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Self-proclaimed “American by Birth, Southern by the Grace of God”, a retired USA State Police Lieutenant with broad experience in SE Asia and China, David will focus on Online Obsessions and Real Relationships: Navigating Chinese/Western Cross Cultural Relationships. He'll share his and others experiences in internet dating, social networking and real life dating in China. Typically American, he will bring you the upside and downside of East/West relationships openly and directly. He hopes both genders can gain some useful knowledge from his blog as well as a few laughs.
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Back to the Future- Part 2- Profile Name and Data: Chinese Matchmaking    

By David Lee
2601 Views | 0 Comments | 7/3/2010 1:57:43 AM
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Steven Spielberg presents Back to the Future Part II

What’s in a Profile Name? Selecting an online dating Profile Name should not be so difficult. What seems basic to me seems to be difficult for others. Please, please, please DON’T do the following IF you are serious for a long-term relationship leading to marriage with a Chinese woman or foreign man:

• Use some sexually suggestive names like, Hot4u2Nite, PassionKittySH, StudMuffinUSA, MasterHorsemanLA, etc. It makes you look like a child at best and more like an idiot, sexual predator or a chicken girl which you may in fact be.

If you don’t believe me on this issue, then maybe you’ll believe female Freelance writer Laura Gilbert who has contributed to Health, Maxim and Cosmopolitan. In her post on MSN Dating 7 profile mistakes guys make, she says:

“Profile problem #1: An unappealing username

Most people online are genuinely looking for love, but a name that makes fun of the process (or yourself) sends a very different message. Even if you’re just joking, few self-respecting women will click on the profile of a guy who calls himself “sexyguy4u2nite,” “39goingon20” or “hangover13.” “Many men create a name that totally contradicts the sincerity of their profile,” says Roman Griffen, author of Internet Dating: Tips, Tricks, Tactics. “Women see a username and decide whether they even want to bother looking at your profile from that. A username can make them think, ‘Oh, this guy just wants a roll in the hay’ and move on.”

Female-friendly fix: Pick something that shows some personality, but that can’t be misinterpreted as negative or sleazy. Try combinations that incorporate your first name, your job, one of your better attributes or a hobby: Names like TallTexan, SDSoundboy, and TalkativeRick all tell a little about you without waving a red flag.”

• Use any form of your real name, especially surname or family name. God forbid both!

• Use any form of your birth date. Especially bad if used in conjunction with your family name.

How Important is Profile Data: This is maybe your one chance to “Sell yourself” so to speak, so don’t blow it. You may only have this one short chance to entice someone to respond to your message, send you a message or respond to your chat request after reading your profile. If you’re NOT a criminal, spammer, Gigolo or Gold digger, here’s the Do’s and Don’ts:

• Be HONEST. Don’t be misleading, lie or hide the fact you have children or the actual number of children. Give your REAL age, height/weight, marital status, where you actually live, what you like to do, where you want to live, etc. More detail on this later.

• Think seriously about your true relocation status. If for example you are obligated to stay in one location for business, job, family, etc., then don’t say you are willing to relocate out of your country or city.

• Complete most, if not all, the basic information and details section about yourself and your relationship goals including ideal partner. This is most important. To simply say “I’m a nice girl” or “I’m a lonely man” or no entries for details section will immediately send up red flags and make you suspect as a potential spammer or con-artist. Do not include any financial information or talk about any personal assets. More on this later.

• Photo(s). Post one or more decent quality photos depending on what your membership status is. CLM has published much on this, but I’ll give you my opinions and suggestions later.

• Post your true location. Like many people, I often search members for a locality like Chengdu for instance. Then after some communication, I learn they actually live in Chongqing, Shenzhen, Shanghai, or some small town in Sichuan Province far from Chengdu. If you move, or change cities, then post the current city you live. It may save you and the other member lots of time.

• Post an acceptable and accurate age range for your potential match. Don’t leave this blank.

Copyright owned jointly by Author and CyberCupid Co., Ltd. Breach of copyright will be prosecuted.
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