Chinese Women, Asian Women, Online Dating & Things Chinese and Asian
Bren is presently married to a Chinese woman after meeting her on CLM. He's a Production Manager/Designer by profession. He enjoys writing on topics of personal experience and observation. From the "meet & greet" to "married life" with an intercontinental relationship, he hopes to create interest and discussion with all of you. Feel free to say, "Hi!" He also welcomes your messages, questions and feedback through CLM (thedragonb1).
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A personal thank you! 谢谢!    

By Bren
2658 Views | 3 Comments | 6/1/2010 10:31:09 PM

Bren Lau showing thanks!

While writing this article, I didn't know it's purpose when I started it; What was this article trying to convey? Sometimes I just sit here let my mind flow and my fingers fly! After a quick pause, it came to me simply. I think I can safely say the whole purpose for this little piece of writing is with no malice or sneering intended, but to say a personal, "Thank You!" 谢谢 to all the Chinese men in China.

What am I thanking them for?
For being unaware of all the beauty that walks past them daily; allowing a few foreign men a possible chance and opportunity of happiness.

I made a comment in a previous post, "One person's trash is another's art." or "What is one's cup of tea is another's cigarette extinguisher." What I'm discovering is men in China feel that certain Chinese women are very average or unattractive to them. If a woman is not the super skinny, long haired tv star/model she is not good enough. Or if she's 29 years old or older she is not considered wife potential?! WHAT?!! Are you crazy? If she's divorced and/or has a child she is not considered viable for marriage. No way?!!! If she's got a little weight on her she is considered fat. Forget about curvy thighs or nice round plump... let me stop! :D I think you get the idea. She's is not a Chinese man's "flavor of the month." Minor characteristics that are more than acceptable and agreeable to American men are not considerable to Chinese men. THANK YOU!!! 谢谢!!!

Maybe Chinese men are just used to pretty Asian women and it's no big deal for them. Or maybe, they see differences in faces that we do not notice or are sensitive to features that are invisible to us foreign men. What Chinese men find glamorous is beyond me. I won't claim to know what they think is a super hot, sexy and beautiful woman. But from what I see on CLM... they have got to be crazy!! I mean, come on, guys!!! Look at them! Surely the ladies photos on CLM aren't just average looking to us right? More and more new photos pop up daily and I see one pretty one after the next. What doe the Chinese men see that I do not? That WE do not see, guys? Anyone agree with me?! If so, then shout it out with me! Let them hear our appreciation:


Thank you 谢谢 for the lovely ladies you don't seem to notice. Really beautiful, hip, chic, stylish and fashionable girls that stop a man dead in his tracks for a second, "WHAT? Whoa!...What?! She's looking for a man?! She's single? No, it couldn't be. She's looking for a man? Looking for a man online?! You mean there is not a queue of men forming at her door waiting for her to come out?"

I swear, I'm beginning to think Chinese men are blind in China. They have some stunning women in their country an letting them slip through their fingers. Now please, with no disrespect, I am not attacking or disrespecting Chinese men at all as I'm sure some Chinese men may find some of our American/European women very attractive while we do not. And it's possible, maybe we are the ones who must be blind. There's 2 sides to the picture... I guess it comes down to the American expression...

"The grass is always greener on the other side."

So I normally ask Chinese women on CLM why are they seeking a foreign man and if they like the Chinese men over there. The responses aren't so favorable. Why they are looking at foreign men today is the exact opposite of why they do not care to bother with Chinese men at the moment.

"He was too possessive and controlling and always jealous."

"He didn't care enough."

"He gambled and smoked, not reliable."

"He cheated on me!" (I hear that a lot)

"Chinese guys all want to be playboys."

"The younger men don't want to settle down."

"They only want to have fun, go to clubs, drink and flirt with all the women."

"They only care for sex."

"They are not serious."

"They do not treat us well."

"They do not take me out to dinner and be loving and gentle with me and treat me as a real girlfriend."

I'm shocked... Wow, can Chinese men be that callous? But I quickly realize and tell them, "It's the same over here in America too. It all depends on who you meet. There are men here who are playboys, selfish, cheaters, liars, and uncaring. It is the same in any country. Chinese women feel foreign men are more respectful to women. And I may have to agree with that comment. We are raised by our mothers who scorn us men if we do not treat a lady respectfully. All men know if you are raised in America you should be nice to a girl. Respect a lady. Be kind to women. Yet there are still some foreign men who don't learn and who are generally assholes; no different than with some Chinese men. So no one is better than the other. It's about meeting the right people and staying clear of the wrong ones.

I can only come to the determination that Asian women are just fed up with being treated any old-way by men in general. They want something new and maybe a foreign man can offer that for them. Maybe we as foreign men here on are looking something new as well and it's not here in our own countries. I hope it's out there and it's better on both ends of whom ever is seeking for a compatible partner. Its everyone's right to seek a good love, no?

Let the search begin!

Thank you...

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(Showing 1 to 3 of 3) 1
#2010-06-02 09:59:46 by kahnsfury @kahnsfury

and thank you Bren for expressing what many members of CLM are thinking.

#2010-06-04 20:47:12 by thedragonb1 @thedragonb1

Ah, don't thank me. ;) Thank CLM!

#2010-06-10 22:00:45 by lan @lan

thank you。i can chat with you wife

(Showing 1 to 3 of 3) 1
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