Chinese Women, Asian Women, Online Dating & Things Chinese and Asian
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Anonymous1005

Is She My Type (Paul Fox's Blogs) - The Hard Truth

@Anonymous1005 Time : 2013-12-15 22:14:14

During the last 2 weeks I have been chatting with 2 women



The first one is a divorced woman with an 18-month old child (I contacted her)



The second is a single woman, no kids, never married



#1 woman - we started chatting on QQ less then 1 week ago. She has asked me to marry her 3 times and has stated "I want to be your wife" no less than 4 seperate occasions. We have NEVER MET. - Surely she is Type 1 - the DDH ?



#2 woman. It seems like I may need to travel to China sooner than expected which means I will be there during the New Year. She has said she would like to meet me so I asked her to help me book a hotel. She sent me web-sites and suggested I stay at the Hilton Hotel for RMB1500 per night (I usually have a budget of around RMB300 per night)



Granted, New Year etc is going to push up the cost, but RMB1500 per NIGHT ? - no way!



Then she said she wanted a gift so I asked her what gift? - She said CLOTHES, SHOES, BAGS, COSMETICS - so she wants me to take her shopping!



Surely is Type 5 - MW



They DO exist out there! These are 2 women I will DEFINITELY not be meeting on my forthcoming trip !


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From: China 云南(yun nan) 昆明(kun ming ) @sharonj Time : 2013-12-17 20:04:54 #1
@anonymous
If you want to find a nice life partner here, these two women are not the right one of course! Actually i noticed there are large numbers nice women here on CLM. Why i know? i wrote threads, i read their threads and i talked with them..

That is why i always think most of you westerners really have no idea about how to find a nice chinese women!

@sigh@
From: China 湖北(hu bei) 黄冈(huang gang ) @zhshwu Time : 2013-12-18 02:17:19 #2
You met the wrong person,
1 , does have, comfortable and affordable price of 300 or so decent. indeed, comfortable and affordable price about 300.
2, should not have to beg for gifts. should not for gift.
From: United States @Anonymouth Time : 2013-12-18 02:29:45 #3
Hahaha!

For all you ladies who just love to call Paul out for his posts....

"Nuf said!!"

These women absolutely do exist and even if they are not a large segment of the population over all, they are present in large numbers in the demographic slice that we western men will meet as they are out trying to get us... in the areas we frequent, like deadly ambush predators.

Believe Paul!!! He speaks true...

But dont worry, we know all Chinese women are not like this. If we didn't believe there were good Chinese women out there too, we wouldn't be here. Persecute the bad women who are trying hard to lose all Chinese women's face, not the bearer of warnings for us guys to be careful. Paul is on your side, assuming you really are the good ones he's only trying to save us from making mistakes so we can actually find you...
Anonymous11057
@Anonymous11057 Time : 2013-12-18 16:44:05 #4
@anonymouth
No one is disputing that there are very real examples for each type of Paul Fox's 6 types of Chinese women.
No one is disputing that there are very real examples for each type of “10 types of western men seeking Chinese women”.
The value of both blogs is that they can help western men and Chinese women avoid problems.
Are these classifications an accurate dissection of the full spectrum of Chinese women and western men?
-certainly not!
Could these classifications have been written more sensitively?
-most definitely!
From: China 山东(shan dong) 济宁(ji ning ) @paulfox1 Time : 2013-12-18 19:02:01 #5
@anonymouth

Thanks mate !
From: Argentina Capital Federal Buenos Aires @xiangrikuiriji Time : 2013-12-18 20:03:19 #6
After saw you thread,my feelings are a little complicated.I have to admit that there is
a difference between people.
I hope you can find a real right person,i will be glad for you!

From: China 江苏(jiang su) 苏州(su zhou ) @aussieghump Time : 2013-12-18 20:20:52 #7
Ladies, you must remember that foreigners hardly get a chance to meet 'nice' Chinese women like you all say you are! We are going to come across a higher number of 'bad ones'!

Why? Because it is unlikely we will cross paths with you!

A single male foreigner is likely to be looking for company when in China - either meeting locals or other foreigners for a chat - the place they probably feel most comfortable is coffee-shops or bars... and it is likely that you are not at either!
And if you are, you would not dare speak to him!

So the foreign men end up talking to ones that are sassy, or chasing something like 'gifts' or 'money' or 'freedom' or whatever they desire in their hearts! All 7 ladies exist and in 'high numbers' for foreigners!

If you are serious about meeting a foreigner, you might need to be a little more adventurous and maybe not stay at home so much (or only do things in your local community).
I would suggest that you seek out opportunities to improve your English Language conversation skills such as
1) English Corners or similar groups (ToastMasters, community and volunteer groups or neighbourhood groups trying to reach out to foreign communities),
2) try to meet up with expat community (for example, many expat women have regular 'meet and greet' sessions),
3) find a nice cafe and read a book there regularly and just chat to whoever wanders in!
4) become friends with women who have already met a foreigner and see if you can get a suitable 'match' through them.
5) take you child to activities where they might meet foreign children and chat to some of the parents
6) try to join a sporting club or gym where there are foreign members - just get comfortable talking with them!

It is important that you do take things slow - it is highly unlikely a foreigner will want to marry you after 3 meetings. In general, they are not socially/traditionally 'marriage thinking' and it is acceptable for them to have a girlfriend for a while before marriage.

Also, what you think a situation means 'he wants to meet my parents' does not mean the Chinese meaning! He just wants to meet your parents, learn a little about your home town etc... do not put 'Chinese Thinking' on his actions - because he isn't!

What Paul Fox's blogs do show is the combined 'hope/naivety' of the Chinese women in believing that the man will marry them immediately!
And just how early some ladies will show their 'true colours'... if a foreign man smells 'desperation' or 'exploitation' they are likely to move away quickly - often giving messages that most Chinese ladies choose to ignore in their path to fast matrimony!

So, practise a little more, become confident in yourself and your ability to be pleasant and interesting and attractive (so you don't feel you need to latch on to a man quickly) and take things a little more slowly and smoothly... the fun is in the journey, not the final destination!
From: China 山东(shan dong) 济宁(ji ning ) @paulfox1 Time : 2013-12-19 21:48:57 #8
@aussieghump
Welcome back into the 'fold' my friend - you have been sorely missed !

Reading your article today actually gave me a 'revelation' - seriously!

My blogs have been giving me some flak - to say the least - mainly by what I affectionately call the 'tar-and-feather-brigade!"

They are mostly correct in what they say (which is that 90% of Chinese women are 'good' women)

However, the 'revelation' is that 90% of Chinese women are NOT on dating sites!

ALL of my blogs in respect to the "types' of women actually refer to the types of women you are likely to meet here (on CLM) or on any other Chinese dating site

So if 90% of Chinese women are 'good' then it means that 10 per 100 are not-so-good

If 10 out of every 100 are using CLM (or other sites), then that is 1000 women out of every 10,000 women in China.........and so on

So it stands to reason that if we talk to 1000 women on dating sites then a large % of them are not going to be what we are essentially looking for

We are looking for the 10% of 'good ones' from a whole host of 'bad ones' (or at least - not-so-good ones) - agree?

So as far as the tar-and-feather brigade go, I would be happy to concede that 90% of Chinese women are 'good' - but not 90% of Chinese women who use this forum (or any other dating site) - NO WAY!

Of course, they all have there reasons for being here (just as we western men have our reasons) - but we have to learn to recognize the scammers, the rogues and the 'dick-heads' in just the same way they they do - It really is a minefield!

Let me tell you what pisses me off more than anything -

1) 50 -year old women who look 21. This is an age old issue when it comes to profile photos. How can they expect us to fall in 'love' with their photo, yet when we meet for real, we fancy them about as much as we fancy our ex mother-in-law?
2) Women who constantly ask us to marry them even before we have met
3) Women who send you a 'kiss' that states "I would love you to contact me" - yet you contact them and send them a nice reply and you never hear from them again!
4) Time-wasters, tyre-kickers, game-players. They all say "I am serious" or "I am not here for games" - yet many of them are doing just the opposite

A cross-cultural relationship needs not only commitment, but also common understanding and a certain amount of 'conceding" on both sides

A western man will surely want to 'date' for at least one year before committing the rest of his life to another
How can he commit to her after a few chats on qq, a few video chats on skype and dinner in her favourite restaurant? (@Barry1, please take note)

Likewise, we must accept that peer pressure etc will play a huge part in HER "desperation" to marry

Well Hey Honey - you just gonna have to tell your folks to be a little patient!

"the fun is in the journey, not the final destination!" - LOVE IT ! Never a true word spoken my friend

Take Care

Paul








From: United States Nevada North Las Vegas @Joshua75 Time : 2013-12-20 01:34:00 #9
@xiangrikuiriji While we talk a lot about types of women, I believe most of us western men know that there are many types of women who are good and we also do not see some of the classifications as bad.. only see them as a guide.

@aussieghump <---- probably a good idea for the the women here to read his words and also for western men to understand that we might need to step out of comfort zones locations to find alternatives. He is also 100% "desperation or exploitation" is repugnant.
From: Indonesia Jakarta Raya Alastua @lovely4ivy Time : 2014-01-04 18:04:11 #10
forget that womans :| , the sound is not good , try other woman , i believed you will meet the right woman in the end (tmi)
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