Chinese Women, Asian Women, Online Dating & Things Chinese and Asian

Have you received any messages with hided IP address?

@Anonymous1694 Time : 2017-10-22 18:11:26

Hi, friends, 

Like to meet you all here. May I ask you a question? Have anyone here hided your IP address? I found that someone sent me some messages with hided IP address. Do you think that is something wrong? Or they are scammers? Is that neccessary to hide IP address? Would like to hear from you. 

Your advice will be highly appreciated. 


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From: United States Pennsylvania Pittsburgh @spiderboenz Time : 2017-10-23 17:54:36 #1

Actually, I don't receive messages in general.
From: China 浙江(zhe jiang) 杭州(hang zhou ) @JohnAbbot Time : 2017-10-24 13:00:03 #2

@Anonymous1694 - this is a very good thread, and I am glad you asked this question. I am going to give you a response from our point of view as managing this site, but I'm hoping first that you'll get some responses from other members, because I am very interested to hear what other people think, or suspect, the answer is.

From: United States Pennsylvania Pittsburgh @spiderboenz Time : 2017-10-24 13:15:39 #3
I was unaware that someone could hide their IP address. Maybe it's someone who is using a VPN in PRC?
@Anonymous25972 Time : 2017-10-24 23:59:02 #4

To me, there is no reason to hide my IP address. It will show where do you really come from. If the IP address doesn't match the location from your profile. That tells me something. Normal people will not hire there IP address. Who will spend time doing that? 

From: China 山东(shan dong) 济南(ji nan ) @sunrise68 Time : 2017-10-25 09:34:13 #5

I have no nowledge about IP address. When I receive from others, I can't find the IP address; I don't know where my IP is either, let alone, to change it.

From: United States Maryland Gaithersburg @RWByrum Time : 2017-10-25 14:36:23 #6

Bear in mind that there is an inherent limitation to the usefulness of IP addresses.  You can only obtain the location for an address on a public network, such as those provided by an Internet Service Provider.  If the address is on a private network, such as a corporate network or a non-profit network, the location of the sending computer cannot be found.  Last year I had dealings with a scammer who was operating from a private network, so I was unable to determine 'her' location even with a Whois search.

@Anonymous25975 Time : 2017-10-25 23:31:27 #7

there can be more than one reason why members are hiding their ip address. They can be behind a company firewall although they should not be online when at work lol They can be using VPN in China but since CLM is not banned their is no reason to hide your IP. There are a few other legitimate reasons why but the one that is most likely the reason for hidden IP is theyy are scammers, I would say likely 98% chance you have been contacted by ruthless scammers looking to rip you off of your money...

From: United States Pennsylvania Pittsburgh @spiderboenz Time : 2017-10-26 09:57:07 #8
@anonymous25972 Some of us are not located where we are from. For instance, I am FROM USA but have been working in PRC for the past several years.
From: China 山东(shan dong) 济宁(ji ning ) @paulfox1 Time : 2017-10-27 09:02:16 #9

It's wise to use a VPN these days. They are necessary in China. However, it's possible that someone is hiding from you because they want to try to scam you. If they even MENTION money, delete them immediately

@Anonymous25981 Time : 2017-10-27 21:45:23 #10

to further this answer, if they ask for money delete them but report them to the site administration first with all messages so they can put the scammer in scammer prison.....(basically ban them)

From: China 浙江(zhe jiang) 杭州(hang zhou ) @JohnAbbot Time : 2017-10-28 06:57:54 #11

@Anonymous25981 - thanks for adding the additional instruction to report anyone who asks for money, or hints at it, to CLM so we can investigate and take action. And yes, including copies of the chat or message in which the request for money was made is extremely helpful to us. 

You beat me to it as I was on my way here to add that, and I'm very impressed that you took the time to come back and do it yourself.(beer) Cheers

@spiderboenz - we don't actually ask members the question on CLM registration of "Where are you from?" because it adds to the confusion.  We ask "Where do you reside?" and "What is your nationality?"  We do that specifically to be in sync with the IP function.

In your own case, you live and work, and therefore "reside", in China. Knowing that, members should anticipate your IP will be in China. If you are on a vacation or short business trip in China, then you reside somewhere else, so members will expect your IP to be from that somewhere else, and might be surprised/curious/suspicious/excited to discover you are on an IP from China.

Your nationality is American, or citizen of the USA, and knowing that, members should anticipate that your passport is from the USA. Generally, people tend to think they are "from" the country they were born and raised in, but that can change over time. If you've lived in China a long time, and come to think of China as the place you will always live, you might start thinking of China as where you are from. But at present, it will never be your nationality because China doesn't accept people not born in China as ever becoming Chinese Nationals. There have been rumours that will change, but I wouldn't hold my breath.

@Anonymous1694 - regarding IPs showing up as "hidden", we have yet to figure out exactly why that is the case, but generally it has to do with either the member themselves, or possibly the private network they are using, intentionally hiding the IP. A person can be on a private network in a coffeeshop, an airport, a workplace, a cybercafe or even another person's home, and not know they are on a private network or have any control over their being on such a network. And the network can be set to hide the IP without them knowing it.

Generally though, it means that the member is utilizing an older, and/or a free, VPN or proxy server, and that device or software is providing the lowest form of hiding the IP, which is to simply remove any sign of where the IP is located or what the IP number is. The newer, better and more expensive VPNs will go further than this and allow the user to appear to be on a different IP in a different location. 

The VPN we use, not to hide ourselves, but to check to see how well our site is showing up in various countries or cities, allows us to appear to be on IPs in about 100 countries and about 240 cities spread throughout those 100 countries.

You can't assume a member is bad simply because they are using a VPN or because their IP is hidden. More and more poeple are using these devices or software to avoid being tracked and spied on by governments, large corporations and potential hackers. Almost all westerners in China are using them to try to get the social sites and networks they like to view.  So far CLM has not been blocked in China, but often members will forget to turn their VPN off when they login to CLM.

In addition, some security programs now offer the use of proxy servers or VPNs as part of their services. Our program, AVG paid version, is one such program. However, we've never used that proxy service. But it isn't out of the question that someone clicks on a yes button when his security program asks if he wants to use a proxy server, without actually understanding what that even means.

Having said the above, in our experience over 90% of VPN users outside of China are scammers who use them to avoid being caught by either their victims, websites like CLM or law enforcement agencies. So members who experience someone who is on an IP that doesn't match where he or she says he or she resides, or is hidden, should be wary, and should politely question that person as to why their IP doesn't match. If you don't feel comfortable with the answer, discontinue the communication and report what has happened to us. We'll look into it.

On the other hand, if you find yourself being questioned by a member who says your IP is hidden or that your IP is not in the place where you say you are, be patient and try to figure out what might have happened.  I am not going to put words in your mouth here, because there are no doubt a few scammers who'll be reading this at sometime, but don't be insulted, don't get defensive and just try to resolve why your IP may not match your actual location. If you're on a VPN, offer to close it and then close and reopen your browser, and then log back into CLM, re-connect with the member, and see if that clears things up.

Finally, the fact that a person's IP does match their location is not proof that they are not a scammer at all. They can easily be at an IP that does match their stated location or appears to match it by using a good VPN, and still not be who they say they are, so don't relax just because the IP is correct.

You can only start to relax when your first video chat clearly demonstrates that they are the person in their profile photos, and you can become further relaxed when, after several months of ongoing communication they have never hinted that they are in need of money.

You can be very relaxed when you've been together in person frequently, at least partially at the expense of the other person, and things are going very well, with nary a hint that your money is key to the relationship existing.

And you can finally relax 100% after you've been happily living together or married for 10 years or more, and everything remains idylic. That's about when you can be sure you're not being scammed.

Okay, maybe I'm exagerating a bit. Maybe 8 years is enough.;)    

From: Australia South Australia Adelaide @melcyan Time : 2017-10-30 12:23:09 #12

This forum thread has started me thinking about using a VPN. One of the reasons I like CLM is because it inevitably challenges my thinking, often unintentionally.  Sometimes bloggers set out to influence me but their blogs lead me in a direction that was very different from their original intention.


This blog started me googling VPN's. I have now read enough to think it is worth trying one. 


I don't like the thought of being profiled on the internet by advertisers and political groups. I will experiment with using a VPN to see if it offers me greater protection from unwanted profiling.

The following talk and article influenced my thinking


John, you said

 "So members who experience someone who is on an IP that doesn't match where he or she says he or she resides, or is hidden, should be wary, and should politely question that person as to why their IP doesn't match. If you don't feel comfortable with the answer, discontinue the communication and report what has happened to us. We'll look into it."

That sounds very reasonable. We all should feel comfortable asking questions about anything (not just IP addresses) that does not match up. However, the willingness of your “potential future partner” to answer questions openly and honestly matters more than just the single criteria of IP address. I am happily partnered but if I was seeking a partner on CLM I would probably volunteer the information that I was using a VPN and spell out under what conditions I was prepared to step outside of VPN protection.


I haven’t started using a VPN yet, but after I have used it for a while I will return here to add further comment.




From: Switzerland Bern - Berne Bern @kalzorch Time : 2017-10-30 18:40:20 #13

There are legitimate reasons to obfuscate the IP address.  If you can't tell s/he's a scammer by other means, then you probably shouldn't be on any dating site.

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