Chinese Women, Asian Women, Online Dating & Things Chinese and Asian
Neil Yaun prides himself on knowing a little about everything, despite no formal college education. He is self-educated, with a love of Chinese culture focused on their history and traditions. Growing disillusioned with the direction America is taking and his negative experiences with American women he is seeking a new path in China. He plans to teach English in China. This blog is about the journey to China and all the pitfalls along the way.
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Observations of a Gui Lao: China Haters in China.    

By Neil Yaun
5450 Views | 11 Comments | 7/2/2013 5:41:11 PM

Red, white, and blue pills do it every time.

I’ve been bombarded for the past few months at work with one of my pet peeves here in China, and it’s not the Chinese that seem to drive me to insanity these days. Its disrespectful foreigners, who complain about China being terrible. I’m pretty content with knowing I’m in another country and that culture differences will come up from time to time. I accept that because before I even came to China I looked at the culture and studied as much as I could before I stepped foot in this country. I didn’t want to come off as another one of the jerks from America that the rest of the world hates.

I spent most of my study of China trying to learn how not to offend people here, which considering the relationships I have with my Chinese co-workers and the average Chinese that I meet on a day to day basis, I think I’ve done well. Now I’m not saying that some of the things in China don’t frustrate me and make me angry but I know that by showing my anger I’m just making myself look like an idiot and won’t fix the problem I have.

As a westerner living in China I’ve had to overcome my confrontational nature because I’ve always been a straightforward person who is more likely to charge the problem head on, but I’ve found that doesn’t really get you far here in China. When the people you work for can make your job much more difficult if you make things difficult for them, it makes more sense to try to compromise instead of storming head first into a brick wall.

So, these troglodytes not only complain about everything that is China, from food to the people. They also have no respect for anyone living here, be it other foreigners or the Chinese. There is no consideration on how their behavior affects the expats who have lived here for years and will continue to live here long after they have gone. They don’t understand that when they are disrespectful and are just over all jerks it doesn’t just make them look bad to the Chinese. It makes all expats look bad, and believe me we have enough problems with public image without assholes like them making it worse.

The Brit, as I like to call him, who likes to tout his Cambridge education, took a really beautiful Chinese girl out on a group outing and then preceded to call her degrading names in front of everyone. She was very polite, even though, she didn’t speak much English and here he was just being a huge dick to this nice girl. His excuse was that she didn’t understand him so it was ok. It made me sick to see someone be so disrespectful. It took all the self restraint I had not to knock his snotty ass out right then and there.

The Brits sidekick is just as annoying, even though, he’s American. His downward spiral into the realm of being an asshole came a bit later than the rest of the group, maybe because he was a friend until he drank from the poisoned chalice that all these guys were passing around. It seemed that the more these guys bitched about their lot in life, the more hostile they became about China. I even tried to put things into perspective using my own experiences, but you can’t fix stupid with reason and logic, maybe with a hammer?

The newest of the group is a guy from D.C. who is G.I. Joe The Real American Dildo. He has only been in China for about three months, and he represents every reason I left America in the first place. His sense of entitlement knows no bounds, he is arrogant to the core, and he is blind to anything that is not American. He is the image of the dumb American that the rest of the world sees when they look at America. This guy is one of the people who gets drunk and starts a U.S.A. chant just to piss people off.

It amazes me that they are still here, when it seems they want nothing more than to be back in their home countries. I feel like I may have pinned down their reason for staying though, perhaps, it’s because they know that back home they wouldn’t have nearly as nice a life as they have here. They wouldn’t be able to drink every night, and still have enough money to for nice vacations to Thailand and the Philippines, nor would they even have the time to take such vacations. They wouldn’t be able to go out and have the elaborate and expensive meals at some of the nicest restaurants in Guangzhou either.

Something else that gets my temper raised about their stay in China is that their complaints have been about China in general, yet they have never seen any other parts of China to compare what they've experienced so far. They have travelled to many of the countries surrounding China, but haven’t taken the time to actually see the beauty that is right under their noses. It’s like another slap in the face to China that they don’t even have the civility to see other things in China because maybe it’s just Guangzhou that they don’t like so much, or more than likely they really are just a bunch of douche bags.

One thing is for sure these idiots are the classic “China is one big vacation group”, and maybe I shouldn’t be so angry about their attitude but their disrespectful actions I just can’t let that slide. That’s why I’m declaring open season on juvenile assholes who can’t respect the country that was nice enough to allow them into it in the first place.

Copyright owned jointly by Author and CyberCupid Co., Ltd. Breach of copyright will be prosecuted.
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#2013-07-02 19:29:45 by anonymous6760 @anonymous6760

@Neil - "they know that back home they wouldn’t have nearly as nice a life as they have here." I would be even more specific. They would be dateless in their home country.

I know people just like you mentioned, western guys who are still in China treating women like dirt. It's sickening. I wish there was a way to deport the bad ones.

#2013-07-02 21:03:04 by aussieghump @aussieghump

Oh, another case of the 3-4 year veteran ´holy than thou´effect! - I´ve just written about it in a blog last week...(but strangely hasn´t been published yet)

From my observations, a person who has been in China for more than 4 years or has´integrated´ into the the culture through marriage/connection/language seems to take on the ´local laowai civility protector´ mantle where they are quick to call out the new hands, despise anyone who has not paid their´dues´ in the country... the truth is, we were all new chums once and we probably did some pretty atrocious things until we found our ´sensibilities´!

Ask anyone in China between 2-4 years, they can tell you ´everything about China´. The old timers will become more in tune with ´go with the flow´ and ´whatever the Chinese decide to do´.

The sad truth is that these people you are calling out are probably wankers in any culture they live in! they are probably ´faking it until they make it!´- just like all of us have at some time or other in our life!

#2013-07-02 23:58:39 by canadianmike @canadianmike

Every country has its percentage of jerks and, unfortunately, they must travel to far off and exotic locations, see different cultures, and meet interesting people. And annoy them. If I were you, I would spend minimal energy on these people. The leopard cannot change his spots. You could try to explain their shortsightedness and give a myriad of examples on why they are wrong but your logic will bounce off their thick skulls like popcorn off a brick wall. They exist to show us how NOT to act. They leave us with a better appreciation of reasonable behaviour and good manners.
Even a douche bag is good for something. ;-)

#2013-07-03 17:06:26 by destiny1 @destiny1

I read your blog made ​​me feel very sad, because I want you to live happily in China, together with your Chinese wife very happy. I hope that foreigners like China, because it means that we are prepared to come to the Garden of Eden and a foreign man league, I hope it is a good ending. Now I'm worried about your impressions of China will not affect you and your Chinese wife relationships. I am here looking for, here waiting for people who love me appear, I hope to see everyone happy, maybe your story will be like a mirror, so I feel tangled.
China is a hospitable nation, as far as I understand foreigners working and living here is very happy. Looking forward to your story below. I wish you and your Chinese wife happy!

#2013-07-04 01:41:20 by kahnsfury @kahnsfury

@Aussie I agree about the fact that no matter where they go they would be “wankers.” I just take it a little more personal when they are wankers in front of me.

#2013-07-04 01:49:00 by kahnsfury @kahnsfury

@canadianmike You are correct there are jerks everywhere, however, when you work with them it is harder to ignore. Especially when they make your job harder to do because of their ignorance.

#2013-07-04 02:58:16 by RobertB @RobertB

Good point. Maybe you did not realize, maybe you did, you just pointed out that there are two types of people and I do not care if they are Americans, Germans or even Alien invaders from other planet than Mars(Those are quite peaceful, otherwise we would be working on their mines already!)
Ok, so the first type is so called democratic supporters of market economy.
They occur everywhere even in most of Communist places.
So, how they behave and think? They think this: If it does exist, then possibly there is a demand for it and it works.
If I do not like it, I have two choices. I can move out. I can do something better using my acumen, capital and so on.
The other type of people are people who think along these lines:
Aha, it is not the way it should be!So, normally I gather force and strike!
Either annihilate or subjugate!
Well, I might not be able to defeat all the enemies. So, what can I do?
Moan and moan, hopefully I will make their lives as miserable as mine is.
Well, as you can see, the second attitude is great if you want to start a war or offend people, it is also very helpful when you want to get sick.
Generally in democratic societies people try to either adjust or to contribute to better solutions without resorting to barbaric in some way methods.
Yes, I know, sometimes we have to complain and act and try to be "tough". One should first think though if is not unnecessarily offending other people whose main fault maybe is that they try to live and possibly are put in the same situation as you are, just they understand that brandishing a fist in the air is not by itself solving any problems.
Well, if someone comes to Europe or US might obviously find many faults and problems. Should they complain straight away? Or visiting your friend's house? Next time that friend and others won't let you in and they will be right. Only then you will be moaning that you cannot get in to a place that you only know how to complain about.
In radical countries (hypothetic) such individual could be suspended in citizen's rights till gets right. Well, i bet that this used to happen in US, Germany, China and Russia in the past and we are already lucky, this policy is no longer in place. I mean, if you do complain too much you still can get in trouble. I remember a man, little drunk was carried away, very gently by police force in UK for being loud and complaining. Yes, security forces were very gentle and did not harm him, still he was removed from the terminal.
I am not trying to scare anyone. It is just a gentle reminder that people should try to behave and try not to offend others.
I hope I did not offend anyone. he he.

#2013-07-05 23:02:10 by sandy339 @sandy339

Haha, I think you used up all the bad words I ever knew, still there are something new to me, it is good….
I think you are quite righteous, in reality I just let such jerks be, I still want to show my disdain to these troglodytes (I find the words are so important in showing one’s emotions) hope they could go back their home asap!!

#2013-07-06 21:44:49 by Andypanda @Andypanda

At first reading this post ,I was with you 100% Neil. "Smash the pig's" !!!
But then after reading aussieghump's comments my head cooled a little.
I am not 3-4year veteran haha I have only visited twice for two months.
Yet I also feel this protective instinct when China is "threatened".
I fell in love with China in my short time there.
I envy these "troglodytes" who have the opportunity to live there and they should appreciate the fact that they do.
I promise that I will not insult China or its people when my soon to be wife and I move there to live in 5-10 years.
We will be Aussie's for a while first. I love Australia but I think I we will live a happier life in China.

#2013-10-25 13:56:03 by Barry1 @Barry1

@Andypanda .

It's interesting to hear you're possibly moving to China in the future, Andy.

What about the language difficulties though? Is knowing a bit of Chinglish good enough to see you through for a long term stay, do you think?

I have a friend here in Brisbane who tells me, "Unless you have a rough working knowledge of the language, you'll be missing out on a lot of culture and day to day experiences if you live in China. You'll probably stumble through okay speaking English only, but think of what you'll be missing out on, all the little mundane things happening around you that you won't be able to fully understand and appreciate."

He unfortunately seems to make a lot of sense here.

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