Fact: Many foreign men prefer Asian women as partners because of their looks

Fact: Many Asian women prefer foreign men as partners because of the good life they can give them.

Fact: Everyone has their standards and preferences when choosing a mate, but this does not rule out the possibility of love.

Many foreign men do have honest intentions of finding love and marrying an Asian woman; and there are times when they are confronted by the possibility that an Asian woman they are dating may only want to be with them to get a visa and live abroad. For many Asian women, having a foreign visa does present many great opportunities. But not all of them are only after a foreign visa.

Many Asian women also have honest intentions of finding love and marrying a foreign man; and they are aware that how they look is often a huge factor why foreign men want them as a mate. Many foreign men do find the delicate features of the women of Asia very appealing, indeed. But this does not mean that their attraction is only an Asian fetish.

The fact is, no matter where we come from and regardless of our cultural background, we all have personal preferences and standards by which we choose our ideal mate. At the same time, we also want to find love and to have an ideal marriage.

Sure, there are those with selfish motivations for wanting to marry someone; those whose choice of a partner are self-serving. There are those who do not care about love at all, as long as their selfish needs are satisfied.

It is also true, however, that our expectations and desires with regards to finding a mate and marriage are self-serving to a certain degree. We have needs that we need our partner need to be able to satisfy; this is true in any relationship. But the presence of love always makes a big difference.

For many of us, love doesn’t just happen; certain conditions have to come together so that the seed of love can be planted and can bloom.

It can be said that love follows or grows when we meet someone who fits our idea of what an “ideal” partner should be. Oftentimes, we initially become attracted to someone who has the physical features we like or traits we admire; later on, stronger feelings develop and deeper connections are formed after we get to know them better and realize how much we have in common with them and/or discover more admirable traits they possess.

Other times, no initial physical attraction occurs, but stronger feelings still develop after getting to know each other better, especially after we realize that that person can satisfy many of our needs and desires.

Many (well-intentioned) foreign men who find Asian women physically captivating also admire them for other non-superficial characteristics they possess, which these foreign men believe make them very ideal life mates. In short, Asian women fit their personally-defined “criteria” of what an ideal partner/wife should be. Being with their ideal woman often means being in an ideal relationship/marriage, where mutual needs are satisfied and where love and happiness are also present.

Many (well-intentioned) Asian women who find foreign men attractive because of the opportunity for a better life they represent also admire them for other non-material “benefits” they can offer, especially as lifetime partners. Foreign men also fit their personally-defined mold of what an ideal partner/husband should be. Being with their ideal man also means having their needs satisfied, creating an environment that is also ideal for love to blossom.

Many relationships become mutually beneficial because two people love each other. Sometimes, it’s the other way around – two people learn to love each other because they satisfy each other’s needs. For the latter to happen, two people must give themselves the opportunity to know each other on a deeper level; they must not be too quick to judge and reject each other based on their individual definitions of what an ideal mate is. Otherwise, they might miss out on a real chance at finding real love.

While each of us has our personal preferences and standards when choosing a mate, these preferences and standards are not always absolute, nor are they always black and white, whether we realize it or not. Most of the time, they are just starting points or guidelines or general ideas. Following this line of reasoning, if a foreign man finds out that one of the expectations of a woman he’s interested in is to acquire a visa, he should not be too quick to jump to the conclusion that that is all the woman is after. An Asian woman must also realize that not all foreign men who are attracted to Asian women only have an Asian fetish or are superficial.

In the real world, relationships are rarely like the happily-ever-after ones in fairy tales. Of course, romance can still be had, and the elements of hope and faith should still be present. At the same time and especially when it comes to cross-cultural relationships, there are certain realities that require a pragmatic attitude and approach. And then, the romance, the hoping, and the taking a leap of faith can follow. And love will blossom where it may.