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Born in the UK but now living in Australia, Paul Fox has travelled to many places throughout China. He has seen the lighter side, the darker side, both the gentle and the seedy sides. He documents his experiences and is willing to share them with anyone who wants to listen. He is not afraid to say things exactly how he sees them, and is quite happy to "name and shame" when necessary.
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Respect.....If you want to know the time...Part 3    

By Paul Fox
389 Views | 16 Comments | 12/25/2019 12:46:34 PM
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A few years ago I was fortunate enough to meet the nicest person I have ever met in my life. She would have been in her 30s, never married, nor ever likely to be lucky enough to find a guy who would find her physically attractive, yet she was an awesome human being.

Every one of us is made up of two 'parts'. We have our physical self, (what I often refer to as our 'meat-suit'), and our 'inner-self'. Our physical self is what we are, whilst our inner self is who we are.

 

We are often attracted to what we see. The 'inner' person is what we come to know.

This is where cliches such as 'You shall know them by their fruits' comes from in many ancient texts.

So what do birds, grains of sand, rats, humanity, and policemen have in common?

What does it have to do with respect?

 

Imagine you are in a busy shopping mall. There are people everywhere. Now imagine you had the ability to remove everyone's 'meat suit', including your own. What would you see?

Everyone would look identical to you. Everyone could easily be compared to grains of sand on a beach, or the flock of birds shown in part 2.

Now imagine being at a fairground and going into the 'hall of mirrors'. There's no difference.....all the 'people' around you, are 'you'.

What's more, just as I explained with the rats, we are all 'connected' in some way - humanity is simply a huge 'loaf of bread', and we are each just a single slice.

If that analogy isn't enough to show why we should respect each other, at least in the beginning, then I don't know what is.

 

Once we get to know someone, we begin to understand the person inside their 'meat suit'. This is when we need to pay attention to that cliche I just mentioned.

'You shall know them by their fruits' simply means 'we shall know them by their actions' - and we often say 'Actions speak louder than words'.

If you show no respect for me, why should you expect me to respect you?

 

There are essentially two kinds of people that we interact with every day.

The first is what's known as 'service-to-self'. These people are generally materialistic, or power-hungry. They care little about their fellow man and always put their own interests first.

I'm reminded of a famous saying, (so famous that I forget who said it), that goes, 'The true measure of a man is how he treats a person who can do him absolutely no good'

 

Then there's the second type of person, 'service to others'. Generally speaking, these people are far less materialistic; don't worship money; are generally more helpful, and prefer to work in an environment that can help other people. Obvious examples would include; doctors; nurses; teachers, etc.

 

Back in my childhood days I would have included policemen in that list. People joined the police because it used to be the Police Service. Not anymore. It's now the Police Force.

All local police forces are a registered corporation. Their goal is to make money.

Police 'officers', (which means 'policy officer'), are paid a personal bonus if they exceed their target of revenue-raising.

This means that police officers are now 'service-to-self', and not 'service-to-others'

Believe me, I have been at gatherings where many of these creatures have been heard discussing this topic - I told you, my brother is such a creature. It's quite sickening to overhear these scumbags bragging about how they stopped some poor, innocent motorist, and then 'found' certain things wrong with his vehicle just so they could hit him with a fine.

Even though this is a direct violation of the Australian Constitution, they don't care, and the 'sheeple' don't know.

 

So to sum-up. I expect to be respected until the time arises when I do something that causes you not to respect me.

I conduct myself in exactly the same way. So when I am accused of 'not respecting women', due to the nature of some of my blogs, please understand that I am writing about people who have disrespected me.

 

Final thought: Don't take life too seriously. After all, no-one gets out alive.

Happy Saturnalia.

 

 

 

 

 

Copyright owned jointly by Author and CyberCupid Co., Ltd. Breach of copyright will be prosecuted.
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#2019-12-25 12:45:19 by JohnAbbot @JohnAbbot

Before I can enter the comments that come first to mind I need to ask a couple of questions.

You wrote:

A few years ago I was fortunate enough to meet the nicest person I have ever met in my life. She would have been in her 30s, never married, nor ever likely to be lucky enough to find a guy who would find her physically attractive, yet she was an awesome human being.

What prevented you from falling in love with this awesome human being and asking her to be your lifemate?

Now imagine you had the ability to remove everyone's 'meat suit', including your own. What would you see?

Everyone would look identical to you. Everyone could easily be compared to grains of sand on a beach, or the flock of birds shown in part 2.

Now imagine being at a fairground and going into the 'hall of mirrors'. There's no difference.....all the 'people' around you, are 'you'.

What causes you to assume that our inner selves all look the same? We won't be looking at them through our primitive meatsuit eyes, but through the senses of our presumably much more cognizant inner self. The 'who we are', not the 'what we are.

I suspect that our inner self, or spirit or soul as some would say, has a very different appearance than any of our fellow inner selves.

I will respond further after receiving your answers.

 

#2019-12-25 12:59:20 by paulfox1 @paulfox1


@JohnAbbot

When I met that person I was still married to the ex

Your second question is rhetorical. None of us know what we would 'look like' without our 'meat-suit'. You are trying to over-analyse what I am trying to get across, and that's simply the fact that what we are, and who we are, are not the same.

The generally-accepted theory is that our soul / spirit, (or whatever else you may want to call it), is simply 'energy'. How that energy takes form is anyone's guess.

If it's true, (and I believe it is), then we're all just little balls of energy once we remove our meat-suit. Therefore, I think it's reasonably safe to assume that we're all essentially the 'same'.

#2019-12-25 20:42:14 by oldghost @oldghost

Without affecting the point you could have deleted the long obscure meandering preamble and said it succinctly as in the penultimate paragraph.  The rest was thick dough on a meagre dumpling.

One gives respects until it is not warranted.  One assumes honestly decency generosity until those assumptions are unwarranted, and none of those depend on the meat wrapping.

#2019-12-25 20:48:21 by oldghost @oldghost

@paulfox1 brought to mind a Peggy Lee song from way back - Is that all there is? If that's all there is my friends.  Not even a DUH moment, only a small fleeting huh moment.

#2019-12-26 10:16:10 by melcyan @melcyan

It is obvious that Paul and I have very different understandings of the word respect. When I use the word "respect" on CLM I am clearly focused on what it means for a lifelong loving relationship. For me, respect definitely does not start as an automatic given that is there to be lost with abuse. Respect is earned over a long period of time in lifelong relationships. Even though respect builds slowly it can still be lost quickly.

 

Here is a challenge to all on CLM who aspire to a lifelong loving relationship. Put down on paper what respect and self-respect mean to you. Then use the internet to look at case studies of successful lifelong loving relationships to discover the role that respect has played and the meaning that these couples attach to the word. Respect, change and growth are essential components of a lifelong, loving relationship.

#2019-12-26 14:08:48 by paulfox1 @paulfox1


@melcyan

If any of us were acquainted with a loving, LIFELONG relationship, we wouldn't be on CLM in the first place. Moot point, my friend.

#2019-12-26 14:09:59 by paulfox1 @paulfox1


@oldghost

"Without affecting the point you could have deleted the long obscure meandering preamble and said it succinctly as in the penultimate paragraph."

.......but then it wouldn't have been half as much fun.....(rofl)

#2019-12-26 14:16:22 by paulfox1 @paulfox1

@melcyan

" For me, respect definitely does not start as an automatic given that is there to be lost with abuse. Respect is earned over a long period of time in lifelong relationships"

Therefore, in your 'world', you respect no-one until such time as respect has been earned. Therefore it should work the other way too; no-one should respect you until you have earned it, right?

#2019-12-26 15:58:19 by oldghost @oldghost

@melcyan @anyone  Respect is a sine qua non in a relationship, and I repeat my assertion that one starts off with respect for anyone and everyone on first acquaintance.  Of course respect can grow in depth and breadth and that is what one should expect and require in a couple.  Deep respect is what you might be thinking of.

#2019-12-27 12:17:13 by paulfox1 @paulfox1


@oldghost

You couldn't have said it any better myself (rofl)

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