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Learn Buddhism! Meet Women!    

By Ken Silver About Asia
2747 Views | 0 Comments | 2/16/2011 3:29:14 PM

I was bitching to the Zen Buddhist master about my life. Should I get rid of this person, get rid of that situation? The Zen master laughed. “Get rid of yourself. Then you’ll be happy,”

No way!

My self is my most treasured possession by far! I take it everywhere with me during the day; at night I put slippers on its feet, give it a glass of warm milk, warm pajama’s, and a favorite teddy bear. Then I close the door to its room.

Ah… but I never look too closely or too precisely at my self… and this was the Buddha’s great insight… because if I really looked I would see unused slippers, an untouched glass of milk, folded pajamas, and a lonely teddy bear. And nothing else in that room.

Emotions, thoughts, memories, intellect, etc. etc.. And nothing else in the bright shinning endless space of the mind.

Yes, but what good is Buddhism if it doesn’t help you pick up women? (By the way… don’t be concerned about this “nobody really there” stuff. There’s no swordsman like a Zen swordsman!). Ah, but Buddhism can help you meet beautiful, good hearted women.! Yes, you read my mind! Thai women!

Even the most cynical political observers admit that Thailand is a genuinely Buddhist country. I have read that one third of the common folks’ income goes to supporting the highly “professional army” of Buddhist monk hood. The real military “Makes Buddhist Merit” by protecting the country. His Majesty the King was a Buddhist monk in his younger days, which perhaps accounts for his healing and wise guidance of the country.

There is a Buddhist TV channel and Buddhist perspective columns in newspapers.

There are endless oceans of Buddhist temples throughout the country, the focal point of both religious and social gatherings.

The American Supreme Court would have a fit at the intertwining of Buddhism and Government and Society in Thailand. Eat my monkeys’ shorts, American Supreme Court!

Anyhow, the whole Thai nation goes as one family to temple festival days. And just plain weekends, also. Senior military officers, mom and dad, hot babes, tea stall vendors, bus drivers, all work together to cook and serve communal food. Join them! Thais are not cynical. They will welcome you. You’ll see beautiful statues and paintings. You’ll be revived by the spiritual power of many monks chanting. Sometimes they even serve roast chicken!

And, if you’ve ever wondered at the sensual essence of the expression “the cat licks its lips at the rich saucer of cream”… watch those gorgeous long haired Thai babes gracefully bow before statues of the Buddha.
Speaking of kitties, Thai Buddhist temples serve as open shelters for homeless cats and dogs. Even the coldest son of a bitch gets misty eyes at the sight of the gratitude on an old stray dogs’ face that has finally found some compassion, food, and a place to lie down safely.

Its easy! Feed a dog, make new friends, get phone numbers.

So get out your warmest feelings, your most compassionate thoughts, and mix them together with warm fuzzy memories. Viola! Your instant imaginary self is ready to make new friends at the temple. Which by the way, also performs marriage ceremonies if that grateful dog in that magic space leads you over to the right girl…

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