Chinese Women, Asian Women, Online Dating & Things Chinese and Asian
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New to Chinese Dating - Need Help

From: United States Louisiana Metairie @SCBeets2200 Time : 2016-12-14 18:47:39

I'm having an issue with a user I tried to arrange a chat session with. I'm not experienced with dating in general or Chinese dating in specific and I'm having some anxiety and doubts as to this site's claims about how great Chinese women are for guys like me. Please note, I'm unemployed and broke, so I can't upgrade to a Gold account and I'm only able to chat or message users of this site having Gold accounts (the site lists them as being VIP members for reasons not well understood) and not Standard members. Please bear with me as I explain my situation.



I tried to chat with a user on this site a few days ago. Just moments prior to my starting the chat session, the girl I wanted to speak with was online. As soon as I clicked "Send" to begin my session, I got a message stating that she was no longer online and to send a private message to her inbox, instead. Well, I did that and I have not gotten a reply. Just the other day, after waiting for a reply, I log in and find no reply. So, I sent a second message asking why it seemed this other user was ignoring me. Upon logging in today/tonight, there is still no response from this user. I realize it has only been a few days, but I'm very unsure. I'm worried that the lady I tried to contact might be a scammer or a fake profile. It wouldn't totally surprise me if there are bots trolling this dating site, seems like all dating sites have them. But I positively HATE the thought that, once again, I'm on another dating site and my first attempt at scoring some kind of contact with the opposite sex ends up being a fail because the other side was just a bot! And it insults me to no end to be ignored by ANYONE, male or female (but especially female!) when I try to reach out to them! It kills the fun, desire and my belief in the existence of romance pretty quickly. So my questions are as follows:



1. Is it normal for women, Asian or otherwise, to not reply as soon as they get a message?



2. Did I just get unlucky on my very first attempt here and try to chat with a bot, a fake profile?



3. If the other user isn't a fake, how do I verify whether she got and read my message(s)? How can I tell if the other person isn't simply a bot?



If anybody here can give me some insight into what's exactly at play here, it would be greatly appreciated. I really don't want to have to bust some woman by accusing her of being rude or claiming that she's a robot when that isn't the case. Thanks to whoever reads this.


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From: China 江苏(jiang su) 南京(nan jing ) @paulfox1 Time : 2016-12-15 22:14:12 #1


@SCBeets2200

 

Good post! I'll try my best to help you.

 

1. Is it normal for women, Asian or otherwise, to not reply as soon as they get a message? Yes. Even though the system sends them an e-mail notifying them of your message, if they don;t check their e-mail, or check it and don't log in to CLM, you won't get a reply straight away.


 

2. Did I just get unlucky on my very first attempt here and try to chat with a bot, a fake profile? I've been a member here for over 3 years. I know how John Abbot, (the owner), operates, so you can take it from me that he does everything he can to get rid of 'bot's' and 'scammers', but let's face it, this is the world of cyber, so naturally a few are going to slip through the proverbial 'net'.

 

3. If the other user isn't a fake, how do I verify whether she got and read my message(s)? How can I tell if the other person isn't simply a bot? You can't. You can tell if she's read your message by going to your 'outbox' (sent items) and if the message title is in BOLD type, it's unread.

 

To many, CLM is just 'another' dating site. However, speaking as one who has been 'round-the-block', so to speak, I can assure you that CLM is the safest cross-cultural dating site currently on the net, bar NONE! (Oh, and I don't get paid to write shit like this, lol). If I didn't trust CLM, or John Abbot, then I wouldn't spend hours of my time writing blogs.

You really have to learn how to play 'the numbers game'. For every 10 women you contact, you may get 2 that reply. I used to try to get them off-site as quickly as possible and onto private e-mail or a mobile chat forum. However, I found that this was not always the best option. Sending messages frequently, through CLM, and seeing how long they take to reply, will give you a good indication as to when you should consider contact by other means.

I don't want to sound harsh, but by your own admittance you are 'skint and unemployed', and while I give you credit for your honesty, many Chinese women are not going to view you as a 'good catch'. To sum up, hang in there, don't give up, remain honest, and I firmly believe that with perseverance, you'll be successful.

 

Compliments of the season to you.

From: China 浙江(zhe jiang) 杭州(hang zhou ) @JohnAbbot Time : 2016-12-16 02:08:20 #2

@SCBeets2200 Because you may not be aware, I am the Managing Director and Co-Owner of ChinaLoveMatch.net and AsiaLoveMatch.net. I have reviewed your thread and I have decided to respond through a new blog. In that blog I am focusing mainly on how you are destroying your chances of getting any, or many responses, through the content on your profile. You can find that response to your thread here:



https://blog.chinalovematch.net/blog/article/My-Take-on-New-to-Chinese-Dating-Need-Help



Everyone can feel free to read my blog and then comment there or read it and then come back and comment here. Feel free to do both but please don't use the exact same comment in both places. It will only be approved in one place.


Anonymous25543
@Anonymous25543 Time : 2016-12-28 05:59:59 #3

I've been scammed on another site along with their sister sites. This one is an excellent site as they have a scammer's prison and notify you if you've been in one of the girls who's been imprisoned. I was on Match.com and caught a few scammers there and then reported them to the customer service. Some of the women I've been in contact with didn't answer their kisses or messages for a long time. When they finally replied they told me that they didn't check that often and had been very busy with work. I met the one I'll be marrying here after trying EHarmony, Match.com and a few scammer sites.

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