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John Abbot is co-owner of ChinaLoveMatch.net. Married to a lovely Chinese Lady and living in China, John knows and respects China, Chinese Women, Chinese People and Chinese Culture. His blog will include good stuff about Online Dating, Chinese Women, International Relationships and Things Chinese. Join John Abbot on Google+
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2010-04-05
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Wading In on Western Scumbag Men vs Desperate Chinese Women (Part 1)

5936 Views | 10 Comments | 0 Articles | 8/28/2011 11:38:18 PM
When is a Scumbag Man not a Scumbag? Read more…
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Do Chinese Women Have a Bias Against Black Men? (Part 3) Solutions???

6872 Views | 5 Comments | 1 Articles | 7/8/2011 1:47:08 AM
Well, here goes. I’ve been putting off writing this for too long, not because I didn’t want to write it, but because I had hoped to suggest answers to how we can best address the problems of prejudice based on ethnicity, culture or skin colour (or a combination of all 3) here on CLM. My reasons for delay have mostly to do with having raised a problem for which I have found so few solutions. The truth is I have very few answers, and the few I do have are pretty simplistic. But the best of what I have to offer has finally been put in place, and I can’t put this off any longer, so, as I said, here goes… Read more…
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Do Chinese Women Have a Bias Against Black Men? (Part 2) Initial Analysis, Personal Experience & Discussion of Misplaced Anger

8873 Views | 4 Comments | 0 Articles | 5/21/2011 12:55:33 AM
Part 1 of this series drew some very cogent comments, some coated in anger or frustration, some in empathy and one in shame, and since writing the first draft of this article I have reviewed those comments and amended it accordingly. I’m going to first point out what I think the statistics I gave in part 1 do tell us, then discuss my own personal experience in China, discuss why anger does not belong in this discussion and briefly discuss why there is such a bias as apparently exists. There will be a part 3 in which I will conclude our (CLM’s) thoughts on the subject and describe what we feel might be done to help address the issue (if anything). Read more…
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Do Chinese Women Have a Bias Against Black Men? (Part 1) The Question & The Signs

18468 Views | 11 Comments | 0 Articles | 5/12/2011 10:31:09 PM
I’m about to embark on a topic that has been quietly brewing here on CLM behind the scenes since we started the website, and I am not taking this step lightly, nor without trepidation. To even raise the question of racial prejudice invariably leaves me wary that, with the best of intentions, maybe I will make a misstatement, or use a phrase that was acceptable last year to refer to an ethnicity but has become insulting this year without me knowing it. However, a male member recently posed a question to us that really demands an answer and an open discussion that involves all members. Read more…
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Finding Her Back Home or on CLM - What are the Odds?

3677 Views | 6 Comments | 0 Articles | 4/20/2011 12:25:42 AM
We had a very interesting "discussion" via email with a member recently who had decided to cancel his membership even though he had 2 weeks remaining on a 1 month Gold upgrade. When he asked to be deleted we felt compelled to ask why to see if he was upset with us for some reason. The "conversation" that developed went like this: Read more…
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Issue #1 of the New NewsLetter

2514 Views | 0 Comments | 1 Articles | 4/18/2011 11:12:52 PM
Okay, we issued the new CLM NewsLetter and in it we asked you to click on a link and come to this blog to comment on it. Only one problem - we forgot to add that link. Well our faces are red but such is life. We have corrected that issue today with the ALM newsletter. We apologize to CLM members, but we'd still like your comments. And please believe me, while we'll be ecstatic to hear good comments and things you like about it, the truth is it's a work in progress and we want to know any ideas or thoughts you have on how to improve it. Read more…
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Devastation in Japan – a Time for Reflection

3238 Views | 2 Comments | 3 Articles | 3/18/2011 11:25:01 PM
There is usually a noticeable animosity in China towards Japan, not by everyone but by a significant number that I would say is more than 50% of Chinese. Considering the history between these countries, particularly in the years between 1932 and 1945, it is little wonder that Chinese do not care for the Japanese. The Japanese very clearly committed gross acts of inhumane treatment of the Chinese during this period and that has been pretty well documented and accepted by everyone in the world except the Japanese government. For a heartbreaking introduction to the subject you might start with The Rape of Nanking: The Forgotten Holocaust of World War II by Iris Chang. Read more…
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Lonely Guy Gets Confused By China

4836 Views | 6 Comments | 0 Articles | 3/6/2011 11:47:58 PM
An employee recently brought the following letter to my attention from a visitor to CLM who had some questions to which he needed answers. I felt it merited a blog article so many of you could add your comments, since many of you have experience and knowledge beyond mine in these areas. First you will find the letter then you will find my response. Please do then add your own advice and thoughts. Bloggers, please feel free to write your own response as a separate blog posting and then just provide a brief comment here with a link to the posting. Read more…
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CLM Kicks a Pig Off the Website

5066 Views | 14 Comments | 0 Articles | 2/24/2011 2:38:16 PM
We have a general policy to not intervene in personal dealings between members unless we see that there is some element of fraud involved (scamming, to be precise). However, occasionally a member's ongoing behaviour is just so rude, obnoxious and indefensible that we just can't take it anymore. We recently kicked a guy off of the website for such behaviour. With his username changed to protect his privacy (although he doesn't really deserve it) the following is the letter we wrote to him advising him of our decision: Read more…
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The Party is Over

2855 Views | 1 Comments | 1 Articles | 2/20/2011 4:08:46 PM
Spring Festival is over and it’s time to get back to work, for both Chinese citizens and for Expats in China. And after 15 days of eating, imbibing and partying, it’s not unwelcome. Does that remind you of the New Year’s Festive Season back in your part of the world? Read more…
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