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Imi was born and raised in Europe, Hungary. After finishing his school years, he moved to Canada to search for a better life. He lived in Toronto for 13 years and currently resides in Vancouver. He is a romantic at heart with a strong desire to always do the right thing. He would like to give hope to the Chinese and Asian ladies with his story and send a message that love eventually finds everybody.
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My Love for Lily 我对百合的爱, Part 2 - Beginnings 开始    

By Imi
4401 Views | 8 Comments | 1/1/2014 8:04:34 AM

Language exchange can make or break your new Chinese love.

Her answer came two days later and I was happy reading it because it said she was willing to get to know me better, and if everything went well between us she would be even open talking about moving to another country.  I asked for her personal email address in my reply and went to work with a happy smile on my face, suddenly very excited about my new experience with online Chinese dating.



For the next couple of months we had been exchanging emails every other day, sending photos, telling our life stories. I had learned that her English name was Lily. She got married when she was 20 and had her son, Jeff, when she was 21. When she turned 24, her husband cheated on her but they had stayed together for another 2 years for their son's sake, without any intimacy between them. When she was 26, her husband left her and his son for the woman he cheated on them with. She has devoted her life to raise her son in the last 9 years. Now, her son turned 14 and he would understand it better if she met with another man. I admired her devotion to her son.



I wanted to know her better and asked her if she would be alright talking to me face to face on Skype. She said yes, but recommended chatting with me on QQ because her English was very limited. I installed QQ into my computer and we started another step in our relationship.



We agreed to see each other on QQ with camera on, on a Saturday for the first time, when her son was still in private school in the morning. She looked different on camera than in the photos, but in a good way. She didn't wear any make-up and I liked it very much. I was able to see her real face and it excited me a lot as I was even more attracted to this beautiful Chinese woman.



“You look very beautiful and natural” I said.



“Thank you!” She answered with a very cute accent.



I tried to talk to her in slow English but she stopped me.  “ I am sorry ....my English no good” she said.



“It's okay. Why don't you try to type first what you want to say and I will help you with the pronunciation” I wrote to her on QQ and translated it to her in Chinese.



We chatted for a while like this and I loved her accent. She was trying really hard and she did a nice job saying the words in English after me. She was giggling when she made a mistake and kept saying she was stupid. Just to make her more comfortable, I asked her to teach me some Chinese words.



“What words would you like to learn?” she asked.



“How about hello?”



“NI HAO”



“How about good bye?”



“ZAIJIAN”



“XIE XIE”



“MINGTIAN JIAN”



I repeated all the words after her and we were laughing when I was very awkward with the pronunciation. We had a really nice time together. After we said good bye to each other, I couldn't stop thinking about her, how cute she was on camera and how her Chinese accent sounded to my ears like music. I had felt very happy for the first time after my miserable last 4 years.



The next day I went out and bought a Chinese dictionary and looked up some sites in the internet about how to learn Chinese “fast.” I wanted to talk to my lovely Chinese lady using some words in her mother tongue and “impress” her with my lame Chinese. I was happy, very happy!



I took a deep breath from the crisp morning air, held it for one second in my lungs and exhaled. My lungs were dancing in my chest happily by receiving this load of fresh air. I came to this place for a run, around this lake that lies between mountainous lush forest. The tree line is coming all the way down to the water front and I had to follow this trail among the trees with the dark green lake lying on the left side of me and the mountain was towering me from the right.



The trail was stretching over 10km around the lake. Usually, there were a lot of people here, but on that day I came early to avoid the traffic. I was listening to my footsteps as I was running up and down on the hills and started thinking,



“Life is just like this trail here, sometimes going up, sometimes going down. Running down the hill is easy just like losing something or someone is easy. Running up the hill requires extra effort, just like building our lives, step by step, day by day, every day, working for the future.



Sometimes, unfortunately, life can be cruel to us and it keeps pushing us down. We might never reach the top of the hill, but we have to keep fighting back, no matter what, because this is who we are. We can never give up on having a better life or on our dreams. It doesn't matter how rich or poor we are, what matters is how we help each other climbing this hill that we call, LIFE.



People come and go in our lives and everyone of them teaches us something, to become a better, stronger person ourselves, even if they did something bad to us”.



I reached the point where I started my run, checked my time....not good, I am getting old. I used to do this 10 minutes faster. I was happy anyway, at age 42, I was still in good shape and my life was going uphill and hopefully would continue to do that for a long time.



I was planning to chat with Lily in the late afternoon, which was early morning to her the next day. We had 15 hours difference in summer time and 16 in the winter.



She planted something beautiful into my heart and it started to grow fast. I liked her simplicity and her strong will to do the right thing for her son, Jeff. She kept saying that she wasn't a good mother because she couldn't give everything to her son what she wanted, but in my eyes, she was always an incredible mother and a beautiful person, no matter what she said about herself. My belief that my future lies with a great woman of China was getting stronger.



两天后,我收到了她的回复。我很惊喜,因为她在回复中说,希望我们彼此多了解对方,如果发展顺利,再讨论是否到另一个国家生活。我回复了邮件,并要了她的私人邮箱。然后面带微笑,脚步轻盈地起身去工作。网络恋爱,还真是让人激动哦。



接下来的几个月,那根细细的网线把我和一个美丽的中国女人联系在一起。我们每天邮件来往,交换照片,诉说彼此的生活。



她叫Lily,20岁结婚,21岁有了儿子Jeff,24岁时老公有了别的女人,为了儿子,两人没有离婚,但夫妻已不再亲昵。2年后,老公离开了她和儿子,和那个女人结合。过去的9年,她的生活里只有儿子。现在儿子已经14岁,她想他会理解妈妈的生命里有另一个男人的出现。我很敬佩她对儿子的爱和付出。



我问她愿不愿意视频,这样我们可以如面对面一样说话。她建议用QQ,并一再强调自己英语很烂。我在电脑里安装了QQ,意味着我们的感情又上了一个台阶。



一个周六的上午,她的儿子外出上课期间,我和Lily有了第一次视频约会。她素面出现在镜头前,我很惊喜,比照片更漂亮更自然,我喜欢极了。



“你真漂亮!”我说。



“谢谢!”她回答道。她说英语时的口音真可爱。



我用很慢的语速跟她说话,但她还是打断我,“很抱歉 … 我的英语不好”



“这样,你把想说的话用键盘敲出来给我看,我再纠正你的发音。”我把这句话在网上翻译成汉语,并发给她。



就这样,我们聊了好一会,我真的很喜欢她说英语时的口音。她很努力地跟着我发音,说错的时候就咯咯笑,并一直抱怨自己好笨好笨。我又让她教我几个汉语单词。



“你想学什么词啊?”她问。



“比如说,Hello”!



“你好。”



“Good bye!”



“再见”



“谢谢”



“明天见”



我跟着她一字一字地学,有时候大概我的发音很搞笑,Lily被逗得直乐,我也跟着哈哈笑。这次聊天后,我的脑子里总在不停地想着Lily, 回想着她可爱的中国式发音,在我听来简直如音乐般悦耳。过去的四年,我过的压抑痛苦,这是长久以来我最开心的一刻。



第二天我去买了本汉语词典,又在网上查如何能“快速”地学会汉语。Lily的英语不太好,那么我希望能用我蹩脚的汉语俘获她的芳心。此时,现在,我很快乐,非常快乐。



晨光中我深吸一口气,并让这股清脆新鲜的空气在我的胸腔里停留片刻,再呼一口气,那股清凉的气息在我的胸膛里也欢快地跳动起来,也唤醒了我的身体,沿着这片安静美丽的湖水我开始了今天的晨跑。视线所及处群山环绕,苍劲的森林树木依然青翠欲滴。这条小道沿湖蜿蜒10公里,平时人来人往,很是热闹。我今天来的早些,避开了人群,此时甚是清静,我听着自己的脚步声,陷入沉思。



“生活好似这条小道,时而上坡,时而下坡。下坡很容易,就如失去某个人,或生活中某件很珍贵的东西,不费吹灰之力;向上坡跑,需要更多体力,就如开始新的生活,需要我们一点点,一步步,每天每天为我们所期待的生活努力。



很多时候,生活是残酷的,即使不情愿,即使努力,即使反抗,我们仍然不自觉地向坡下滑,或者,被推下坡。但是无论如何,我们不能放弃,不能放弃拥有美好生活的愿望,不能放弃梦想,这些无关身份,无关贫富,这是生活。



在我们的生命中,形形色色人来人去,出现在我们生命中的每个人都会留下痕迹,让我们成长,让我们完美,即使是那些伤害过我们的人,也教会我们要坚强。”



我已经跑回了起点,看了看时间,嗯,不太妙,比以前慢了10分钟,看来我老了。再一想,也不算糟,42岁的年纪,我的体型还算健壮,我的生活又开始了新的起点向上升,好吧,再接再厉,加油!



已经和Lili约好了今天晚上,也就是她那边第二天的早上时间,在屏幕前相会。中国和加拿大夏季时差15小时,冬季16小时。



Lily已经在我的心里播下美丽的种子,并生根发芽。我喜欢她的简单生活,她对儿子Jeff的全心倾注。她总在说自己不是一个好妈妈,给不了儿子她想给的一切。但在我的眼里,她是一位了不起的母亲,是一个美丽的女人,我坚信自己一定会与这个坚强美丽的中国女人牵手未来。


Copyright owned jointly by Author and CyberCupid Co., Ltd. Breach of copyright will be prosecuted.
Comments
(Showing 1 to 8 of 8) 1
#2014-01-01 11:12:54 by panda2009 @panda2009

@lmi
How wonderful Beginning is in 2014!
Thanks for your sharing such beautiful story to us!
Best wishes t you and Lily!
And thanks for Zoe's perfect annotation!

#2014-01-01 14:22:44 by Marrisa @Marrisa

Today is a good day, sunny and warm. And it is very nice to read this story. Warm and lovely. Like another version of "Love actually". So romantic.
I like the words "Sometimes, unfortunately, life can be cruel to us and it keeps pushing us down. We might never reach the top of the hill, but we have to keep fighting back, no matter what, because this is who we are. We can never give up on having a better life or on our dreams. It doesn't matter how rich or poor we are, what matters is how we help each other climbing this hill that we call, LIFE"
Thanks Imi for bring us this. I believe the future for you and lily will be definitely amazing happy. Looking forward to more good news.

#2014-01-01 15:40:43 by Aloes @Aloes

看了你的文章,我的眼睛有泪流下,美好而深情,写出了人间最美的爱情。真羡慕你的女主角,祝你们幸福永远,牵手成功!愿所有单身的人都能快点找到那个一直等你的人,感受美好纯真的爱情!也祝我自己,2014真爱降临!

#2014-01-01 23:38:55 by Jennifercc42 @Jennifercc42

好美的文章!好感动!

#2014-01-02 03:02:10 by JianadaYangGuizi @JianadaYangGuizi

For some reason this is very hard for me to read ...

#2014-01-02 19:33:17 by Imi5922 @Imi5922

@panda2009
Thank you for your comment!

@Marrisa
I'm glad you liked that part! I hope you you are not sick anymore!
Thank you for your comment!

@Aloes
Thank you for the comment and I wish to find your happiness soon!

@Jennifercc42
I'm glad you like my blog! I like your forum treads as well and I have to say that after reading some of them you are a very intelligent woman! If I understood it well you found your happiness and I am happy for you!

#2014-01-03 00:11:39 by QinQL @QinQL

How beautiful it is ! Thank you lmi sharing us the most wonderful stories . From it, I am recalling our dear sister Zoe’s exciting blogs as well. I always enjoy listening to someone's stories and experiences no matter the result is happy or sad. As you said “People come and go in our lives and everyone of them teaches us something, to become a better, stronger person ourselves, even if they did something bad to us”. from reading your story we can also learn much. You are a thinking man like most of western men here.

Thank you opening a window for our chinese women here to see a western man’s thoughts and feelings of love. It is so vivid.

I look forward to reading your next chapters of your story. (coffee)

#2014-01-03 23:22:37 by Jennifercc42 @Jennifercc42

@lmi
Yes, your understanding very correct and thank you for your blessing!
also Wish you happiness!
I found the person who belongs to me. he is really a good man.
So I can understand your articles and moved.In fact, life really have a lot of let we touched of things, we are looking forward to a good result, though sometimes the result is not what we are looking forward to, we still need to cherish and move things happened in our life.Sometimes there are some things we are even willing to experience again.:)

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