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我出世在一个美丽的国家,经历了动荡的时代和历史的变迁,终于回到了祖国。当岁月积淀女人的智慧与理性,我终于剥下华丽与虚荣,学会积累生活和人生的体悟,我在这里与大家分享生活的心灵感悟,感悟人生的真谛。I was born in a beautiful country, Vietnam, and lived through the turbulent era and the history of changes, then finally returned to the Mother China. With years of accumulated wisdom and feminine rationality,I finally peeled off the gorgeous and vanity. I am here to share with you inspiration, love, hope and thankfulness and their role in understanding the depth and true meaning of life.
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Love makes me so lonely    

By Xin73
7116 Views | 22 Comments | 9/25/2012 1:44:29 PM

Love makes me so lonely
Preface:The Mid-Autumn Festival, No longer pin ,but sent sentence,in order to express my heart:At this point do not hear each other,may follow the moonlight to shine over you.

Some say: woman such as flower, lonely like a dream.

My heart inexplicable pain up, have a such words: "the lonely person is always remember in heart in his life appeared every a person, so I always get enough to think of you, in every falling stars at night, over and over again, the number of my loneliness ". I once fantasy, in my adrift on the way, a certain period on a certain day, met you, is that you give me a warm vision , let me be with you, one's whole life. But in the life that person, really exist?

The love of this world, was originally a mundane world catastrophe, like as the living Buddha tsangyang gyatso of muttering:" the first best not to meet, so do not be in love. the second best don't know, so cannot miss." Acacia to the marrow , only the hearts of winding, can't forget. always longing for love to come, but when love comes, the but again be defeated and flee. then too late to repent , want to go back. but, sometimes, the passage of time back, often become a kind of disturb.

Love a person how bitter? Only oneself most clearly, a person not lonely, miss a talent lonely...... solitude of the person prone to hallucinations, I was also the case, often attempt to taste to what, but those fascinating tender feeling disappear so fast. in not warm intoxicated before has lost its , taste is less than what the details. All I can remember is less and less, but I know those are once ever true, because my heart always seeming to be and not to be convulsions, the eye always is a warm current buried, but now the rest of the only fuzzy unbearable memory and I lightly smile.

When did I become even I myself do not know yourself? Whether during the day's have an icy manner, the soul has been crying in the night. I trying very hard to smile, try very hard to belie inner loneliness, but I know smile cannot take away the lonely. People often say, Deep love to lonely, love to the poor to the vicissitudes of life. the two still save gasp words remain be a survivor of a disaster of burnout, also has the life for the future of earnestly exhort for preach.When the separation has become a necessity, I still stubbornly want to find forever. Seemed to be in need of a true love is surrounded by at the same time, I need a spiritual sustenance, A dream sincere soul, but I was lost in reality.The so-called soul whether yourself essence? I have little doubt that, at least now I'm not sure.

I fantasized about a warm haven, no matter how far away the time and space can not block, can my heart in shore place. It was a night in numerous give me happy time home, that is a remain me good memories of the heaven.
not long after,my dream of heaven became my thoughts of sadness, because the sadness, I put the tears flow thousands of miles away for the love voyage; because of this sadness, I take to beautiful after the sadness stay in that dream of paradise; because the sadness, I am lonely heart again not found find landing place.

Tonight, miss affect my steps through the trinidad time, to go the records a lot of my happy place, just want to quietly look at me worry about friends, with sweet memories drive away my sadness.
In this night is deep moment, a such as I am lonely figure sitting in a corner, I don't know, in this we together have good memories of the heaven, at this time whether your heart and my same lonely, whether and I am same let the thoughts of flying; miss a faraway friends,And your miss are also like me ,some sad? A pair of spaced distant friends, surely there will be some sort of empathy induction?

I don't want to put my sadness transitive to you, I hope everything can be like what I expected, only makes you happy, I will appear in front of you. The sad feeling is left alone to enjoy the best, I don't want to share with others. Lonely night, lonely me, a lonely heart, filled the air around me are scary dark.
In the lonely I found the years lonely, even if the the night deeper and heavier.will the most abundant emotion, will be the most bone-deep pursuit, will be the most brilliant dream, wil lbe the most thorough catharsis,together into the most painful loneliness and lonely, bear the be remembered with deep gratitude of torment. to possess this precious rare feelings.

in the still of the night,I look up for aery starry sky, in the lonely like the water moonlight,do not know that the moon whether like me loneliness ? At this time I sense of a kind of want and bright moon have a drink together of impulse ! I stood at the window, night wind blows over my face, that carry the cold autumn wind, melt into refers to flip between the word, each solidified into tears. At the moment I was the helpless, loneliness and lonely surrounded. the silence of the night, miss and sad to stare at each other, and you just like a temptation, not say a word to let me to miss you, even if in my emotion ruins, the rest are all some rubble cubeba injury.In this deeply shallow imprinting, the projection is my persistent shadow of the larvae alone. At the moment I just want to tell you, I have been in a distant place watch for you.

Life like fireworks loneliness, the loneliness of life like a cloud. Maybe love can last forever. but the confidante, already tired of struggling Acacia torture. Tonight is a difficult to sleep at night,when I try to alcohol paralysis sank dreamland, Across time and space and I miss the people to meet ,lonely to eventually be dispelled......



Write to: At 02:40 am. 22/09/2012


爱让我如此寂寞
题记:中秋佳节,无以为寄,但送此句,以表吾心:此时相望不相闻,愿逐月华流照君。

有人说:女人如花,寂寞似梦。

我的心莫名的痛起来,有一段这样的话:“寂寞的人总是会用心记住在他生命中出现过的每一个人,所以我总是意犹未尽地想起你,在每个星星坠落的晚上,一遍一遍,数我的寂寞”。我曾经幻想,在我漂泊的路上,某年某月某一天,邂逅了你,是你给我一个温暖的眼神,让我与你同行,一生一世。而生命中的那个人,真的存在吗?

这世间的爱恋,原本就是一场红尘的劫难,如同活佛仓央嘉措的呢喃:“第一最好不相见,如此便可不相恋。第二最好不相知,如此便可不相思”。相思入骨,只能把心缠绕,无法忘记。总渴望爱情能够降临,但是当爱情来临的时候,却又落荒而逃,尔后又追悔莫及,想回头。可是,有时候,那些时过境迁的回头,往往会成为一种打扰。

爱一个人有多苦?只有自己最清楚,一个人不寂寞,想一个人才寂寞。。。。。。寂寥的人容易产生幻觉,我亦如此,常常企图品味到些什么,但是那些醉人的温情消失得那么快,在没被温馨陶醉之前就已经失去了,品味不到细节的东西。我所能回忆的也就越来越少,可是我知道那些都是曾经真实过的,因为心总会似有似无的抽搐,眼睛总是被一股暖流掩埋,可是如今所剩下的只有模糊不堪的记忆和我淡然的微笑。

我什么时候变得连我自己都看不清楚自己了呢?无论白天的冷若冰霜,灵魂却一直在黑夜里哭泣。我拼命的微笑,努力去掩饰内心深处的寂寞,可是我知道微笑无法带走寂寞。人们常说,情到深处人孤独,爱至穷时尽沧桑。这两句尚存喘息的话语残留着劫后余生的倦怠,也有着饱尝生命对未来希冀的谆谆劝诫。当分离已经成为必然的时候,我依然固执地想从中寻找到永远。似乎在需要得到一个被真爱包围的同时,我更需要一个精神的寄托,一个梦想中真诚的灵魂,然而我却在现实中迷失了。那所谓的灵魂是否是自己的本质所在呢?我有点怀疑,至少我现在不能确定。

我幻想有一个温馨的港湾,无论时空多么遥远也不能阻隔,可以将我的心靠岸的地方,那是一个在无数夜晚给我欢乐时光的家园,那是一个给我留下美好回忆的天堂。
曾几何时,我的梦中天堂却变成了我思念中的忧伤,因为这份忧伤,我把眼泪流在千里之外为爱远航;因为这份忧伤,我把美丽过后的悲哀留在了那个梦中的天堂;因为这份忧伤,我孤独的心却再也找不到靠岸的地方。

今夜,思念牵动我的脚步穿越了千里时空,去到这个记载了我许多欢乐,只想默默地看一眼我牵挂的朋友,用甜蜜的回忆驱赶走忧伤。
在这个夜已深沉的时刻,一个如我一样孤单的身影独坐一隅,我不知道,在这个我们共同拥有美好回忆的天堂里,此时的你内心是否和我一样感到孤独,是否和我一样任思绪飞扬,思念着一个远方的朋友,而你的思念是否也和我一样,有些忧伤?一对相隔遥远的朋友,想必都会有某种心灵相通的感应吧?

我不想把我的忧伤传递给你,我希望一切可以如我所期盼的那样,只有在能带给你快乐的时候,我才会出现在你的面前。忧伤的感觉是留给孤独的人的最好享受,我不希望与别人分享。孤独的夜,孤独的我,孤独的心,弥漫在我四周的是可怕的黑暗。
在孤寂中我发现岁月的寂寞,即使黑夜更深重了。将最丰富的情感,将最刻骨的追求,将最辉煌的梦想,将最彻底的剖白,一并融入到最痛苦的孤独寂寞之中,承受着那刻骨铭心的煎熬,拥有了这份珍贵难得的情怀。

夜阑人静,我仰望飘渺的星空,在如水寂寞的月光下,不知那轮明月是否如我一样孤单?此时的我莫名的有一种想要与明月对饮的冲动!我站立在窗前,夜风吹过我的脸,那带着寒气的秋风,化作指间翻转的文字,凝固成一颗颗泪滴。此时此刻的我被无助,孤独和寂寞包围着。寂静的长夜里,思念和感伤相互凝望,而你仿如一种诱惑,一言不发地让我去想你,哪怕我的情感废墟里,剩下的全是一些瓦砾苍伤。在这深深浅浅的印迹中,投映的是我那执着的孑孓独影。此刻我只想悄悄告诉你,我一直在遥远的地方守候着你。

生命寂寞如烟花,人生孤独似云月。也许爱情可以永恒。但红颜,已经累于苦苦相思的折磨。今夜又是一个难以入眠之夜,当我试着以酒精麻痹而沉入梦乡,穿越了时空与思念的人相会,寂寞才终被驱散、、、、、、

草于2012年9月22日凌晨02:40

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(Showing 1 to 10 of 22) 1 2 3 More...
#2012-09-25 17:12:41 by kasey @kasey

你的文章很美,可是还是不要太忧伤吧,一个人的月光有着凄清的美,这种美真是沁浸心髓。现在真是到了不想过节的时段,但该来的总是要来,于是收拾起寂寞的心,让寂寞随着清月洒向每一个角落,让爱、让平静伴随每一个美丽的灵魂......

#2012-09-26 11:22:33 by qdphoebe @qdphoebe

写得太好了,你是一个感情多么细腻丰富的人啊,跟你有同样的感受,原来孤独也可以这样让人欲罢不能。

#2012-09-26 11:27:45 by aussieghump @aussieghump

Life is indeed lonely at 3am in the morning - when Love is running around someplace else!

#2012-09-26 23:48:57 by xin73 @xin73

to Gareth:
In the sleepless night,Lonely secretly attacked me ,empty and silent and quiet for many people listen to and enjoy. Lively Ulmer sensual ,cannot resist my inner loneliness and emptiness, And there's just no sounds in the environment,Maybe I can experience a kind of such as poetry the same feeling.

#2012-09-27 20:29:04 by xin73 @xin73

Hi kasey&qdphoebe
感谢你们阅读和欣赏我的文章。
是他促成我写作的灵感,每一次我们之间产生误会导致彼此间的痛苦折磨。当爱感到疲惫想放弃的时候真的没有想象中那么潇洒。所以我感觉爱上一个人就等于爱上了寂寞。生命是徇烂多彩的,而寂寞就是生命中的一道风景,懂得寂寞真正含义的人,才能拥有属于自己的春天。整日沉溺于灯影酒欢中的人永远体会不到寂寞的独特滋味。但是,寂寞带来的心灵深处的种种惬意不是触手可及的,它需要你去争取,去认真领悟,在寂寞之中思索生命的真谛,品味生活的味道,你就能寻找到人生真正的归宿。
孤独看似是个很伤感的字眼,但是你如果细细体会就可以发现,孤独似一种人生境界,是上帝的恩赐。孤独旅行,可以让你脱离时间的桎梏,奔放于外,还可以让你替自己的心找到一面镜子,从而使你在孤独中照见自己。有时候孤独寂寞是一种难得的感觉,它让我感觉很美好,让我在寂寥中产生更多的灵感。

#2012-09-30 08:55:28 by jonno @jonno

Oh yes, how I loved studying literature! I am remembering now how much i shunned sonnets, however, and i understand that i really need to avoid stuff like this too. I do know myself. But i began to look closely at that well intended, slightly ((-:) exaggerated, superimposed doohickey of an image capturing this wondrous work. For it alone told me loudly and clearly that i should not delve further, and just let it go. I never really understood the word "photoshop". Another internet term now comes to mind: "poemshop ". Or how about wordshop, literatureshop, or novelshop? Workshop? But i did make it through the piece, though 3/4 of the way i wanted to run to that same open, "cold autumn night window" and hurl profusely.

I am talking more to my western buds here, and i am sincerely hoping that my allusive language is making translation difficult for our beautiful Asian friends, because i don't want to offend. Nor do i feel that even the most exact of translation is going to help me come to grips with this piece, but alas, it is not important that i do, for it is the former to whom my fellow western travelers and i still doth seek. Yet, I think i can speak for guys in general when i say that we do not appreciate love as do women. Ornate is fine, but when i hear melodrama spew from my mate it is enough to make me lose my woody permanently. I thus find it difficult to distinguish this love poem from a requiem. Depression, loneliness, pain, and bone-deep, catastrophic darkness? Is she missing her sweetheart, or suffering in the aftermath of a devastating tsunami?

i begged my wife to go SOMEWHERE in those first couple years of marriage. I was so relieved when she starting making friends. The time alone proved to be beneficial for my sanity. We are now divorcing and that does hurt. Yes, love hurts, but are we to avoid meeting or knowing lovers altogether? Alas, I wish again to try my hand at love. So, please, i pray thee toss those flowers aside for now, and try to understand what love means for man, for love's sake! for if you try to affix love to "paradise" you shall inflict pain on thee when it doth fall short. (-:

p.s. I do remember one sonnet i did appreciate where Shakespeare is able to step back from the rest of the groveling wussies and grow a spine:


SONNET 130
My mistress' eyes are nothing like the sun;
Coral is far more red than her lips' red;
If snow be white, why then her breasts are dun;
If hairs be wires, black wires grow on her head.
I have seen roses damask'd, red and white,
But no such roses see I in her cheeks;
And in some perfumes is there more delight
Than in the breath that from my mistress reeks.
I love to hear her speak, yet well I know
That music hath a far more pleasing sound;
I grant I never saw a goddess go;
My mistress, when she walks, treads on the ground:
And yet, by heaven, I think my love as rare
As any she belied with false compare.

#2012-10-01 12:43:21 by drunkblue12 @drunkblue12

真的很喜欢你的文章,昨晚我独自举杯望月时仿佛看到了你美丽的寂寞。今日灿烂阳光下愿你的爱不再让你等待。

#2012-10-01 13:09:01 by sara1202 @sara1202

孤独是灵魂的升华。

每个人都是一个孤独的个体,然而,懂得欣赏孤独和体味孤独的人,虽凄清尤高洁。

每一个人都在孤独,仅仅,只不过是以怎样的方式对待孤独。孤独,是生命赋予我们最大的恩惠;孤独,人性的超脱。

#2012-10-02 17:36:34 by xin73 @xin73

Hi jonno :Thank you comments.When you love someone, somewhere in time feel lonely.As for heaven is the word, I was using in the special sentence adjective.Chinese text is abstruse, meaning is wide,Translated into English may let you feel is another meaning.But never mind, if you don't understand, feel free to ask me.
Thank you for share Shakespeare's poetry.

#2012-10-03 14:56:00 by xin73 @xin73

Hi sara1202 & sara1202
感谢你们的阅读和理解。
sara1202 :心灵的寂寞是一种说不出来的感觉,它不是烦恼,不是痛苦,更不是身体的疼痒饥渴。当心灵感到寂寞的时候,那是一种空荡荡的思绪,没有着落的孤独,找不到归宿的徘回。喧闹的大街上,繁华的高楼林立,盖住了人心灵深处的苦痛,大家都是匆匆忙忙的脚步、浮躁功利的心态、迷茫无助的眼神。人与人之间的心灵距离,使冷漠弥漫于狭窄烦躁的都市生活空间。我们的心灵需要清热解毒,卸下强颜欢笑的面具,自在悠然地回归到淳朴原始的单纯美好。祝愿你在CLM圆寂你的美梦。
sara1202 :好久不见你的作品。我来CLM阅读的第一个博客就是你的《中国女性,你,缺失什么? 》,这篇文章写得非常好,你所有的博客都说出了我想说的话,我很欣赏你的作品,也非常期待你的新作。很久不见你的新作品以为你已找到幸福的归宿离开这里。但我相信聪慧的你绝不会缺少追求者。
是的,孤独寂寞是灵魂的升华!正视寂寞并努力承受,心灵才会在静守中成长,生命才会在沉淀中繁华。而耐不住寂寞的人,生活就像是一座沙子做成的城堡,无论外表多么华美,终究只能化作流沙;而耐得住寂寞的人,他的人生会在日积月累的成长中渐入佳境。生活告诉我们,那些不能忍受寂寞的人,当一切繁华和热闹都退却后,最后反而会成为孤家寡人。
留一份寂寞给生命,为心灵腾出一个宁静的空间,才能反躬自省,感悟生命。老子说:“五色令人目盲,五音令人耳聋,五味令人爽口。”一个生活在喧嚣嘈杂氛围中的人,如果不能心有定力,就容易随波逐流,进而丧失心态和灵魂,人也就变得平庸甚至庸俗。“天下聪明俊秀不少,所以德不加修,业不加广者,只为因循二字耽搁一生”,我们需要摒弃诱惑,抛开喧嚣嘈杂,回归自我,与寂寞为伴,创造自己美好的未来。

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