Chinese Women, Asian Women, Online Dating & Things Chinese and Asian
Peter lived for nearly a half-decade in China, including two as a Peace Corps volunteer, and is the author of Socrates in Sichuan: Chinese Students Search for Truth, Justice and the (Chinese) Way. It is the intention of his blog to foster the sort of intercultural understanding necessary for long term relationships.
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Who Needs Feminism?    

By Peter V
3234 Views | 10 Comments | 8/22/2014 12:29:47 PM

Although there are numerous reasons Western men provide for explaining why they join international online dating sites like China Love Match, one that is frequently mentioned is feminism. Now it seems that Western men are not the only ones who have a problem with feminism.  A tumblr account "Women Against Feminism" has sparked quite a bit of controversy by portraying women holding up signs detailing their reasons for being opposed to feminism.  Here are some of what the signs are saying.

I don’t need feminism because:

"I am not a victim.”

“I don’t hate all men/not all men are rapists”

“Contemporary feminism fosters enmity, selfishness and fear. It devalues the unrelenting responsibility and the incredible joys of motherhood.”

“Men and women are psychologically and physiologically different."

To repeat: it isn’t me saying these things; it isn’t men saying these things; it is women—a lot of them, as you will see if you go on the site or one of its companions that has sprung up.

Discussions about feminism are inherently controversial, inevitably heated and invariably inconclusive. Part of the problem is a failure to clearly define the term.  I think a good place to begin is by stating what feminism is not. Feminism is not the notion that women deserve equal treatment before the law and equal opportunity in the workplace.  

The notion of the equality of human beings is more aptly defined as humanism. And while feminism shares this belief, this belief does not define the movement in any interesting way. A movement must be defined by what distinguishes from other movements, in the same way that a particular plant must be defined by what distinguishes it from other plants. And just like you can’t define a rose as a flower that has petals because that in no way distinguishes it from other flowers, so you can’t define feminism as entailing equality in the workplace and before the law since this in no way distinguishes it from other movements that share this belief. If that is feminism, then we are all feminists.

So what does define feminism?

1. Feminism believes men and women have the same fundamental nature.

I would argue this is the fundamental philosophical assumption of the system. Men and women have the same natures and any observable differences are culturally imposed. While sex is a biological fact, gender is a cultural creation, one that could be other than it is. Women are not more nurturing by nature, nor are men more aggressive. The reason men are more aggressive is that little boys are urged to play with toy soldiers while girls are given dolls. In a fair and just society, humans would exhibit similar psychological traits.

2. Feminism believes that men by their very nature seek to oppress women.

A complement by a man is an attempt to turn you into an object; opening the door or giving a seat to a woman is seen as telling her that she is weak and needs your protection. There is a basic suspicion of men at the heart of modern feminism. As one of the comments put it “there is a hard core misandry (hatred of men) and victim culture in modern feminism that is deeply disturbing.”

3. Feminists have a disdain for traditional family roles, especially for the stay-at-home mom.

This may be more a working bias than a fundamental assumption of the ideology. But ask yourself when was the last time you met a feminist who was a stay-at-home housewife, or who wants her daughter to be a stay-at-home housewife. Anyone who wants to deny that this is an attitude shared by many feminists has probably not talked to many feminists. Indeed, this is probably the most commonly shared critique of feminism in the various pictures on tumblr.

These are the claims that distinguish feminism. Unsurprisingly, if you read the signs on tumblr, you will see that these themes emerge again and again. The women who raise these objections aren’t overreacting. They aren’t imagining these things. This is how these women have experienced feminism, and their views cannot be dismissed.

In addition to trying to discount the experience of the women on the tumblr sight, the most common objection is some version of the following.

“It’s very easy for Women against Feminism to declare that they don’t need feminism using the voice and powers that feminism made possible."

The claim that you should not criticize feminism today because it has been responsible for the advancement of women’s rights in the past is a version of what is known as the genetic fallacy: Using the origin of an ideology as a way to either discredit or defend its contemporary status. It is like claiming you can’t criticize the racism of the Republican Party in America today because it was a Republican president who eradicated slavery. The past is past, and a position should be evaluated on its current status and the reasoning of those defending it today. And in the case of feminism, as the tumblr account demonstrates, there are some pretty big flaws in both.

Copyright owned jointly by Author and CyberCupid Co., Ltd. Breach of copyright will be prosecuted.
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#2014-08-22 12:54:07 by JohnAbbot @JohnAbbot

Peter, this is one of the most interesting posts I've seen on the Blogs, and I want to give it some serious thought before responding in full. However, needless to say, I agree wholeheartedly with the conclusion both you and "Women Against Feminism" have reached, that Feminism has crossed the line from being a necessary and valuable movement and is now racing towards being a movement of entitlement, ugliness, misguided anger and hatred. It has, in my opinion, run its course and needs to be dismantled before it cripples society and gender relations beyond repair.

I am most interested to know how our Chinese women respond to this article, and will probably try to get them to come and respond.

I will be back to comment further after giving it more thought.

#2014-08-22 19:15:57 by panda2009 @panda2009

I don't need femilism, my tenet is: "Conduct myself like a lady, mode of thinking like a gentleman."

Note: "lady" refers to the "wonderful woman", who is by no means some weak image, words and deeds of conservative expectations of certain men. Having the wisdom, courage, free will, life interest, these, are the fair Lady's core standards.

#2014-08-23 19:51:50 by Barry1 @Barry1


With reference to Panda's comment above - and just to confuse matters a little - my idea of good male behaviour is:

"Conduct myself like a gentleman, mode of thinking like a lady". (wasntme)

#2014-08-23 22:08:31 by AchelleVinzons @AchelleVinzons

Hi Peter! I wanted to give my two cents on a couple of points you made here, but those two cents turned out to be a box-full so I decided to write my response in a blog, instead. :) Hats off to you for bringing up this issue and sharing with us your penetrating thoughts on it! Cheers!

#2014-08-24 01:18:20 by panda2009 @panda2009


The boys tend to think we girls are long-haired but short wit, a frog in a well, similar as "dumb blonde" in western world.

So if you mode of thinking like a lady, brain-dead brother?

#2014-08-24 10:53:28 by sandy339 @sandy339

Thanks for sharing “tumblr”, I have learnt a lot of authetic information of Western world and English from your blogs:-) and at the same time, I feel frustrated that we could not reach tumblr, but I can open the link.
I don’t think this tumblr account is a big deal, there are always different voices in any opinion, Feminism is just a concept, finally one would live up with the stantard he/she have brought up with, I think.

#2014-08-24 16:30:49 by Barry1 @Barry1


"So if you mode of thinking like a lady, brain-dead brother?"

Yes Panda, let me assure you I'd rather be a brain dead brother than act like some of the aggressive misogynists or rude ruffians out there, all of whom obviously have small penises, so their intolerable behaviour is one way of compensating for this embarrassing deficiency. (giggle)

#2014-08-25 16:46:48 by Belle77 @Belle77

I think man and woman are different by nature, and yes we don't need feminism

#2014-08-26 00:34:04 by panda2009 @panda2009


Sorry, maybe I offend you.

I have to explain here: In China, views of a woman = shortsighted [worthless] views not to be taken seriously.

So I think that no men are willing to think as a woman. A gentleman's thinking should be more reasonable, logical, and clear.

#2014-08-26 15:56:19 by Barry1 @Barry1


No offence taken, Panda.

I have long thought that ladies on average were smarter than men, as was graphically demonstrated by one of my past forum articles:

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