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Ryan Hendry is a former detective and lawyer from the UK. He is now a freelance writer living in the Philippines. Ryan has a Filipina partner and hopes to be married to her later in 2016. He has traveled extensively in Asia and is a veteran of the Asian online dating world. He has experienced online, and physically met, some scammers, including unscrupulous ladies from Thailand and the more obvious scammers from Nigeria. Ryan is keen therefore to share his experiences and uses this platform for his blogs as CLM and ALM is committed to hunting down all scammers. Ryan, despite some of his experiences, respects Asian culture, loves Asian food and is now happy in the Philippines!
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International Dating: My Story - Dating Asian Women    

By Ryan Hendry
1508 Views | 7 Comments | 3/18/2016 2:51:43 PM

Dating Asian Women. International Dating-My Story

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times ...”

The opening lines in Charles Dickens’ novel, A Tale of Two Cities reads “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair…, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way…”  

 

For any of you unfamiliar with the book it is a story of contrasts and comparisons between London and Paris during the French Revolution in the 18th Century.

 

Fast forward to the 21st Century and this story of mine. It is not a tale of two cities either in a literary or a literal sense. It is about contrasts and comparisons between two cultures, and two continents. It is a tale of any ordinary man born and raised in Britain who eventually found a life partner and soul mate in Asia.

 

That man could be you or me. It could be any western male brought up in Europe or North America. It is a story of love, sorrow, pain, anger, joy, desire, trust, deceit, some humorous moments and eventual contentment. Above all else, it is a story of hope conquering setbacks, and hope vanquishing fear. It is Ryan Hendry’s story.

 

It tells the story of how in my late sixties I came to find true love and happiness in a country on the other side of the world from the one I had known since I was born. Many of you reading this will identify with much of my story. I sincerely hope that it reassures you that there is a special someone for you no matter how many times you have suffered the pain of heartache.

 

My tale starts in Britain and briefly traces my life journey through my working life in England through to my retirement years. Those retirement years took me to Asia where I now live in contentment in the Philippines. My travels in Asia took me to Thailand, Indonesia, Sri Lanka, Laos, Cambodia, Vietnam, Malaysia and of course, the Philippines. My life journey will be a candid account of my failed marriages, all to British women, the failures and successes in dating Asian women. I spent considerable time in Thailand, the Land of Smiles, and I describe how I met a Thai lady online and started to date her; how she scammed me and left me penniless.

 

My time in Thailand was also a time of an introduction to the “bar girl” scene and how I fell hopelessly in love with a Thai bar girl. “Hopelessly”, as there was no future in that relationship and not for the reasons you may think.

 

The setting then returns to England where I seek a place to lick my wounds and mend a broken heart. A stark reality soon sets in that I have no future in Britain, only a past. I know in my heart that I am not ready to get old and curl up to die as a lonely old man. I start dating online once more but this time I try the Philippines and Filipinas. For me, this turned out to be a wise choice. I found what I was looking for, unlike the lyrics of a well-known U2 song.

 

I am a baby boomer. One of those kids born shortly after the end of WW2, a child of the Swinging Sixties and as a Brit (and European) witnessed first-hand the making of history many times over. I lived through and survived the decimalization of the British currency, metrification of weights and distance, the Cold War and its demise, and the invasive tentacles of the European Union reaching into every corner of traditional British life. I witnessed the shambles of successive government immigration policies; the boom and bust cycles; full employment and unemployment; the harsh “hardness” of the Thatcher years; bombs in London and of course, the emergence of fundamental religious fanatics trying to blow up the whole world. Yet, despite the Swinging Sixties I was married at the tender age of 21 to my teenage sweetheart.

 

An easy excuse for my three failed marriages is pressure of work. The truth however is underpinned by the fact that I didn’t know about Asian women, their culture and femininity. I can’t say hand on heart that I was always attracted to Asian women. I was attracted to any good looking lady no matter what color her skin. The Britain of my youth was not the multi-cultural place that it is now. There were no opportunities for me to socialize with women other than white English females.

 

Feminism, particularly the rabid variety, had yet to emerge in my formative years. If I am wrong on that count, then I wasn’t aware of its emergence. Rabid feminism was omitted from my list above of things that I have lived through and survived. It is an ugly feature of western culture and one I am pleased to have left behind. I omit my first wife from this category owing to the fact we were simply too young to marry.

 

But, certainly my third ex, if not of the rabid type, fell into the category of hard core feminist. Like others of her ilk she wanted the best of all worlds. She wanted to be the boss and not solely an equal partner. My money was her money but her earnings were ring-fenced from me. It was my income that paid the mortgage and paid for the worldwide vacations. She was never content. That made two of us. Malcontents both, so it’s no wonder the marriage ended after twenty-five years. This last divorce coincided with me catching travel lust. Note that I preface lust with travel! Why is it that many folks perceive older white guys traveling in Asia as sex-tourists? Some are for sure, but not all and not me.

 

Dare I venture that Charles Dickens could have been writing about my story? I’m joking! My life has had the best of times, the worst of times, occasionally a little wisdom, much foolishness, belief turning to incredulity. It’s had its share of light and darkness; hope springing eternal but dark days of despair were never too distant. The journey was littered with Heaven and Hell moments and some fun too.

 

Join me on this journey.

Copyright owned jointly by Author and CyberCupid Co., Ltd. Breach of copyright will be prosecuted.
Comments
(Showing 1 to 7 of 7) 1
#2016-03-18 14:51:26 by JohnAbbot @JohnAbbot

There are a lot of reasons why I am excited to have Ryan aboard as a new blogger, including the fact that he is an obviously talented writer, but more than anything it is because he is living in the Philippines and doing so with a Filipina who seems destined to be his better half.

I might add that Ryan has assured me that he will stray from this series to pen some individual posts on a variety of other issues than this series focuses on.

Welcome aboard Ryan, I am looking forward in a big way to a valuable education about life and love in the Phils with a Flipina from a western male's POV. Everyhting else you bring to our attention will no doubt also be welcome by all.

#2016-03-18 17:51:42 by Barry1 @Barry1

Thanks for this interesting blog, Ryan.

As I was reading, your life story reminded me of an old piece of wisdom, "think like a man of action, act like a man of thought".

By this I mean that it seems in your early life, you were a go-getter. A mover and a shaker. A man of action.

But in your later years, you've become wiser, more reflective and mature on the myriad mysterious whys and wherefores of the mighty universe surrounding us. A real man of thought, maybe even of epistemic destiny.

I'm now sitting glued to the edge of my seat, waiting for your next absorbing article.

Well done, mate. (clap)

#2016-03-19 00:08:44 by WarmLifeGz7 @WarmLifeGz7

Very well written with intense passion for Life and many experiences ... including shipwrecks ... Although our stories are distinctly different -- but there are more than enough echoes as well... I am full of confidence that many CLM members will surely cherish your continued writing. Many blessings for your life in the Philippines. Welcome to Guangzhou should you ever wish to visit this city. I will be delighted to show you around here . There are definitely many good reasons that Men adore and cherish the women in the Philippines . You are sharing yet another golden reason to do so.

#2016-03-20 18:25:18 by sandy339 @sandy339

Hi Ryan
Thanks also for sharing all these. It is really encouraging…
It is nothing better than we all could talk here and communicate here candidly.
“belief turning to incredulity”? Could you give some examples to explain what it means?

Expecting more blogs!

Have a nice weekend!

#2016-03-21 12:09:10 by RHendry @RHendry

@sandy339 Thanks for the comments. For examples of "belief turning to incredulity", I am sorry to say you will have to follow my blog.:)

#2016-03-21 12:10:28 by RHendry @RHendry

Thanks to all for the warm welcome and kind comments!

#2016-05-09 03:57:00 by good88person @good88person

@RHendry

Charles Dickens wrote “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times ........ "

I am NOT reading that book
..... because .....
Dickens cannot make up his mind ! Ha ! Ha ! LOL ( Laugh Out Loud ) !

"What the Dickens" ........ is he going on about ! Ha ! Ha ! LOL !

I am a 60 year old Chinese man ........ with a very "dry" sense of English humour !

-------------------------------------------------------------

Ryan wrote
"bombs in London and of course, the emergence of fundamental religious fanatics trying to blow up the whole world."

Are you talking about ........
1. Muslim terrorist bombs
or
2. Christian terrorist bombs of the IRA ( Irish Republican Army )
or
3. Christian Crusades = Christian "Holy War" against the Muslims in the 11th century
or
4. Christian Spanish Inquisition

The INSANITY OF THE SITUATION is ........
ALL of the Christians Catholics , Christian Protestants , Muslims and Jews
are praying to the SAME GOD
and
ALL of them believe in the "Ten Commandments" and "THOU SHALL NOT KILL".

There is a huge argument about
which "MESSENGER OF GOD" ( Prophet ) to follow ,
but ........
that is a stupid reason ... to kill one another.

“O Lord ! What crimes are committed in thy name !”

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