Chinese Women, Asian Women, Online Dating & Things Chinese and Asian
Lily, originally from Sichuan province (home of spicy food), has lived in Zhejiang province since 2007. She has over 10 years of work experience in international companies in Shenzhen, using English daily; thus having a relatively good command of English. An honest, caring, communicative, appreciative and positive person, Lily enjoys reading, thinking, learning, listening music, nature & dogs. Continuous learning and self-improvement is her life-time goal. She will blog about: keeping a positive outlook on people, things and life; the importance of maintaining good-balance in all aspects of life; Know yourself and what you want before searching for and finding the one most suitable for you. Lily hopes to share her knowledge with others while also learning from them.
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How Your Thinking, Speaking and Behaving Influences Yourself, Others and the World    

By Lily
2777 Views | 9 Comments | 9/7/2014 5:22:22 AM

Every moment, everyone of us in the planet has been influencing ourselves, others around & the world through our heart, mouth & behaviors and also being influenced at the same time. Then what we are thinking in head, speaking through mouth and behaving are very important for us, others and the world. Different thinking, speaking and behaving generate a different mindset, habit, personality, destiny and world. Thoughts & thinking is like seed, speaking & behaving is like all elements requested during the cultivation and the final result or fact is the flower or fruit of the plant. What you have planted, paid, you will reap the exactly same in the end. It says ”as you sow, so you will reap”.

Each person is an energy magnet who has been constantly emitting or absorbing all kinds of positive or negative energy. This is where those of our different feelings or emotions like happiness, joy, sadness, disappoint, frustration comes from. Same like magnetization, each of us has been constantly being magnetized by others around until we block or keep ourselves away from those persons. It says” Touch pitch, and you will be defiled”. When we get close and to be with those positive persons, we will be positively influenced or magnetized. Vice versa. 

Basing on above, knowing what type of energy magnet we are and the persons we are with are very crucial for us. First, when you or those persons intends to think, speak and behave negatively, you and those persons will work as a negative energy magnet for other persons around and you will constantly emitting negative energy and absorbing positive energy from other persons around. Correspondingly, less qualified or positive person would like to get close or be with you or those persons. Constant or continuous complaint, putting down, mocking, belittle, irony, criticizing are negativities; Appreciation, affirmation, compliments, encouraging are positive instead. These could help us to tell those negative energy persons apart from positive ones. Distinguishing and selective abilities are important for us under this situation. After that, we should try our best not be influenced by or keep away from those negative energy person and more be with those positive energy person. We can’t change others but we still can choose who we could be with.

Head, mouth and whole physical body works like three valves of the energy flowing or spreading. The energy flow or spreading can be blocked by any of the three valves. For example, when we only think something in our head but don’t speak it out and take it into real action, the positive or negative influence to others around will not occur. The negative or positive influence will be occurred and aggravated after speaking and action. Basing on this, mouth seems a very important valve during the whole energy flowing or spreading. Tight lip and slowing pace speaking can strengthen mouth valve function. When you are a loose lip and fast speaking person, you may find it is a lot difficult for you to keep your thinking behind the mouth and the only way is try best to be aware and present on every single thinking moment as possible as you can. Only if you are successful on being aware and present, immediate activation of the blocking function of your mouth will be possible and comparative easier to achieve.

When we face or are in front of the innocent child, we particularly should pay highly attention on what we are speaking & behaving. Arguing, fighting, complaining, threatening, denying, putting down, mocking, irony should be absolutely avoided for a responsible parent or adult. For improvement of some negative energy flowing or spreading, you can try first aim at successful blocking on the behaving, then for speaking & last for thinking respectively. Gradually, you will find you are more and more positive on your thinking, speaking and behaving. During this process, you are not only healing & remolding yourself but also positively influencing others around and help to rebuild a higher quality of living environment accordingly.

Above we mainly talk about how the human being is influencing and influenced each other, the same positive or negative influence also exist between human being & other creatures, environment or nature. Basing on this, we still need try our best to minimize & avoid any negative behavior to them like over-exploit, waste natural source, slaughter wide animals, pollute or destroy environments and etc. We need to be responsible for not only ourselves but others & the world…   

Copyright owned jointly by Author and CyberCupid Co., Ltd. Breach of copyright will be prosecuted.
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#2014-09-07 05:30:15 by JohnAbbot @JohnAbbot

Lily, your advice in this article is something to be considered by all thinking human beings. However, it is especially on point for those of us involved in or hoping to become involved in a cross cultural relationship. Thanks for an interesting read.

#2014-09-07 07:32:22 by zqy2014 @zqy2014


Hi John, thanks for your posting and give your comment during your busy time... Have a nice weekend and Happy Middle-Autumn Festival! Don't eat too much moon cake...(rofl)

#2014-09-07 09:04:49 by Barry1 @Barry1


What you say is very true, Lily.

If possible, we are all well advised to stay clear of negative people. They say that two things that greatly influence us all in fact, are the people we associate with and the words that we read.

Another negative I believe is the quest for money. People who forever seem to be wanting more, more, more are on the wrong track, I think. They'll never be truly happy as they'll never quite reach the goal that they desire. Because no matter how much they have, it won't be quite enough. It's akin to trying to reach the end of a continually shifting rainbow.

Thanks for your words of wisdom, Lily. (sun)

#2014-09-07 14:02:34 by zqy2014 @zqy2014


Hi Barry, first I have to give my best wishes to you and Tina. I am happy to read your relation has been further stepped and more closer than before. As said, only if we do our best on every thing and we will be lead to the right place. No matter the final result is success or failure, we will harvest our experience and all those past experience will built a different us in today.When facing too many different voices, we need distinguish which is ours and stick to our own. This way will guide you to find the right person in a right way.

Yes, you are right, who we are be with and what we have read will have great influence to us and our life.

Money is the biggest energy magnet which can inspire us to be a successful person but also constantly test our will and erode our soul at the same time. It says “when a thing reaches its extreme, it reverses its course”. We need to be host of the money instead of slave of the money.

Thanks for your supporting, Barry! I wish you a happy ending with Tina,she is a good woman.

#2014-09-07 20:39:39 by ocean58 @ocean58

Hi Lily As usual a great article . I am reminded of something I tell my new young staff and also to some older ones who forget.
We have 2 ears and one mouth ,so we should listen twice before we speak once .

#2014-09-07 21:13:04 by anonymous11718 @anonymous11718

Sympathy for Human conditions

* A man is born
without conscious memory of a choice / decision
with an animal body, including thinking and feeling organs
(Possibly difficult) Family relationships, social life in a complex civilization.

** without knowledge
of one's own karma and karma group
the unseen negative influence energy fields
its identity

** the need
to develop a sense of self and identity
to learn extensive, complicated skills on many levels in order to survive

** with the result that
Elimination of an aspect of self-image that the internal enemy, the attacker, and rebels by incessant self-judgment, remorse, anxiety and guilt

** with the confrontation of
conscious and
unconscious data and energy fields
overwhelming experiences

** a faulty brain
with its built-in mechanism of reward and well-being
with naive, easily programmable software
with immediate implementation of an experience without having to extensively explore
with forgetfulness and the loss of significant data portions

** with the potential of repressed contents painful nature as potential ammunition for
Fear of attack from outside (projection)


Because of the compassion of the desire to understand rather than to condemn. Grows with understanding we see that people actually can not be otherwise than they are at any given moment.

#2014-09-10 08:10:32 by zqy2014 @zqy2014

Thanks for your supporting.Listen twice means make sure we fully understand what the speaker say and intend to express? If yes, I agree with. Sometime, we are too eager to express ours so that seldom be a good listener.

Thanks for your comments.Your words is a little abstract and informative for me to fully understand immediately. I will give my comments in later time. Thanks for your sharing.

#2014-09-11 08:46:44 by ocean58 @ocean58

Hi Lily Yes that is exactly what I mean . We must listen to understand ,not talk to understand .When we fully listen to the other person then we can answer with our true words .Good sales people are not those that talk ,they are good listeners .Same in a relationship ,those with good marriage have good listening skills

#2014-09-11 16:33:13 by zqy2014 @zqy2014


Thanks for your confirmation and further explanation.Yes, I agree listening is the 1st step of communication.Did not get the correct point what the speaker want to say or express, all the following talking and behaving will be pointless for the speaker,then the failure communication occurs. Likewise,don't less asking questions or talk or express self still means problem for a successful communication.So a successful communicator can both listen and express.

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