Chinese Women, Asian Women, Online Dating & Things Chinese and Asian
Born in the UK but now living in Australia, Paul Fox has travelled to many places throughout China. He has seen the lighter side, the darker side, both the gentle and the seedy sides. He documents his experiences and is willing to share them with anyone who wants to listen. He is not afraid to say things exactly how he sees them, and is quite happy to "name and shame" when necessary.
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Chinese Women: Is She My Type – Introduction – Slip Carefully    

By Paul Fox
8589 Views | 35 Comments | 10/31/2013 1:14:37 PM

China – The land of dragons! – With more than 5000 years of culture, tradition and heritage – What on earth are us western guys doing here looking for a Chinese woman???? What is the attraction?

No doubt you have your own reasons – but when you walk through the streets of London, San Francisco, New York and see the 50-year-old “chick” and think “Wow, I’ll have some of that !” - Why would you want an Asian woman of a similar age?

Welcome to my Blog – over the next few weeks we are going to be exploring Chinese women like never before – what they do, what they want – and more importantly – get inside their head a little.

You will be reading my OPINION about Chinese women – essentially the 5 main categories of women of China. You will learn a tried-and-tested method of recognising what TYPE of women you are likely to meet when you go to China and what type of woman you are chatting to on this web-site.

OK, so what makes me the “expert”?

My first trip was in 2009 – I travel there monthly (and have even been known to go weekly) – I have been more than 40 times – I have many many friends there – I have been studying Chinese for more than 5 years – and I LIKE IT!

I like the culture, the traditions, the language and I just love “people-watching”.

Sit outside a coffee shop and sip a latte while you watch the people go by – Fascinating.

You know what I love most? – Ha ha – Its the “Chinglish”.... The terrible translation errors and spelling or grammar mistakes! “Cock-ups’ that range in size from a small spelling mistake on a restaurant menu to huge billboards and illuminated signs – and there are plenty to see.

For example, in Chong Qing recently I saw a big illuminated sign saying – “CAR PRAK” ! and then below it, an arrow with the words – “CAR PRAKING” – Love it!

My favourite so far has to be the picture here – taken outside the restrooms in a lovely big restaurant in Shenzhen.

But joking aside, although I love to visit China, I am not certain that it is a country in which I would want to live full-time. Too many people, too many cars, too much pollution, to name but a few reasons – yet it remains a fascinating place.

Did you know for instance that China has around 1600 different dialects? YES, 1600! And many of them are mutually un-intelligible.

Cities are huge, bustling places with population numbers that will amaze you. For example, the city of Shenzhen (across the border from Hong Kong) with a population of approximately 22 million people – Roughly the same amount of people as in the WHOLE OF AUSTRALIA!

Most people head for the city for work, but many originally hail from the countryside where families are traditionally poor.

A friend of mine recalled her parents being so poor when she was growing up that at the age of 14 her mother beat her because she lost the equivalent of 5 cents on her way home from school.

They say that Chinese people will eat “anything with legs, except a table” – and it’s true - No part of the animal is “wasted” and even in fine dining restaurants you can order such “delicacies” as lung and intestine.

Fish heads is another ‘delight’ – haha, not for me I’m afraid, but I am always amused to see a chicken or duck dish appear on the table with the head also on the plate.

I remember being out for dinner with a group of friends one night. We ordered some crispy chicken and when it arrived, randomly chopped up into bite-sized pieces, my friend’s Chinese girlfriend dived straight in and grabbed the chickens head! After prizing apart the skull with a chopstick she began to eat the contents. Watching her made me feel quite uneasy and I remember thinking to myself – Thank God she’s not my girlfriend and I don’t have to kiss her tonight ! Ugh !!!! She actually said that she believed eating the chickens brains would give her “more brains” – obviously its not working, dear!

So with alien cultures, traditions, strange eating habits and a language that is so difficult for a foreigner to learn – what IS the attraction? Or are the things I just mentioned THE attraction ?

Its a question I have been asked many many times, yet I still do not know how to give a definitive answer.

One thing that I really DO respect is the respect that many Chinese people have for each other – and especially their parents. It is extremely common for China women in their 40’s and 50’s to still obey their parents wishes and commands. A good friend of mine was with his girlfriend for 5 years and they loved each other very much. They wanted to marry but her father would not allow it – so she had no choice but to end their relationship – could you see THAT happening in the west ?

Get on a bus or the underground (Metro) and you will see young teenagers stand up and offer their seat to an elderly person – something many of us USED to do and see when we were kids but we seldom see this kind of “respect” any longer.

Although we will be discussing 5 different types of Chinese women, all of them will have many things in common. How often do you see a lady’s profile introduction beginning with “I am a traditional Chinese woman....”? The key word being “traditional”. Traditions and cultures are core values of many Chinese people. Sadly, most of our western traditions and cultures have long gone – eroded away over the years to make way for “multi-culturalism” – something that has not happened in China like is has in western countries.

How many “traditions” does the west have left these days? – Christmas and Thanksgiving are excuses to stuff your belly until it’s ready to burst and drink as much alcohol as you can until you fall over – and then of course Easter is just for chocoholics.

But it’s not all good.

Whilst I think it is interesting to have a cross-culture relationship with respect on both sides, there are always the terrible and sad stories that are a result of the same traditions and cultures.

I recently heard a story that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. A woman cleaner was cleaning some public toilets in Shenzhen. In a garbage bin in one of the female toilets she discovered a new-born baby that had been tossed away like rubbish.

Fortunately, the baby was alive and was eventually rescued by a local hospital and apparently survived (happily) – but when I asked the burning question – How could ANY mother do such a terrible thing? – the answer came back quite quickly and seemingly without reservation. Apparently a woman would only do such a thing for one of 2 reasons – either she was not married, or she did not know who the father was. In either case, the poor child would have no ID and as such, life would be very difficult.

As a westerner, I find it so difficult to understand how and why such a thing could happen – yet society, tradition, culture, peer pressure, etc all play their part in the lives of many Chinese people.

Anyway, I digress... back to the series of articles that you will be reading over the coming weeks

As I have said, I will be discussing 5 types/groups/categories (whatever you want to call them) of Chinese women that you are likely to come across in your quest to find your Chinese wife/girlfriend/lover/partner while Chinese dating on

The series of articles is aimed at “newbies’ to the site and people who have little or no experience of Chinese women and culture.

Women reading these articles will know instinctively which category they fall into (but probably won’t openly admit it).

There is much to learn about China women - they are not ALL the same - but I have seen similar "traits" in many that I have met.

For a westerner, going to China is a major trip - time off work, expensive flights and lots of running around to say the least. Therefore (in my opinion) it makes total sense to do as much as is possible during your trip - and if that means meeting more than one woman - so be it.

There are many lovely women in China and if you are a decent and honest man, then you should only need one - however... WHICH ONE????

If you are looking for a life partner, then of course you would need to choose carefully. I do not buy the fact that photos and video chats can tell you as much as you need to know in order to make a decision - although I have no doubt that it works for some men.

As previously mentioned, peer pressure is huge in China. Single women are often frowned upon because they are not married. Their parents pressure them into marriage (and babies) - sometimes at whatever cost!

Divorcees in China (especially those with a child) will often find it difficult for another Chinese man to accept them. They know that most western men will happily accept a divorced woman with a child - and as such, there are many out there waiting for you.

So, based on my own experiences, I would like to "categorize" each "type" of woman that I have met.

Next Post – Type A – “The desperate, divorced housewife”

Copyright owned jointly by Author and CyberCupid Co., Ltd. Breach of copyright will be prosecuted.
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#2013-10-31 14:01:44 by Jennifercc42 @Jennifercc42

Hi dear friends,I like your article, It is humorous and have education significance,it shows you are a man with deep thinking. I will look forward to see you more work.
But I need say I'm sorry, I can't reply you too much, because I can only speak English, write in English is difficult to me, once I write, I need to write in Chinese first , then translate to English, so more it will change the original meaning.
But I believe I will follow your blog, because I think it must be can make people refreshing.and Thank you for sharing your thoughts with friends, I wish you good luck in your search!

#2013-10-31 14:42:52 by shirley9183 @shirley9183

Dear Paul, you really write a very profound and attractive article to talk about Chinese woman, culture and tradition depends on your (Foreigner's) eyes and it touched me a lot. Because many western men came to China to work, to study, to spend holiday or leisure time, mostly of them have not studied and researched many things of China very well and correct, they are only floating on the surface of China. But there are some part of foreigners who are much more well-educated, open-minded and observative so that they can know well about China and even indulge into our culture, life way, history, tradition a lot and win our Chinese peoples deeply respect for them. And obvious that you are the one of the foreigners who really win our big respect.

From your this article I had felt your deep feeling and knowledge about China and Chinese women so that I am long for reading your next article and hope you have enjoyable life there and always be happy!

#2013-10-31 14:52:42 by qdphoebe @qdphoebe

i agree with you .it seems that u know chinese tradtion and culture well.

#2013-10-31 15:07:23 by lhui @lhui

“Chinglish” 就不来了,直接汉语吧~~嘿嘿~~

#2013-10-31 21:09:09 by prana @prana

Thank you for sharing!
Hope to see you more wonderful blog posts.

#2013-10-31 21:10:10 by yeranyi @yeranyi

hehe ,you are an " zhong guo tong " . wait for your analizing about 5 types chinese women.

i think China is catching up now for the 30 years that were lost under the war and occupation.... you konw , if the country grows too fast, the pollution always happens ,bad air ,dirty water... it is lucky that the countryside and the small towns are also beautiful as before.

i think I enjoy be a country farm woman , fresh air , blue skye . plant trees,grow flowers. raise animals, bake and cook nice.

what kind of women i am?! haha

#2013-10-31 21:19:30 by yeranyi @yeranyi

yes , huge population. USA has 350 million people.. China has 1.4 billion its almost 5 times more people in china , there will be fewer people in countryside ...

#2013-10-31 22:03:25 by destiny1 @destiny1

Why don't you introduce western men, they have several types, I think you must be more professional.

#2013-10-31 23:51:13 by paulfox1 @paulfox1

Question -

I know Chinese eat anything, but come on.......
I was in a hotel in DongGuan recently and when I went for breakfast I saw a bowl of "Chicken Wings"

I LOVE chicken wings, but in my country the chicken "wing" is cut from the body, close to the chicken breast

These "chicken wings" were literally the wing "tip" - no meat at all !

They were boiled and they were cold

My question is simple -

WHY ???

#2013-10-31 23:56:27 by Barry1 @Barry1

An interesting article, thanks Paul.

I admire the fact that you're studying Chinese - sadly, it seems to be quite a difficult language to learn. When I ask my multilingual Chinese friends here, "What is overall the harder language to know from scratch - Mandarin or English?", all so far have replied "Mandarin".

I'm considering spending a year or two in China but it's this language situation that's holding me back. If one cannot comprehend most of what's going on around you, one must be missing out on a lot of little subtleties and culture, after all.

I also mentioned to one of my lady friends here that I wouldn't mind spending some time in China. Her astonished reply was, "Why? Too much pollution, too much traffic, too many people - better to stay where you are!"

Yet like you, I'm fascinated by the place. A land of such enormous diversity, from drays and wagons in the country to 320 km/hr trains in the big cities.

As for finding a partner, it's quite confusing. So far on this website, I've experienced everything from outright proposals of marriage within the first one or two internet chats, onwards. One from a doctor.

One specialist cosmetic surgeon maing big money here from wealthy clients also kindly offered to give me a free facelift if I'd fly over to see her in Guangzhou. My reply was "Sorry, I think my wrinkles would present too much of a challenge to you!"

Her response, "Oh, no worry - the greater the challenge, the greater the sense of accomplishment!"

This lady also offered me 20,000 yuan per month if I'd come over and be her English tutor. Again, I politely declined.

Where else but China would such things happen to an ordinary person such as me?

Anyway mate, I look forward to your coming series of articles. Great stuff indeed.

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