Chinese Women, Asian Women, Online Dating & Things Chinese and Asian
Born and raised in a small and remote village of China with two siblings, Zoe had a childhood with wild freedom in nature. After finishing her education at Dalian Foreign Languages University, she has been living and working in Dalian. A woman of strong feelings and a passion for life, Zoe's first series of vibrant articles will tell you about the rollercoaster ride that was her first serious relationship with a Western man. There is much you can learn from her telling story. After that we'll see where else she can take us and what other wonderful experiences she might share.
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The End of Our Relationship Part 26 - Out of the Ashes    

By Zoe
16703 Views | 47 Comments | 9/26/2013 4:25:50 PM

From a broken heart to new beginnings - time will heal your wounds.

Not long ago, I met a European guy. The first impression I had was that he was like a wolf, solitary and untamed. It’s written in his business card ‘xxxx International Hotel G.M.’ I felt heavy when reading this.

He was quite frank, told me that in recently two years he was in severe depression, still taking medicine to handle it.

I admire wolf, but not brave enough to dance with wolf; I am not happy either, doesn’t need another reason to be unhappier. So, I’d better walk away.

Another day, I went to the appointment to meet an American guy. The moment he was walking towards me, I seemed to see a pile of fat meat surging to me.

For being polite, I took off the glove and shook hands with him. He was holding my hand for a long time but didn’t release me, meanwhile saying ‘Zoe, oh, you are cold…’ then it’s not only disliking but nausea I felt. I pulled back my hand with power and said, sorry, I don’t see the possibility that we could continue… I left him there and ran away.

Last weekend, a friend set me with one of her friends. Before the blind date, I told myself, I must start a relationship even if for the sake of moving on from H. When I saw his shoes, of which the original color was hardly recognized; his wrinkled pants, his hair which was stuck into locks for being oily, I felt sick again. I knew he was doing project supervision, he might just have come from the work floor, but I could not see it the reason of someone’s sloppy. I put my coffee bill on the table and said goodbye.

A good friend said, if someone loved me as his life, I would devote my love whole heartedly.

I answered, for me, only wish someone could cherish my love if I loved him as my life.

I would end my story with a song :

If not being in love in you
Why being wide awake in midnight
All the thoughts are about you
Miss, miss, missing you

If not being in love in you
Why sigh unconsciously
In every random day
Miss, miss, missing you

Love tortures
But I’d not give it up
Trying to read you
If there is my name written in your heart

If not being in love in you
Why sigh unconsciously
Feeling incomplete
Love, love, loving in you

他递过来的名片上印有‘某某国际酒店 总经理’。心里对自己‘哦’,不免又有些发紧。

因为礼貌,我摘掉手套跟他握手,他居然抓着我的手不放开,说‘Hi, Zoe, you are cold.’我已经从反感上升到恶心了。我把手抽回来,说,很抱歉,但是我不认为我们有继续交往的可能。








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(Showing 1 to 10 of 47) 1 2 3 4 5 More...
#2013-09-26 16:40:05 by JohnAbbot @JohnAbbot

I can't speak for everyone, but I'm very thankful for your courage in telling us your story Zoe. It has been a very candid look into a broken heart, and into the mind and soul of a lovely Chinese woman.

Not all Western men are wolves or piles of fat meat. I have no doubt that in time you shall find a kind, loving heart of a good western man to beat next to yours, and then you'll be forever thankful that your relationship with H ended when it did. This is the way of love.

Thank you for an emotional but enjoyable ride. I hope this is also the beginning of a new series of blogs from you. I'd miss seeing you here.

#2013-09-26 17:23:07 by purplesea1970 @purplesea1970

Zoe:you need time,maybe 3 years or more.but keep moving on.thanks for your blog,really tired of those silly arguments threads on CLM,and you do the best.

#2013-09-26 18:17:23 by panda2009 @panda2009

All of these emotional issues are routines. As if you see a movie, after starring was clarity in the first seconds, certainly will appear behind; Or the emphasis teacher told you, it is likely to appear in the exam paper. They all have their own path to follow, when you were clear the apprach, basiclly would not see any exception, nor be surprised for those relationships trend.
You should be more gentle, you don't deserve him, no longer fantasy, control your desire...

#2013-09-26 18:32:35 by anonymous7423 @anonymous7423


#2013-09-26 18:46:33 by anonymous7424 @anonymous7424


#2013-09-26 20:03:32 by shellnong @shellnong


#2013-09-26 21:25:52 by luyennmengreal @luyennmengreal

Thanks Zoe, give us such a beautiful story from the beginning to the end.
For me, i also only wish someone could cherish my love if I loved him as my life.
Good luck to you. Wish you have a great future.

#2013-09-26 22:25:15 by yeranyi @yeranyi

after reading your story and the poem ,i am sad, women's attetion is love ,but young men's focus is sex.所谓 男人重性,女人重情。女人容易伤到自己。

#2013-09-27 01:15:07 by anonymous7429 @anonymous7429

"I seemed to see a pile of fat meat surging to me"


#2013-09-27 01:23:06 by anonymous7430 @anonymous7430

anonymous7424 - you wrote "女人总是很难忘怀睡过她的男人"

I think this is the same for some men as well. For some people, making love is a spiritual experience shared by a caring couple.

I know some guys who can sleep with a different woman every night. As exciting as that sounds from a male testosterone standpoint, it is a completely empty experience. What is the point if there is no true connection? It is not love, it is purely an animal act.

(Showing 1 to 10 of 47) 1 2 3 4 5 More...
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