Chinese Women, Asian Women, Online Dating & Things Chinese and Asian
Nancy was born in a remote and beautiful place in northeast China. After graduating from university, she has worked as an investment banking manager and HRD in a securities company for ten years. Now she is working in a listing company in Shanghai. Nancy is independent, loyal and down to earth. What she is looking for is true love and a happy family. She has always dreamed of being a good writer and hopes her blog can be the stage for her to write her stories.
Articles :
Views :
Comments :
Create Time :
This Blog's Articles
Index of Blogs
Index Blog Articles

Remembering My Father 记住我的父亲    

By Nancy
4044 Views | 11 Comments | 7/8/2014 12:34:49 PM

Long time ago, I always wanted to write something down to memorize the days gone, also to cheer up my future life! I am very appreciated the CLM to give me the opportunity to open a blog here.

I usually can see the warm picture around me. A couple with white hair arm in arm warmly walked slowly in the sunset. Each newly-married couple has the wonderful wish to go together to the old without any serious conflicts. But in the reality, there are many more divorced, separated, no love anymore. I am sure many friends here are looking for the other part around the world with full of expectations.

The old days’ experience, no matter happy or sad, is a process which makes us grow, a life experience, a precious memory. Tomorrow will be better.

Happy Father’s Day to my father in the other world

I was born in a very remote village. That’s a very fabulous beautiful village where I spent my childhood without any worries. There is a big river separated the village from the outside world. It is not easy to go out of the village, thus the automobiles were monsters to me. I never met them before I was 5 or 6 years old. In my child’s memories, there were many deep pink azaleas all over the mountains in the spring, many pals naked playing in the pond in hot summer, scattered mushrooms and sweet mountain fruits after frost in autumn, and in winter heavy snow falling down, the temperature was very low, I skated outside with frozen face and forgot to go home. Also in my memories, my father was always working outside in all seasons.

My father has 5 children, the youngest one is a boy, four daughters, I am the fourth one, also his most favorite and spoiled one. More spoiled than his only son. In summer, if we want to visit aunt’s home living the other side of the river, there was no bridge at that time, father had to walk through the water with pants rolled up high, then the young me ride father’s neck through the river. I can remember I could not bear to see the fast water and felt dizzy and creepy.

Father likes me, he was always proud of me because I was always learning well in my school time. I was the only one in the remote village who entered the senior high school located in the county. My family’s condition was not good when I was young, father always told me not worry about money. He would support me no matter how hard the life was. In a summer vocation I don’t remember which year, father was working on the hill under the hot sunshine. I was reading in a hut nearby. I felt distressed when I saw him working outside for so long time, bowed down his back under the hot sun. I got some water over and gave him a drink. When I wipe his swarthy back, a layer of skin took off. I could not help tears whenever I thought of the scene.

It took me more than 3 hours by bus from my hometown to my high school. And all the ways were country roads. It was not easy for the bus. Father let me stay at school study hard also save the bus fees though I miss my family a lot. He often walked the half day with many foods to the school. I was always before the top 5 in the whole high school time. Father was so proud of me. He did not care about the rules, he pushed the door without knocking, no matter I was in the class or not. He would call my name directly, almost all my teachers and classmates knew my father, and my father knew some of them. When I was in summer or winter vocation, he would ask me some of my classmates one by one, whether they learned well or not. We always have topics.

Father has a bad temper. My sisters and brother were afraid of him. But I am not. I was always the one to help them communicate something with father. Mother always says I am the different one. Father would be full of joy whenever he saw me.

I worked in a good company located in the province capital after graduated from the university. The second year, I saved a little money, the first thing I wanted to do was let my father leave the village, never do the heavy labor in the village any more. I made my mind and bought a house in the county where one of my sisters was working. At that time, all my sisters have been married. Then my family including my parents and my brother moved to the county. It was a little bit hard for father to adapt the city life though I could send money to him. Father had no safe feeling without land. He would not like to stay at home doing nothing. My sister rent a few land for him, and he again labored in the less land in the early morning or in the day. Even more, he pulled out the sticks in the yard, changed the yard into the land and grew some eggplants and peppers. Sometimes he went to the superb to purchase the wastes and sell. There were full of the wastes in the yard.

Five years later, father diagnosed with cancer and left us in a half year. There was not complete family in my world. Father like a mountain left me with my love. For many years, I could not accept the reality he was not there anymore. The man love me most in the world was gone. The pain ever made my mind not to give a birth. I could not let my child bear such pain when he or she lost me. I ever blamed myself maybe he could live longer if he still was busy on his own land.

Until now, whenever I thought of my father, I felt he was with me warmly. Last weekend was Father’s Day. People blessed their fathers and I, from the bottom of my heart blessed my father in the other world silently.  “Happy Father’s Day!”













Copyright owned jointly by Author and CyberCupid Co., Ltd. Breach of copyright will be prosecuted.
(Showing 1 to 10 of 11) 1 2 More...
#2014-07-08 12:36:36 by JohnAbbot @JohnAbbot

We want to welcome Nancy to the blogs. This blog really highlights why we think hearing from the Chinese ladies is so important. This is such a wonderful picture Nancy has given us of her life in rural China growing up, of her family structure, of her incredible efforts to make life better for her parents. This blog is simply so human, and so compelling.

More than anything, it tells me that the cross cultural barrier is largely more about the language barrier than anything else.

When someone can write this story in good enough English that it created a lump in my normally hard, cynical throat, then how is she culturally so different from a girl who grew up in rural America. If I had spent my entire life in Los Angeles or New York, and I met a lady who had spent her life in rural Wyoming, wouldn't our cultural differences be nearly as great as they are with Nancy (before she made her move to Shanghai at least). The same goes for a Canadian from Toronto, an Aussie from Sydney, a Brit from London, etc., etc.

Regardless of where you are from, any man fortunate enough to meet a lady who could have expressed the thoughts expressed in this blog, to have unthinkingly sacrificed so much for her family's happiness (also regardless of where she came from), is going to be one well taken care of, happy husband with a great wife. Cultural differences be damned!

Welcome aboard Nancy. Great blog.

#2014-07-08 13:01:14 by Barry1 @Barry1

What a beautiful story to recount to us, Nancy, thank you.

I can see that you're a fine writer with a lot to share with those around you. I look forward to reading many more stories in the future about you, your life and your work.

With regard to the passing of your father, I believe only his body has died, not his spirit. I'm sure your two spirits will reconnect in another lifetime. Please know also that death is a part of life, for without death, there could be no life. So please don't look back at life with your father with sadness, but with happiness and appreciation for the wonderful times you shared together.

I'm sure also that your father must be very proud indeed of both the kindness you've exhibited and the achievements you've attained in your life. You still have so much more to offer and to experience.

Many blessings to you, Nancy. May you have a long, rich and rewarding life journey ahead of you. (f)

#2014-07-08 13:09:23 by chengcheng72 @chengcheng72


#2014-07-08 18:09:08 by Imi5922 @Imi5922

Nancy thank you for this beautiful article!

You have touched my heart deeply! You brought me back to my childhood when I lived in a small village as well. You made me to remember playing in the hills in the snow or in summer time swimming in a near by pond.

I wish if I had a relationship with my father like you had with your hardworking father.
You gave an example to me with your description what a man I should be to my family in the future.

Thank you for writing from your heart and showing us your true feelings!

#2014-07-09 09:06:23 by ferlo @ferlo

@ Nancy
For some time I have entertained the idea o writing some from my childhood, but because lack of time or scare of not writing well enough to attract readers.
Now I am sure that if I had it done it wouldn't be as near nor beautiful like you did Nancy. When you mentioned many pals naked I visual myself when I was nine to twelve years old, we the kids of the neighborhood got together and went swimming to any river or pond in the out skirts of town.
You brought memories of my childhood.
Thank you Nancy. Fernando

#2014-07-09 09:24:30 by yinanancy @yinanancy

What I want to say here is thank you so much for opening my blog.

#2014-07-09 09:27:37 by yinanancy @yinanancy


Hello Barry, I am also impressed by your story with Tina. Thank you for your so nice blessing.

And give my best wish to you and Tina, may you have a wonderful time!

#2014-07-09 09:35:03 by yinanancy @yinanancy


I was writing this one with full of tears in my eyes and heart, too.

#2014-07-09 09:41:24 by yinanancy @yinanancy


Hello Imi, I am very glad to see your comment.

I read all your blogs here and just because of yours and Barry's stories, I made my mind to write mine.

I am so touched by your love to lily. I don't know whether lily has the chance to read your love story. Anyway, time can cure all. Just keep going and I am sure you will be a very nice husband and father!

#2014-07-10 09:58:54 by anonymous10913 @anonymous10913


(Showing 1 to 10 of 11) 1 2 More...
To respond to another member's comment type @ followed by their name before your comment, like this: @username Then leave a space. Ask Nancy a Question : Click here...