick to judge before taking time to find out the truth about this guy, but hey if you are real and she judges you too quickly, it's HER LOSS. Don't sweat it and keep moving forward.

The safety route is a two way street. Men should be concerned about it as well. There are plenty of African scammers in Guangzhou ready to take his ass for a ride if he's gullible enough. If this man is serious with meeting a woman across seas then a webcam is a great and wise investment. Jeeze the damn things go for $15-$20 on some websites. It's not so expensive.

It's not only for a woman's safety and peace of mind, but for a man's as well!
From: China 广东(guang dong) 广州(guang zhou ) @penny8789 Time : 2011-05-11 08:52:02 #7
try to talk
From: United States District of Columbia Washington @niceguyindc Time : 2011-05-19 21:54:57 #8
I agree with Thedragonb1 : scammer. Something definitely suspicious. Frankly one of the big selling points for your site is the added comfort level that there is such attention to making sure people are "real". Yes sometimes a webcam chat is inconvenient but hey, if it makes the lady more comfortable, and it makes me more comfortable, then it's time well spent IMHO. I vote keep it the way it is John.

From: Philippines Laguna Laguna @lonelylavander Time : 2011-06-25 00:00:44 #9
ouch i think hes very excited :) just kidding
From: China 广东(guang dong) 广州(guang zhou ) @Wittyname Time : 2011-07-15 20:34:03 #10
You guys need to get a life.

All you do all day is respond to every little thing that happens on this site.

On my planet, people chat with each other online.

Of course, how to explain this to someone who is in their 60s?

The internet age is here, and you are lost in it.

We are the next generation, we know scammers when we see them, you don't have to make a fake prison for them.

Get with the program.

Get a life.

I bet you guys spend at least two weeks commiserating with each other about what i have said here today.

Get a life!
From: China 广东(guang dong) 广州(guang zhou ) @Wittyname Time : 2011-07-15 21:22:45 #11
This message is for you, John Abbot.

Since your profile is hidden, I cannot send you a message directly so...

Here it is.

Get a life, you douche bag.

You have to post every ten minutes on everything you read.

Quit being a total faggot.
From: China 广东(guang dong) 广州(guang zhou ) @Wittyname Time : 2011-07-15 23:06:07 #12

Anybody who calls you out on your BS is a scammer?

Someone who calls you a queer and tells you to get a life you old man trying to convince a bunch of twenty year old women you are attractive, is a scammer?

How about a guy from the USA who says you are a total douche bag?

Scammer too?

From: China 广东(guang dong) 广州(guang zhou ) @Wittyname Time : 2011-07-16 09:45:01 #13
Oh, yeah, I am not a "Member" of anything here.

I signed on to use your service to get in touch with single women in my area.

All of you "Members" go ahead and continue to waste your life stroking each others egos and confirming each other thoughts by reaching correctness by consensus.

No matter if you all agree that you are smart and you know what is right and good?

You are still a bunch of sniveling bitches.
From: China 浙江(zhe jiang) 杭州(hang zhou ) @JohnAbbot Time : 2011-07-17 23:55:27 #14
Wittyname: you need to get back on your meds man! You are really losing it and there's no help for the issues you have in China. Lose the anger and take care of yourself.
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