Chinese Women, Asian Women, Online Dating & Things Chinese and Asian

Fooled on New Year’s Eve

From: Australia South Australia Adelaide @melcyan Time : 2018-01-01 21:08:50

Around 8pm on New Year’s Eve, my partner showed me a bracelet that was given to her about 4 years ago. She said I knew the man that gave her the bracelet but she would not reveal his name. She said the bracelet was very important to her and she valued it greatly.


I was tired because I had worked hard all day getting my house ready for my partner’s visit and this surprising revelation was not pleasing me. “Why is the bracelet so important to you?” I asked. She said this man wanted very much for her to have the bracelet and he had worked very hard for two days to earn the money to buy it for her. “It doesn’t look that good. I bought you a much better bracelet the first year we were together and I also worked hard for two days to earn the money to buy you a nice necklace several years ago.”


What I was hearing made no sense to me but my partner was beaming from ear to ear. She said this man was a very good man. She trusted him completely. As I started to get annoyed she asked me to unclasp the bracelet. I had to use my iPhone torch because it was hard to see the clasp. It took a while for me to get it off her wrist.


She then unwound the bracelet. It was not a bracelet at all. It was a necklace that had been double spiralled to make it look like a bracelet. It was the necklace that I had given her four years ago. All the positive words about this “other man” were actually words about me. I have played tricks on my partner many times in the past but this was the first time my partner had successfully tricked me.


I could not believe that I had missed so many obvious clues. My partner is a hopeless liar. She cannot lie to me without producing a huge smile at the same time. This “other man” had worked two days to earn the money to buy her the bracelet. Exactly the same time that I had worked to buy her a necklace. I didn’t get to contemplate how dumb I was for very long.


My partner told me the man who gave her the necklace was the only man she could ever love and she will be with him forever. Our New Year celebrations started early.

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From: China 浙江(zhe jiang) 杭州(hang zhou ) @JohnAbbot Time : 2018-01-02 14:26:10 #1

That is a lovely New Year's story Melcyan. It really brought a smile to my face. I hope all our members had a New Year's Eve moment as delightful and pleasing as you had, but I suspect that many did not. Good for you and cudos to your partner.

From: Hong Kong,China Hong Kong Tuen Mun @jellyfish Time : 2018-01-02 20:58:01 #2


It is such a lovely and touching story. I love it. 

Your story sells that the reward of having a loved one is huge!!!! Even sometimes, we don't have what we are dreaming right now, the journey of searching a soulmate is worthy! It is not easy but definitely it is worthy!!! 

Happy New Year to you. 


From: Hong Kong,China Hong Kong Tuen Mun @jellyfish Time : 2018-01-02 21:02:19 #3


It is hard when we are still single but reading other's love and sweet story. However, what I have learn is: "See the possibility in the situation even we don't" 

We have to hope and keep going even we don't see the destination and the reward right at this moment. Hope keep us from paralyzing in a "seem-to-be hopeless" situation. 

I wish all my friends on this platform a wonderful life long partner and a fruitful marriage. 


From: Australia South Australia Adelaide @melcyan Time : 2018-01-03 20:15:23 #4


Thanks for your kind words John. It is strange that sometimes CLM is the only place that  I can share a special moment or thought. Just over a year ago I wrote "An atheist's Christmas tree". Thank you, John, for giving me the forum to record special moments like these.

From: Australia South Australia Adelaide @melcyan Time : 2018-01-03 21:08:13 #5


Thank you for your kind words. I enjoyed reading your blog "What Happened at the End of Every Fairy Tale".  You obviously value having a growth mindset. If you were forced to choose between having a "dream" and having a "growth mindset", which one would you choose?

At 65 years of age, I choose a growth mindset in preference to a dream without hesitation. Dreams do not always serve our best interest. Living each day with self-love, dignity, gratitude and awareness fully serves our best interest and matters much more than any dream. Hindsight shows me that many of the dreams that I have had in my life were clearly against my best interest. Many of the rejections that I have received from women over the course of my life were actually in my best interest. A much younger me could never get his head around that possibility.

Does a growth mindset require us to carefully examine how well our dreams serve our needs?

From: Hong Kong,China Hong Kong Tuen Mun @jellyfish Time : 2018-01-04 23:27:22 #6



Thank you so much for your reply. If you enjoy reading my second blog, it means a lot to me as I want to bring some meaningful or at least interesting perspectives to my readers. 

To respond your question quick and brief as below: 

1. If there is only choice to pick between growing mindset or dream: I will pick up the growing mindset because only have a growing mindset will have chance to make my dream come true. ;) 

2. I strongly agree with you that so many times dreams don't serve us the best interests. It takes time to realize this, especially for the youth! growth mindset is a learning process of ALWAYS examining between the result and what you want. I strongly recommend you to read the book. If you don't have time, go for chapter 6. 

I am very inspired when I read your comments. As your experiences reminded me our dreams don't always serve the best for us. The best is yet to come. This is what I learn. 

Will talk to you more later as you also brought out some interesting topics to me. 


From: China 山东(shan dong) 济宁(ji ning ) @paulfox1 Time : 2018-01-05 20:33:09 #7

For those interested, MY NYE was just 'perfect' in every way.

On Boxing Day I made a split-second decision to go to Bali for a week. I booked the flight at noon and by 6pm I was on the plane.

I met up with a few people and we had made plans for NYE that I was looking forward to.

Sadly, for those Aussies who know Bali well, there's this little 'syndrome' known as 'Bali-Belly' (I shouldn't need to go into detail......

Needless to say, the dreaded 'BB' hit me on NYE and I daren't go anywhere that meant I was more than 5m from the bathroom.

Right opposite the hotel was a 'convenience store', but that was 20m away. I dreamed of nipping over there and treeating myself to a bottle of vodka and a few small bottles of tonic, but was too far away !

From: Australia South Australia Adelaide @melcyan Time : 2018-01-06 16:14:20 #8

Paul, so sorry to hear about your New Year’s Eve Bali-Belly.

I have been lucky enough to avoid Bali- Belly in Bali but on my first trip to China in 2011, for 7 weeks of the 10-week trip, I was similarly affected. The only benefit was coming back to Australia 8 kilograms lighter.   

@Anonymous26124 Time : 2018-01-06 20:37:40 #9

My New Year's Eve was spent with my wife of almost 5 months whom I met here on CLM. We were able to eat some snacks and toast as  began as the new year commenced.. Then we took communion together (Lord's supper) and prayed. Then to bed to play together as "Song of Solomon" describes it. It was a very meaningful start to 2018.

From: Australia South Australia Adelaide @melcyan Time : 2018-02-06 06:13:01 #10

Every relationship has its own Achilles’ heel. Conditions for a relationship will never be perfect. The challenge is to make the best of what you’ve got. The Achilles’ heel for my partner and I is fatigue.


As a full-time carer for her mother five days a week, my partner has very little room to move with controlling her fatigue. My own fatigue nearly brought me undone in this story. My fatigue is mostly self-induced. I often go to bed too late during the week. I also need to keep my house clean and tidy every day instead of leaving the cleaning until the last minute.


After my partner went home yesterday morning I made a commitment to myself to make my sleep pattern healthier and keep my house clean and tidy every day. So far so good, but it has only been 24 hours and I need to keep consciously repeating this healthier pattern everyday until it becomes a habit.

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