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Imi was born and raised in Europe, Hungary. After finishing his school years, he moved to Canada to search for a better life. He lived in Toronto for 13 years and currently resides in Vancouver. He is a romantic at heart with a strong desire to always do the right thing. He would like to give hope to the Chinese and Asian ladies with his story and send a message that love eventually finds everybody.
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My Love for Lily 我对百合的爱, Part 14 - No Paradise with Man! 有男人就不会有天堂    

By Imi
3565 Views | 9 Comments | 6/18/2014 3:32:15 PM

Seeking paradise with a Chinese woman, will it come to be?

After lunch, we started to get ready to go back to Shenzhen to meet with Sally for the weekend. I saw Lily and Mandy talking about something and they told me that, with Jeff helping them in translation, Jeff and Mandy will stay in Yangjiang for another 2-3 days, Lily and I will go to Shenzhen only, to meet with Sally. I was surprised, but it gave me the chance to talk to her about my plan.



We had 4-5 hours of drive ahead of us, 4-5 hours of being with her in a car and talk. Her English improved a lot and we were able to communicate very well. Before my travel to China, she told me all about the Seattle trip and said, she was sorry for not calling me and promised, if next time she came to Seattle she would. She also told me that she loved Seattle and was happy because Mandy's friend had talked to her in English during the entire trip. 



“Why did you let me to come to see you again, when you told me that in May, when we broke up, you never wanted to see me again?” I started out bluntly in the car.



“We are still friends and you wanted to travel to China, I can't tell you not to come.”



“But you know that my feelings for you are not based on friendship. My feelings for you are on a much deeper level.”said to her.



“I told you before you came here, not to talk about this and you promised to do so. Why are we talking about this now?”



“Did you really think that I travelled 10000km, just to be here and I wouldn't talk about this? You were in my head everyday, you meant something to me. At least give me the chance to talk...”



“I don't want to talk. We go to Shenzhen, you can talk to Sally.” She was angry, but so was I.



I was looking out the side window, thinking.“ Why did you come here? She will never let you back into her life. She is afraid of you because you turned into a nobody! You have nothing but love for her. That is not enough, she has a son to think about. You met with her in the wrong time, you are broke. This is not your time!” The negative thoughts were pouring into my head.



I was ready to give up on my plan. After 30-40 minutes without a word between us, I turned to her and said.



“I am sorry Lily, I will not talk to you about this anymore!”



“No. I am sorry because you came here for nothing!”she said.



“Let's just enjoy the trip and the rest of my stay!” suggested to her.



She put some music on. After awhile, I began to feel better. The music brought back the memories from my first visit. I could stop myself not talking to her about us, but I couldn't stop my feelings to come back to me. I was happy sitting next to her in the car and listening Chinese songs. A song came on, that I knew from my previous trip.



“I like this song!”said to her.



“Me too, but this is my favourite.” She said after the song stopped and put another song on.



It was a Chinese love song, I remembered this one too. The singer was male and the song was very heartfelt. She started to sing along with the singer. I felt happy and sad at the same time. It reminded me of the lonely nights in my room, thinking about my beautiful Chinese woman in the dark, crying inside.



I was looking at the scenery from the side window and couldn't stop myself being emotional. I was trying to hold my tears back while she was singing. What a sad, but beautiful feeling it was!



“I love music!” she said when the song finally stopped. “ Music is my friend. I listen to music everyday when I go to bed.”



“So, you think, you can't love a man, only music?” I teased her.



“Men are bad, they hurt me.”



“Some of them maybe, but not every man is the same, and also, a man can give you a different kind of happiness.”



“No! Music is the best happiness I can get.”



“Okay, then try to imagine that you are listening to your favourite music in a man's arms!”I said.



“No man, just music.”she said, and we started laughing.



“Lily, a good man can give you happiness and if you used all of your senses at the same time that would be the best happiness you could get.” I said to her.



“I don't understand.”



“For example, if you and I were married. Try to imagine, it's night time, you listen to your favourite music with me, you look at me as I hold you in my arms, I taste your lips with mine, we touch each other, smell each other. You feel that my body became alive and I feel that your body responds to mine. We are both alive and become one. That is perfect happiness. That is Paradise.” I tried to convince her.



“No Paradise with man!” she said with a giggle in her voice.



We burst into laughs.



We reached Shenzhen , and after we had dinner with Sally in a restaurant we headed to Lily's home. Lily went to take a shower, Sally and I went for a walk in Lotus park. Sally was very busy with her work and she had only the weekend off. She said, she made good money that week and she was happy. She was young, only 24 at that time and very smart. She asked me if I wanted her to translate anything for Lily.



“Yes, I did, but not anymore.”



“Why not?” She asked.



“Lily doesn't want me to talk about us with her anymore.”



“Okay, tell me what you wanted to say to her.”



I told her about my plan.



“I want to work for 2 years very hard until I saved up the money that I lost. After 2 years, I want to get married with her. After that we need to do the immigration papers. That means, they can't come right away to live with me after we got married. I want to support them financially from Canada until they can. I really want Jeff to start his college years in Canada. I would like it if Lily could give me these 2 years and wait for me. Basically, that's it. I want them in my life and to have a good marriage and live a happy family life.”



“Okay, I will tell this to her. Don't worry, I know her, she will listen to me.” she said.



午饭后,我们准备回深圳过周末,Sally会加入。Mandy和Lily好像在讨论什么,然后Jeff给翻译了,Jeff和Mandy会继续留在阳江两三天,我和Lily单独回深圳。我很惊喜,这意味着我有机会跟Lily说说我的两年计划,四五个小时的车程,足够我们说的。她的英语提高了很多,我们基本可以正常交流,她之前跟我说了西雅图的旅行,说那些天Mandy的朋友一直跟她用英语讲话来着。



“我们分手后,你说过不想再见到我了,为什么这次又让我来看你了呢?”在车里,我以这个开场了。



“我们是朋友啊,你说要来,我不能不让你来。”



“但是你很清楚,我对你的感情并不是朋友间的友谊,我想要的并不是跟你做朋友。”



“你来中国前,我已经跟你申明了,我们只做朋友,不会再多谈你我。你当时答应了,为什么现在又要说呢?”



“你真的认为,我不远万里飞来,就是为了跟你做朋友吗?我每天都在想念你,你对我很重要,请再给我一次机会吧。”



“我不想谈,我们回深圳,到时候如果真要说,就跟Sally说吧。”她有些生气,我也是。



我看着窗外,不禁自问,“你为什么来这里?她不可能让你走进她的生活。你现在什么都不是,她根本不在乎你!除了对她的爱,你一无所有,她有儿子,不能仅靠你的爱来生活。你已经完蛋了,你不该在这个时候遇见她!”我已经被消极的情绪打败了。



好吧,我决定不再讲我所谓的两年计划,我放弃了。很长时间我们没有讲话,三四十分钟后,我转回头对她说,“对不起,Lily,我不会再对你说什么了。”



“说对不起的应该是我,我让你白跑一趟。”



“我们就好好享受这段路程和我在这剩下的两天吧。”



她打开音乐,我感觉就好多了,音乐又带回我第一次来这里的记忆。我可以制止自己不再说有关我和她,但却没法制止记忆的回涌,坐在她的旁边,听着优美的中国音乐,惬意极了。



一首熟悉的歌曲开始播放,我说我喜欢这首歌。



“我也喜欢,这是我最喜欢的一首歌。”这首歌播完后,另一首开始了。



是一首中文情歌,我也记得,歌手的声音让人动容。她跟着哼唱,我感觉很轻松但同时有些伤感,这让我想起了那些孤独的夜晚,我在房间里,黑暗中听着这些歌曲,想着她,内心流着泪。



我看着窗外的景色,努力止住要留出的眼泪,她仍在轻声跟着音乐哼唱,这一幕,在我想来,浪漫又忧伤。



“我爱音乐!”那首歌播完后,她说,“音乐是我最好的朋友,每天睡觉前,我都要听听音乐.



“那么,你可以只爱音乐,不爱男人?”我逗她。



“男人都很坏,总是伤害我。”



“有些男人很坏,但不是所有男人都一个样子。男人可以带给你另一种幸福。”



“不可能,只有音乐可以给我幸福。”



“那么,设想一下,在一个男人的怀抱里,听你最喜欢的音乐。”



“不要男人,只有音乐。”她争到,我俩都笑了。



“Lily,一个好男人可以带给你快乐,除了音乐给你精神的愉悦,你还可以得到更美妙的幸福。”



“我没听懂。”



“比如,你和我结婚了,在一个美丽的夜晚,房间里放着你最喜欢的音乐,你看着我的眼睛,我拥你入怀,我亲吻你的香唇,我们触摸彼此的肌肤,沐浴在彼此的气息里。我们的身体为彼此而激动,我们融入彼此,合二为一。那是最完美的幸福,是天堂般的生活。”我试着说服她。



“有男人就没有天堂!”她争辩道,并咯咯笑了。



我也笑了。



在饭店和Sally一起吃了晚饭,然后到了Lily家。Lily在洗澡,我就和Sally一起下楼散步。Sally平时工作很忙,只在周末才能休息,她找到一份很好的工作,薪水不错,可以看出她很快乐,这是个24岁的女孩,年轻又聪明。她问我有没有什么话想让她转达Lily。



“原来有,现在不了。”



“为什么不?”



“Lily不想再谈论我们之间的事了。”



“那你说说看。”



然后我告诉她我所想的两年计划。



“我想拼命工作两年,我会挣回所失去的那笔钱。两年后,我想跟她结婚,然后我们开始办理移民手续。这意味着,我们结婚后她和Jeff不能马上就跟我生活在一起,但我会在加拿大给他们经济上的支持,我想Jeff能在加拿大上大学。我希望Lily能等我两年,这就是我想说的,我希望我的生活里有她,跟她在一起,我们会是幸福的一家人。”



“好的,我会告诉她。你别难过,我了解她,她会听我的。”


Copyright owned jointly by Author and CyberCupid Co., Ltd. Breach of copyright will be prosecuted.
Comments
(Showing 1 to 9 of 9) 1
#2014-06-18 15:46:36 by JohnAbbot @JohnAbbot

Imi, to be honest, I think for a couple of posts you kind of strayed from the love story somehow, but to me this post brings it right back into play. I for one am back wondering does Lily or doesn't she become Imi's lifemate?

But of course that may or may not be much of a cliffhanger depending on whether or not the rumors of you having found someone of interest on CLM are true. But now we just have two open questions and both are hanging from the same cliff. (clap)

Ladies, I highly recommend that you search the meaning of "cliffhanger" if you don't understand it. This is a pretty cool word to know, and if you can use it in the right time and place, Western guys heads are going to turn. If my memory serves me, it originates from the early days of movies in America. But maybe that's just where it became popularized. (Look up popularized too (rofl).

A very good read Imi.

#2014-06-20 11:34:03 by aussieghump @aussieghump

Prefer the chest!

#2014-06-20 20:59:15 by prana @prana

Sighing!(shake)

#2014-06-20 21:09:47 by HZDX6167 @HZDX6167

呵呵,据说天堂没有性别,所以大家都相安无事。(rofl)

#2014-06-20 23:16:09 by anonymous10592 @anonymous10592

haha ,me too, more hairy chest photos? (giggle)

#2014-06-21 19:40:09 by prana @prana

Your stories,let me suddenly remembered a song:

Men Kuba is not a crime of

In the time I was a boy
The people around that can not shed tears
After I matured
On the mirror that I can not regret it
Hovering in a range of non-stop
Heart is in the continuous cycle of lifeline
Who insisted on day and night sleep mask
I am physically and mentally exhausted
Obviously in tears when the
They forget how to weep the eyes
Obviously regret the time
Hearts how to forget regret
I am tired of invisible pressure presses
Began to feel a little breathing can not do anything
Slowly remove the defense
Slowly slowly tears regret
Men Kuba Kuba Kuba is not a crime of
Another strong people have the right to fatigue
Behind the smile, if only heartbreak
Why should a man startled so embarrassed
Men Kuba Kuba Kuba is not a crime of
To taste the taste of tears after an absence of long -
Even if the rain is also a kind of beauty
Better to take advantage of this opportunity
Cried back
Is not a crime
在我年少的时候
身边的人说不可以流泪
在我成熟了以后
对镜子说我不可以后悔
在一个范围不停的徘徊
心在生命线上不断的轮回
人在日日夜夜撑著面具睡
我心力交瘁
明明流泪的时候
却忘了眼睛怎样去流泪
明明后悔的时候
却忘了心里怎样去后悔
无形的压力压得我好累
开始觉得呼吸有一点难为
开始慢慢卸下防卫
慢慢后悔 慢慢流泪
男人哭吧哭吧哭吧 不是罪
再强的人也有权利去疲惫
微笑背后若只剩心碎
做人何必惊得那么狼狈
男人哭吧哭吧哭吧 不是罪
尝尝阔别已久眼泪的滋味
就算下雨也是一种美
不如好好把握这个机会
痛哭一回
明明流泪的时候
却忘了眼睛怎样去流泪
明明后悔的时候
却忘了心里怎样去后悔
无形的压力压得我好累
开始觉得呼吸有一点难为
开始慢慢卸下防卫
慢慢后悔 慢慢流泪
男人哭吧哭吧哭吧 不是罪
再强的人也有权利去疲惫
微笑背后若只剩心碎
做人何必惊得那么狼狈
男人哭吧哭吧哭吧 不是罪
尝尝阔别已久眼泪的滋味
就算下雨也是一种美
不如好好把握这个机会
痛哭一回
不是罪
男人哭吧哭吧哭吧 不是罪
再强的人也有权利去疲惫
微笑背后若只剩心碎
做人何必惊得那么狼狈
男人哭吧哭吧哭吧 不是罪
尝尝阔别已久眼泪的滋味
就算下雨也是一种美
不如好好把握这个机会
痛哭一回………………

#2014-06-22 12:07:11 by weiming @weiming

If you really need 2 years of time, you should talk about to get married again after 2 years but not now, you describe to her how wonderful the future, but unreachable, only make her sad. Why don't you determine the heart, to face the problems and the future together?

#2014-06-23 20:36:21 by paulfox1 @paulfox1

@imi
This has to be the most BORING post yet !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We all look forward to your episodes my friend, but this one had me sticking pins in my eyes

If all this happened 2 years ago, how can you remember the conversations so vividly?

I cant remember what I ate for dinner 2 nights ago!

#2014-11-24 13:12:42 by cffy6985 @cffy6985

男人和女人之间的爱,需要承诺,更需要实际的行动。两年的承诺说长也不算长,说短也不算短,没有人能确保两年后的结果。所以,还是把握当下最为重要。爱需要执着,但也要学会放手。真正的爱是两情相悦的,不需要去乞求。希望你能找到自己的爱,自己的幸福!

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