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Barry from Australia is a questioning soul who looks at social issues from an alternative point of view and instead of asking, “Why?”, he asks “Why not?” He’s convinced that many of his previous incarnations were spent in China. He feels drawn to the people there; attracted by their rich culture and way of life. If given one wish from God, he’d reply, “I want everyone on Earth to be the same colour, speak the same language, and treat each other as they themselves would like to be treated.”
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Dark Shadow of My Life (Part 3)

By Barry Pittman
2354 Views | 179 Comments | 6/24/2018 2:20:07 PM

Anger within me, camouflaged so well

Baleful and brooding, who can tell

Ready to unleash, its time will bide

Better go run, better go hide

Inevitable though, it'll come out

Woe to those, that are about

 

 

This is a continuation from parts 1 and 2 of my anger blog, where I described a period in my life where sudden bursts of inappropriate bad temper would suddenly afflict me. Sullenly simmering deep down, I consequently now possess a disturbing cauldren of bad memories from the period, as I reflect back on this dark shadow of my life, many shameful fragments of which I'm trying hard to forget. I live in hope that one day I'll succeed in doing this.

 

Even more disturbing however, is that I was far from being alone with my anger issues. As previously described, the British Mental Health Organisation found that almost a third of respondents said they had a close friend or family member who had trouble controlling their anger. One in four people worried about how angry they sometimes felt. And one in five admitted they’d ended a relationship or friendship with someone prematurely because of how poorly they'd acted during one or more of their inappropriate bad temper episodes.

 

Disturbingly, two out of every three people either agreed or strongly agreed that both people and the world around them generally, seemed to be getting more angry over time. Society was in a gradual downward spiral, where  placidity and gentleness was becoming an ever rarer commodity.  I guess anger that morphs into rage must form an important component of the long held yet awful, condemnatory truism that man's gross inhumanity to man is both legion and legend. Disgusting stuff, but true.

 

Apart from infuriation and ill temper, let's not even talk about all the distressing greed, suffering and selfishness in the world, the endemic spiritual laceration and malaise, that seems now to be as perennial as the grass, as inevitable as the ebbing tide that flows along the shoreline. Abhorrent stuff indeed. Entire books could be written about these. This article focuses on anger only however, as crucial and compelling as all these other issues are.

 

Someone asked me what the hideous face in the picture at the top of this blog represents. The answer's easy. The grotesqueness of this image represents the ugliness and repugnance of man's depravity and baseness, when primal fears and abominations overwhelm him. Does this gargoyle then represent mankind's natural beastly, aggressive instincts? Ahh, I cannot reveal my thoughts on this now, these may form the topic of a whole new series of disquieting blogs in the future, as fetid and foul as the subject matter is.

 

The frightening statistics in the British study above raise many pivotal questions over a whole diverse spectrum of issues. Reflecting specifically upon matchmaking sites however, since this is where this blog's being kindly published, important points are raised. Does Chinalovematch.net or any other introduction agency, share or feel any responsibility for matching up an innocent lady with a potentially dangerous, ill tempered Western fruitcake who could explode at any tick of the clock?

 

Could a dating agency in fact be potentially sued under possible breach of duty of care provisions? Where a dangerous, violent male nutcase is introduced to a sweet, unsuspecting female? A guileless innocent, so full of hopes and aspirations for a new and better life in the West, who soon could turn up brutally dismembered on the banks of a river somewhere! Okay, I'm exaggerating a little here, but you get my drift.

 

Let's pursue this line of thought, as distasteful as the topic inherently and unfortunately is. Should all dating and introduction agencies across the globe be required to conduct psychological tests on their male members, in order to ensure no one's as nutty as a brimming jar of peanut butter?  If this is asking too much, what about at least a superficial attitudinal assessment be compulsorily performed, where plausibly the worst of the worst could hopefully be identified and expelled, back into the loathesome swamp or stinking cesspit from whence they furtively crawled out from? Put more politely, should the questionable deviant flotsam and jetsam of society be allowed and even encouraged to meet unsuspecting females through an agency such as this?

 

Could Interpol or other national police organisations be asked to check every male who tries to join a dating site? To ensure they weren't listed on a criminal database somewhere, especially where serious sexual and/or assault cases are concerned. If not, why not? I understand this would necessitate increased application time and fees, but if it saves a few ladies from being turned into crucified cannon fodder from abusive, deranged screwballs, wouldn't it be worth it? 

 

Does Chinalovematch.net or any other introduction agency out there, bear any ethical or legal responsibility  - or any obligation whatsoever -  for the outcome in the short term of their matches?  I agree that should a lady be brutalised say, several years after the introduction, that sufficient time has passed by to negate any direct connection to the dating site. But what if the lady was bashed within days or just a few weeks after the introduction? Should the dating site concerned be coerced into giving an ex gratia payment to the lady, as partial compensation for her ordeal, assuming she's still alive or not permanently comatose in a hospital bed somewhere?

 

The major immediate knee-jerk counter argument against this plan that would of course be made by the agencies would be the costs, time and trouble involved. How predictable. No surprises here. So if a violent male psychotic terrorises a lady who was recently introduced to her through a dating site, without any background checking at all, the site managements will simply shrug their shoulders and say, “Sorry… all care but no responsibility” or even more cynically, "Sorry... shit happens!".

 

Lucidity and normality in so many is controlled by no more than a quivering hair trigger within the mind, where sanity in the blink of an eye can frightfully transform into a God forsaken psychosis. I know, I've been there myself, at least to some degree. Thankfully I was never violent, but not so for many other aberrant nut jobs lurking out there, when all control is lost.

 

Statistics problematically attest to the fact that about one in four men have at least intermittent trouble in controlling their wrath. You know who you are, you who possess these disturbing traits. You know also that these tendencies, these awful predilections, need to be controlled. Having done this, your lives will then be improved, as will the lives of those hapless folk around you. But let's look a little deeper.

 

Studies advise that just for starters, psychopaths make up about one percent of the general population and as much as twenty-five percent of male offenders in federal correctional settings. These conscienceless deviants are typically profoundly selfish and lack genuine empathy and remorse, even though they usually calculatingly feign that they possess these qualities, that helps make them even more menacing. The  combined population of say, Australia, Canada and the USA is heading towards 400 million. So just looking at psychopaths by themselves, let alone all the other classes of sociopathic weirdos out there, four million of them exist! This alarming figure may not frighten everyone, but it sure as hell worries me. Should it also concern the management of dating sites?

 

Please note the questions asked above are intended as rhetorical. I don't particularly need nor expect specific answers to them, especially from the management of this website, who I regard very highly. They're raised as something for the wider global community to hopefully reflect upon. It's only through the inaction or apathy of good people that evil can flourish, after all. By posing vexed dilemmas like these that others are either too complacent, too ignorant or too afraid to ask, proactive discussions and possible solutions can potentially be found. Or at the very least, general awareness and concern for the compelling issues are raised.

 

My final somewhat disparate yet hopefully ascendant and empowering words on this topic are as follows:

 

"In any situation, err on the side of kindness."

 

Thank you for your attention.

 

 

Copyright owned jointly by Author and CyberCupid Co., Ltd. Breach of copyright will be prosecuted.
Comments
(Showing 1 to 10 of 179) 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 More... Last
#2018-06-24 14:19:54 by JohnAbbot @JohnAbbot

Barry, Barry, Barry... I am deeply concerned that you may be slipping over to the dark side, by which I mean the far left. You know, those people who have come to believe that everything should be free, that no one needs to take responsibility for themselves and that anyone uttering a word or that doesn't jibe with their own beliefs is thereby insulting them and should be incarcerated for hate speech.

I say this because the questions you pose seem to suggest that anyone who plays any role, no matter how innocent, should be held responsible for someone falling prey to harm done to them by the wrongdoing of some other person. 

First, I really want to point out that you have referred to CLM as being a "dating agency" in one place and an 'introduction agency" in another, both of which descriptions are quite incorrect. We do not act as an agency in any sense of the word, nor do we introduce people to each other in any manner. CLM provides a platform on which people can establish a presence of their own and begin to introduce themselves to other people whom they feel they would like to get to know better.  But they introduce themselves, and we play no part in them doing so.

If we were to be held liable for someone meeting a bad person and falling victim to his/her bad actions, then so would all the other platforms out there where people come together and meet other people who they encounter in or on the platform and decide they might be interested in getting to know that person better. This would mean that churches, schools, colleges, work places of every kind, the military forces, resorts, cruise ships, ski hills, clubs, restaurants and certainly bars and nightclubs would be potentially liable for having allowed someone for having met a bad person in or on their platform.   

Social networks like Facebook would be liable for countless meetings in which one member came to be hurt in some way by meeting another.  Google would surely have to take some of the blame. After all, how many people find the platforms mentioned above through a Google search.  Obviously that makes Google an agent of some kind in the ultimate meeting of millions of potantial victims.

So too would each and every friend who introduced one friend to another would have to shoulder the responsibility for and harm coming to one friend at the hands of another. 

The only people who would not be responsible, apparently, would be the victims themselves. After all, why should we expect them to exercise caution and common sense in their dealings with people they meet when it is everyone else's fault that they met. Everyone is responsible for the actions of all the others in their lives, but nobody is responsible for their own actions.

That's where it seems the very asking fo your questions is leading, and, sadly, it also seems to be the direction the world is heading. How pathetic we are becoming.

#2018-06-24 16:24:11 by Barry1 @Barry1


@JohnAbbot

 

Thanks for your comments, John.

 

At least in both Australia and Canada, there are no outrageous lawsuits where in some cases, obscene amounts of damages are awarded to plaintiffs. One recent case in the news here was a drunken Aussie footballer visiting New York who bashed a couple of people with his fists.  Nothing terribly serious, no one needed to go to hospital.  But the footballer was ordered to pay over ONE MILLION dollars in damages to the family that he assaulted. Had a similar judgement occurred in Australia, the amount needing to be paid would've been closer to around five thousand dollars. Vive la difference.

 

Anyway, my article was hopefully to make people think, is all.  I certainly didn't expect it to achieve anything.  Oh, it did in fact achieve one thing.  I enjoyed writing it, better than watching TV or drinking beer.  (giggle)

#2018-06-25 09:40:06 by YinTingYu @YinTingYu

@ Barry1,..."Nig-gah Pleeze" !!

I don't know how you are getting along these days but it seems like you have currently reached "Dingo Level". Too many walks in the "Outback" ?? Whatever.  :D(d)(dance)

I want you to understand that I aproach you as a "Band Member" now. NO racial discrimination.This is just how band members relate to each other here in Texas (hehe).

My reaction to this (#3) portion of your general blog topic is, "Where in the Living and or Dying HELL" is this good ole son comming from ?? (sweat)

Look man,...even though you take the "erudite approach" I sense I can still understand you. Bro,... when you encountered the "Barry/Lilly/Tina/Wendy Schism", I wrote many paragraphs but, after re-reading, they all just seemed negative. I refrained from posting. A cowboy don't kick another cowboy when he's down. My rule,... "Dog Gonnit"!!!.:D

If you wish to communicate privately, I'm open. John could help a little bit to set it up. John and TLG are very good at this. I place no pressure because I realize we both have immediate concerns that need to be addressed. Just remember, if you choose this option, good fellow, I am a Music Head.  Yep,... dyed in the wool (hehe).

I'm hoping ALL is now cool. Offering a hand if needed.

Hey,..I want to send you a music video,...sincere. I really feel you need it

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L5V9nK7-OkM

"Green River". Dig it Brother,...dig.

Take care "Ole Son". Peace and Blessings,

Gongji

#2018-06-25 11:57:43 by melcyan @melcyan

@JohnAbbot

I am pleased to hear that you condemn the extremes of left-wing politics. I think it probably goes without saying that you also condemn the extremes of right-wing politics. I am interested to know the name of at least one person on the left of American politics past or present who you fully respect. To help you, I will give an example. I will give you the name of someone from the right of American politics who I fully respect - Dwight Eisenhower.

#2018-06-25 12:34:58 by YinTingYu @YinTingYu

@ Barry1

Man,...I am slightly confused with this blog entry. I may not have it straight. If you really are saying that there may be some third party responsible for any miss-givings that may happen between to consenting adults that are just trying to find each other and develop some future potential then, you Brother, are certainly out of bounds.

It's cool with me that you express but really, if you do this, just know,...you are on the "Fast Track" to becomming the featured D.J. at a little club known as "Chez Nowhere" !!

Dig ??

Out.

Gongji

#2018-06-25 15:41:53 by Barry1 @Barry1


@YinTingYu

 

I don't know how you are getting along these days but it seems like you have currently reached "Dingo Level". Too many walks in the "Outback" ?? Whatever. 

 

Hello Gongji. 

You're the first person who has ever intimated I've reached "dingo level". Many may take this the wrong way, but I'll take it as a compliment, thank you, Sir. Dingos are respected here as a traditional, hard working and very smart animal.

 

I want you to understand that I aproach you as a "Band Member" now. NO racial discrimination.This is just how band members relate to each other here in Texas (hehe).

 

I'm honoured to be classed now as a member of your fraternity, your band, Gongji.

 

 

My reaction to this (#3) portion of your general blog topic is, "Where in the Living and or Dying HELL" is this good ole son comming from ??

 

I'm coming from the position of Truth and Righteousness, my friend. Some would say fairness and reasonableness.

 

Look man,...even though you take the "erudite approach" I sense I can still understand you. Bro,... when you encountered the "Barry/Lilly/Tina/Wendy Schism", I wrote many paragraphs but, after re-reading, they all just seemed negative. I refrained from posting. A cowboy don't kick another cowboy when he's down. My rule,... "Dog Gonnit"!!!.

 

You're a good man, Gongji.  I was under severe verbal harassment at times a little earlier in my blog career here. Being attacked and vilified from all sides. But when the going gets tough, only the meek hide.  Thank you however, for not contributing to the overwhelming chorus of discontent I was receiving at that torrid time.

 

If you wish to communicate privately, I'm open. John could help a little bit to set it up. John and TLG are very good at this. I place no pressure because I realize we both have immediate concerns that need to be addressed. Just remember, if you choose this option, good fellow, I am a Music Head.  Yep,... dyed in the wool (hehe).

I'm hoping ALL is now cool. Offering a hand if needed.

 

Thanks Gongji but I'm a little confused.  Why do you think I need help, even from someone as smart as you no doubt are? Earlier in my life I did indeed suffer from intermittent bouts of inappropriate bad temper, but I'm fine now, mate. True, I'm still single...  but am convinced this won't be forever!

 

Unless you think that because some of my articles - and confronting images within them - are rather bizarre and possibly reflective of a deeply disturbed person? In which case, I sincerely appreciate your concerns and must ask if anyone else here thinks the same as you in this area?

 

To digress, congratulations must go to you, for the glowing success you've nobly achieved in the field and artistry of fine, quality music.

 

Hey,..I want to send you a music video,...sincere. I really feel you need it

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L5V9nK7-OkM

"Green River". Dig it Brother,...dig.

 

Hey, I've always liked Creedence Clearwater Revival. Their 1970 album, "Cosmo's Factory" was just so cool!  John Fogerty (born 1945) has such a distinctive, masterful voice!

In return, may I offer a chill piece of music that I enjoy, when in the mood for something soft and meditative. Only listen to it though, when you're not in a hurry.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yibXZNouLtA

 

Take care "Ole Son". Peace and Blessings,

 

Blessings to you also, Gongji.  (handshake)(handshake)

#2018-06-25 15:51:43 by Barry1 @Barry1


@YinTingYu

 

"if you do this, just know,...you are on the "Fast Track" to becoming the featured D.J. at a little club known as "Chez Nowhere""

 

Well, I wrote this article knowing it would achieve nothing. I did however, hope that it would make people think just a little on the issues raised.

 

There are a lot of weirdos and nutters out there. I just hope that no sweet Chinese lady on this website ever has the misfortune to meet any of them.

 

I note also that since one per cent of the population are bona fide clinical  psychopaths, this includes WOMEN as well.

 

Let's put the shoe on the other foot.  What would happen if a nice Western guy happens to meet a crazed female psychopath here, who disguises her psychosis well?  Remember these sociopaths are very cunning, intelligent  - and without empathy or conscience.

 

What would the future hold for such a potentially malevolent pairing?  :^)

 

 

#2018-06-25 22:15:34 by melcyan @melcyan

Anyone who joins an online dating sites needs to understand that most of your contacts are wrong for you. If you are not prepared to put in the necessary effort to recognize the people who are wrong for you then you really should not be on a dating site at all.

 

Most violent men suffer from low self-esteem and are weak on empathy. So if a woman checks a man for genuine self-esteem and genuine empathy (with friends, family and towards herself) then she has completed an important first step towards protecting herself.

#2018-06-25 22:31:22 by paulfox1 @paulfox1

@all

You may wonder where these traits come from. Please allow me to tell you. Quite frankly, I don't care whether you believe me or not. You are free to do your own research. During the last 18 months or so, I have done over 4000 of research into this, so I have a pretty good idea as to what I'm talking about......

1. Vaccines

2. Mercury tooth fillings

3. Fluoridation of our drinking water and toothpaste

4. GMO (Monsanto) food

5 Television

6. Holly Wood

7. NASA

 

Now, you may think I'm a tin-foil-hat wearing 'conspiracy theorist' - but you're SUPPOSED to think that. (The term 'conspiracy theorist' was coined by the CIA in 1967. It was designed to 'outlaw' anyone who disagreed with the official narrative).

Therefore, if you DON'T beLIEve that 9/11 was carried out by a man-in-a-cave on a dialysis machine, 10,000 miles away, with no phone signal, and whose 'frends' couldn't drive a car through a tunnel let alone fly a plane at 5ft above the ground while crashing into the Pentagon office that housed all the evidence of a 2.4 TRILLION dollar loss - you are a 'conspiracy theorist'.

Is it POSSIBLE to beLIEve that 256 passengers all PAID CASH on the MORNING of 9/11, and that NO CARS were found abandoned in the car park?

I digress..................

The problem with Barry's anger is that it's man-made. It's deliberate!

I hate you / you hate me.....because we're easier to control.

John hates me talking about this stuff, but unless we ALL come together, the powers that SHOULDN'T be are going to win over people like Barry who has no NEED to be angry, yet doesn't know why he is. Just saying.................

 

 

 

 

#2018-06-26 13:07:40 by Barry1 @Barry1


@melcyan

 

"if a woman checks a man for genuine self-esteem and genuine empathy (with friends, family and towards herself) then she has completed an important first step towards protecting herself."

 

I encourage MEN to also check the woman also.  Pychosis is not gender specific unfortunately. There are a lot of female nutters out there also!

Good comments, Melcyan.  (y)

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