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Barry from Australia is a questioning soul who looks at social issues from an alternative point of view and instead of asking, “Why?”, he asks “Why not?” He’s convinced that many of his previous incarnations were spent in China. He feels drawn to the people there; attracted by their rich culture and way of life. If given one wish from God, he’d reply, “I want everyone on Earth to be the same colour, speak the same language, and treat each other as they themselves would like to be treated.”
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Dark Shadow of My Life (Part 2)

By Barry Pittman
617 Views | 26 Comments | 6/9/2018 10:48:16 AM

"Deceptive and deceiving, the human mind

feigns forgiveness and outward love

Maleficence reigning supreme inside

humanity condemned, woe betide"



As previously discussed in Part 1 of this blog, for about ten years or so, I'd been cursed with spasmodic attacks of inappropriate bad temper. This used to annoy the hell out of me after they'd subsided, not to mention of course, the poor suffering souls I'd been berating!  But unexpectedly one day, a plausible explanation for the belligerent behaviour I’d been afflicted with for so long finally manifested. Halelujah! This then paved the way for effective treatment. I felt at once both enormously relieved yet very disheartened by what I'd been through for the preceding few years. I wonder to this day, how many people - men in particular - have like me, confoundedly suffered through bouts of extreme irritability, the "Doctor Jekyll and Mr Hyde" syndrome. My Hyde being quite an unpleasant fellow indeed. My guess is millions. So the story about this temper syndome continues…



I was listening one day to talkback radio. An anger management expert was talking, naturally I took a keen interest. A caller then rang up and was put on air.  His narrative went like this:



"Every now and then, my personality changes. One moment, I'm completely fine, then suddenly over the next few seconds, a wave of anger washes over me. I can feel this happening quite clearly, like the tide suddenly rolling in."



Bingo!  This was pretty similar to the curse I'd been suffering with. Abrubtly stopping what I was doing, I listened ever more closely to the advice from the psychologist to the caller. He explained that a percentage of people experienced anger problems caused by hormones. The "wave of anger washing over me" was apparently related to the inflated release of neurochemicals from the HYPOTHALAMUS that in turn stimulated the PITUITARY GLAND to suddenly release excessive levels of aggression-fueling biochemicals. This then dictated one's behaviour, typically including bouts of anger, anxiety and/or depression.



In men, aggression was related to an upsurge in testosterone and the left hemisphere of the brain suddenly became more stimulated. Over time, these recurring patterns of behaviour were often also associated with other symptoms such as weight gain or weight loss, fatigue, insomnia, depression and/or low libido.  To augment the inappropriate bouts of anger that often seemed to materialise from out of nowhere, akin to a ghost mysteriously manifesting, only to enigmatically disappear a few minutes later.



The expert recounted that many of these symptoms occurred to men (and women) who were experiencing andropause (or menopuase in ladies).  He added further vital information. Let me paraphrase as follows.



"Irritable male syndrome (IMS), also known colloquially as Grumpy Old Man syndrome, is a recognised condition associated with symptoms such as hypersensitivity, anxiety, frustration and anger. This is directly related to biochemical changes and hormonal fluctuations within the body at any given time and in some older men, the symptoms often become more pronounced, though these fluctuations also occurred in some younger individuals as well. The exact cause or reason for these changes are still under investigation although some theories do exist."



At last I'd found a plausible, scientific explanation for my strange bursts of irrational irritibility. Hormonal and biochemical changes, most likely related to andropause. My age now is 63, thank heaven I've passed through the emotional volatility and turbulence I'd experienced in my fifties. Though I still get occasional bouts of anger, these fall into the realm of being appropriate and within reason, as opposed to inappropriate and over-the-top.



But this knowledge painfully came too late for me. The crippling consequences of my past mood swings had been severe. As previously described, one broken marriage for starters. Sure, other facters were no doubt involved in the divorce, but my intermittently sour disposition most certainly hadn't done me any favours. Au contraire. Plus a bunch of hapless victims existed who I'd rudely clashed with over this period, including some erstwhile good friends, some of whom were friends no more due to my unsavory surliness. No surprises here. You reap what you sow.



The execrable bed of nails created by my behaviour, I had been involuntarily forced to lie upon, time after time. The fact that often I had no strong control over my surliness was irrelevant. How could I in all seriousness say to a good friend that I'd just rudely bawled at, "Sorry mate, my hormones are in high fluctuation today". 



Equally alarming though is the grim fact that as described, I was far from being alone. How many wives for example, have been brutalised by men with anger management issues? Domestic violence is escalating year upon year, immune to every attempt made to reduce it. The courts are overwhelmed by ballooning applications for AVOs (apprehended violence orders) and DVOs (domestic violence orders).



In similar fashion, road rage and other aberrant bouts of violence are mushrooming. Why? What's causing this highly combustible emotion, this surging undercurrent of dangerous discontent? As illustrated multiple times on the TV news showing angry people who appear to lose all degree of sanity.



In Australia recently, in yet another road rage incident, a motorist brandished a snarling chainsaw and started running up the street with it, akin to a scene straight out of the "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" horror movie! If it wasn't symptomatic of a serious societal problem, it'd be laughable!



"Ha, ha, ha - look at this fruitcake chasing the other dude up the street with a roaring chainsaw!"



How many murders or other serious crimes have been committed by men who have suddenly snapped into a few crazed seconds of madness? How many firearm triggers have been pulled in fleeting fits of explosive lunacy, to cause actions that then will be regretted in a subsequent lifetime of guilt and overpowering culpability?



What the hell's going on here? 



Let's take a closer look at some disturbing facts:



A major investigation into anger issues in Britain by the Mental Health Organisation revealed some key findings as follows:



• GPs reported that they had few options for helping patients who came to them with problem anger.



• Almost a third of people polled (32%) said they had a close friend or family member who had trouble controlling their anger.



• More than one in ten (12%) admitted that they had trouble controlling their own anger.



• More than one in four people (28%) said that they worried about how angry they sometimes felt.



• One in five people (20%) said that they have ended a relationship or friendship with someone prematurely because of how they behaved when they were angry.



• 64% either strongly agreed or agreed that people in general were getting angrier.



• Fewer than one in seven (13%) of those people who said they had trouble controlling their anger, had sought help for their anger problems.



• 58% didn't know where to seek help from, if they desired proactive treatment for an anger problem.



These statistics are downright frightening. Chilling. But this is only one segment of the story. Please stay alert for the next chapter in this special report on anger, where shamefully at one stage I myself formed part of an alarming group of excessively bad tempered individuals. Perhaps I should start a new Facebook group called "Psychotics Anonymous" or "Nutcases in Nirvana"?



In Part 3 of this series, we'll thus conclude by finally tying everything together with important questions such as how all this potentially affects dating sites such as Chinalovematch.net. Once again, thank you for your attention.



(To be continued)


Copyright owned jointly by Author and CyberCupid Co., Ltd. Breach of copyright will be prosecuted.
Comments
(Showing 1 to 10 of 26) 1 2 3 More...
#2018-06-09 10:47:32 by JohnAbbot @JohnAbbot

Barry, the immediate question that comes to me is this. Before accidentally, and fortunately, overhearing a discussion on your car radio that related to your issue, and led you to the solution, did you not ever consider seeing a psychologist yourself, or did you not try doing your own research on the problem?

People have been self diagnosing on the internet for over a decade now. Did you do any googling to see what you might discover?

These questions are not meant as criticism. Lots of people, including myself, will tolerate all kinds of health issues for years before finally succumbing and seeking proefessional help, while other people will rush off to an MD or other professional the moment they have a hiccup.

As I say, I would likely have done exactly what you did, but I would like to know, in hindsight, how you feel about the fact that your problem might have been resolved much earlier if you'd been a little more proactive. What say you? 

#2018-06-09 17:05:12 by Barry1 @Barry1


@JohnAbbot

 

"I would like to know, in hindsight, how you feel about the fact that your problem might have been resolved much earlier if you'd been a little more proactive."

 

Three reasons existed why I didn't seek professional help.

 

1. It happened very infrequently, about once per month.  It was far from being a chronic, continuing problem. So I lived with it.

 

2. I felt embarrassed by the condition and did't feel comfortable spilling my guts out to some overpaid stranger, regardless of whether he was a professional or not.  I didn't also know what type of professional to see about the intermittent condition?

 

3.  I inherently sensed the problem would pass, as fundamentally I knew I wasn't a violent or explosive person. I figured the problem would sooner or later evaporate, which it did.  It just took a lot longer than I'd anticipated however.

#2018-06-11 13:41:45 by Barry1 @Barry1

@everyone

It's interesting to me that nearly all the recent blogs on this site have been contaminated with many largely irrelevant comments to the particular blog topic that had been written.



Let me boast then that at the time of writing, this is the ONLY recent blog that proudly remains free from such off-topic irrelevancies.

 

One plausible explanation for this amazing phenomenon however, may be that there's a grand total of two comments here (besides this one).  (giggle)



Better to have quality pertinent comments over quantity any day of the week, I say!  Not everyone is particularly interested for example, in whether Michelle Obama really is a he-man in drag or whether the world's food is being covertly altered to reduce global population growth!  (giggle)

 

 

#2018-06-12 09:08:55 by melcyan @melcyan

"Better to have quality pertinent comments over quantity any day of the week" Very wise words, Barry. Hold that thought. Don't ever let that pearl of wisdom escape your grasp.

#2018-06-12 15:44:55 by Barry1 @Barry1


@melcyan

 

""Better to have quality pertinent comments over quantity any day of the week"
 

Are you suggesting Melcyan, that for example, some of Paul Fox's comments where he confidently asserts the Earth is flat and that Michelle Obama is a raving transvestite in drag who should have starred in the "Rocky Horror Picture Show", as he/she is carrying a lot of obvious, wobbling, bouncing "junk", are not in fact high quality, profoundly informative comments?  :^)

#2018-06-13 02:53:21 by anonymous17379 @anonymous17379

Barry, I remember talking with my grandad many years ago, he told me alot of men and women get "grumpy" in their older years because the youth they once had was just a memory and many older men and women struggle with that. I have not seen or witnessed men women in their 70/80 with these full on anger outbursts, doesn't mean they don't happen I just have not seen them personally. 

Like I said in your last entry I have mainly seen women(30-60) completely lose it especially Chinese women.

I have noticed alot more younger women snapping in public, going on insane rants, especially in the USA and Canada, thanks social media.

I have often thought that anger comes from loss of youth, the knowledge that we are mortal and eventually will get old, feeble and die. Possibly feeling that we have failed in our lives, not being as successful as we think ought to have been or not lived as wild, carefree and adventurous when we were younger and now rueing that loss. 

Personally I want to stay healthy, in good shape physically and mentally till the day I croak! One thing I have tried to do is keep my testosterone levels up where they should be. It has helped considerably in my daily health and daily moods.

Very good blog!

bring on part 3

 

#2018-06-13 13:15:29 by anonymous17380 @anonymous17380


@Barry1

"Not everyone is particularly interested for example, in whether Michelle Obama really is a he-man in drag or whether the world's food is being covertly altered to reduce global population growth!"

Well, they SHOULD be !

#2018-06-13 16:05:50 by Barry1 @Barry1


@anonymous17379

 

" I remember talking with my grandad many years ago, he told me alot of men and women get "grumpy" in their older years because the youth they once had was just a memory..."

 

This is a theory I've never heard before, Anon17379.  I wonder though what's the point of becoming bad tempered, simply because you've not achieved as much as you set out to do in life?  It seems very much akin to shooting yourself in the foot...  because a bad tempered person is generally not a happy one.

 

"I have mainly seen women(30-60) completely lose it especially Chinese women."

 

I know many Chinese talk very loudly when in the street, this seems almost to be part of their culture. Though I've not really noticed Chinese ladies in particular lose their cool, except when they are cajoling a shopkeeper or merchant who they think has ripped them off!

 

"One thing I have tried to do is keep my testosterone levels up where they should be. It has helped considerably"

 

I know weight lifters and others sometimes take anabolic steroids in order to increase muscle mass. Natural testosterone boosters are available also, being a class of herbal supplements aimed at naturally increasing your testosterone levels. Products such as D-aspartic acid; zinc; magnesium; fenugreek are often promoted as being testosterone elevating, although often they work only in men with low levels to start off with, as compared to men with normal baseline levels.

 

But as men age, our testosterone levels and libido typically decrease.  Anything that can help this is a good thing.

 

I remember @paulfox1 at one stage was enthusiastic about the benefits of tongkat ali, that has been proven to heighten men's libido. The problem with this though is that it's a little expensive and some forms of it are not as potent as others, so one needs to know for sure that your tongkat merchant is supplying you the good stuff, not the cheaper, less effective variety.

 

One CLM reader here a couple of years ago swore by the efficicy of direct testosterone injections. But I believe these generally are frowned upon by the medical profession, so one needs to find a doctor who disagrees with this point of view, as this reader had done. He seemed quite happy with the results.

 

For the benefit of all the ageing men here Anon17379, what methods do you recommend for maintaining an enviable testosterone level?

#2018-06-13 16:08:04 by Barry1 @Barry1


@anonymous17380

 

"Well, they SHOULD be !"

 

Thanks for the comment, Anon17380.  Gosh, you sound exactly like @paulfox1. 



In any case, whoever you are, your strident comment is appreciated, thank you.

#2018-06-13 19:26:10 by melcyan @melcyan

Barry, your question lets me know that the pearl has slipped from your grasp. Easy come easy go.

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