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From: Australia South Australia Adelaide @melcyan Time : 2019-01-30 18:40:16


Life is full of challenges. Master one and many more arise.


Why do some couples drown in a sea of challenges and others thrive? I witnessed another relationship close to me end last week. It is so frustrating for me to see a relationship that had the potential to work well abruptly end. It is very easy to lose ourselves in the minutia of day to day existence. Despite sometimes feeling that we are surrounded by negativity we still need to find space for our own personal growth. A day that is merely survived is a day wasted. Just surviving is cancer for relationships.


We need to take great care with the choice of our “wants” and “aspirations”. Never confuse them with genuine needs.


Does it help or hinder us to put other people in boxes? It may make life “simpler” but too often that simplification takes us further away from genuinely understanding another.

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From: Australia South Australia Adelaide @melcyan Time : 2019-02-25 11:44:59 #1

A lot has happened in just over 3 weeks. They are not back together and it looks like the split is permanent. However, the guy whose partner left him is doing all the right things. He has had two counseling sessions, made plans to change his fitness and lifestyle, and is in the process of changing his accommodation. He is mixing a lot with the people who love and support him. While I am still grieving the end of their relationship, I am optimistic about his future.

From: Australia South Australia Adelaide @melcyan Time : 2019-03-03 08:18:56 #2

Whenever you pursue something that is worthwhile, problems and setbacks are almost inevitable. How you deal with those problems and setbacks is absolutely crucial. Several weeks into my Decluttering program my second son's two-year "perfect" relationship ended. I was shattered. In the past, this would have been enough for me to abandon my decluttering program and devote full attention to my son. How did I stop this happening?


I put the problem and my reactions to the problem on paper ( and this forum thread) and let it go. I still made time to listen to my son as much as he needed and help where ever possible but I did not get caught up in a 24 hour a day son-emergency. The cluttered me (the fire-fighting me) of the past would have. I have a long way to go to complete my decluttering program but the progress that I have made so far has stopped me being completely side-tracked by an emergency.


This has been my first major obstacle. There will be more. That's life!

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