Chinese Women, Asian Women, Online Dating & Things Chinese and Asian
Bren is presently married to a Chinese woman after meeting her on CLM. He's a Production Manager/Designer by profession. He enjoys writing on topics of personal experience and observation. From the "meet & greet" to "married life" with an intercontinental relationship, he hopes to create interest and discussion with all of you. Feel free to say, "Hi!" He also welcomes your messages, questions and feedback through CLM (thedragonb1).
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3 Words can make your day!    

By Bren
2883 Views | 8 Comments | 6/28/2010 5:28:50 PM

A Baby Crying

Ok, I'm handing over my "man card" for this article. I'm going to delve into my feminine side and express some deeper feelings and insecurities. Some of you guys may cringe reading this. Do not think I haven't been questioning myself if I should even put myself out there for embarrassment and weakening any sort of manliness I have left! I think I just discovered I'm a big-girly-cry-baby! Whaaaaaaaa! :-((

Alright, maybe I am not crying literally, but maybe I'm a bit "whipped" or becoming needy. Maybe I care too much and need to man-up! Maybe I'm getting sentimental in my middle age. It can happen to men as we get older, right? The testosterone levels decline with age and soon you start finding movies that you would never shed a tear at suddenly becomes easy at plucking your heart strings!

Today, I was chatting with my lovely fiance, as I do daily. I discover at the last minute that she is going out to the dance club. She's been partying her butt off lately and it makes sense. She's about to leave China in a few days and fly to America to live with me and begin a married life. So naturally, her friends and family want to share dinners with her and have last minute goodbyes with a bit of partying! Tonight's chat was too brief. Suddenly, very abruptly and without a second's notice:

"I got to go. My cousin is waiting for me."

WHAT?!! :-0 Hello?...Hello?!!! :(
Not the usual, few seconds of loving goodbyes. No, "I love you"! I can't tell you enough how upset I got! My baby just cut me off to go out partying with her cousin with a quick and shallow, "Bye." I never felt so unloved until then. How callous! How can she just cut me off so quickly without taking a few seconds to type the words... "I...Love...You..."? Come on, what's so important for a night at the disco that I'm left hanging with no love?! Are the drinks going to spoil? Is her favorite song going to be missed?! Does she need to rush there so some slobbering drunken guy can try to flirt with her? So what is the rush to not take 10 seconds (not even, five seconds!) to type those three words and give me a bit of encouragement that will make my day?!!

I know-I know, guys. I sound like a cry-baby, right now! Ok, so I am in "bitch-mode." Cool, I can accept it. I'm bitchy enough to tell it to the whole world for your enjoyment. Ha-ha! I am in good company, alongside a famous radio personality in America, Howard Stern. He also has these needy moments on the radio at times when he whines about his fashion model, TV wife, Beth Ostrosky. So, allow me to whine a bit! Maybe it is not a big deal to you! To ME, it somehow is! I have come to the realization that I need to know I am loved every now and then!

Why? Because right now my baby is dressed up looking hot and sexy (no question about it), she's out there in the Guangzhou nightlife at a cool, chic disco club, having fun, enjoying the music, drinking in merriment and I can't be there to enjoy it with her! It SUCKS!..and to make it worse, she didn't tell me she loved me. :(

It all adds up to this: Being told that my woman loves me, can make my day. I feel good when hear it (read it) from my woman. Is there anything wrong with that? With relationships, it's the little things that can mean a whole lot. A little, "I love you" goes a long way. Especially, at a much needed moment like I needed tonight. Yes, I KNOW she loves me. BUT...

"We may know in our hearts that someone LOVES US, but it feels good to hear it from them every now and then, especially when it's needed"

And last night...I needed it.

Copyright owned jointly by Author and CyberCupid Co., Ltd. Breach of copyright will be prosecuted.
(Showing 1 to 8 of 8) 1
#2010-06-28 21:36:50 by JohnAbbot @JohnAbbot

So should we all chip in and buy Bren a tutu? Just kidding Bren, I think it behooves all of us who are in a relationship with someone thousands of miles away to take the extra step necessary to make sure they know they are loved. At least if we want the relationship to last forever.

#2010-06-28 22:18:12 by yujiesky @yujiesky

I always pay attention to your blog, likes to read your article。 you are wonderful!!!I don't think the Bar can produce a good wife! But there can create a good lover。hope you always lucky!!!some worry!

#2010-06-29 08:09:56 by thedragonb1 @thedragonb1

Haaaa! Yes, a bib may have been a better option, John! All is well and much better. She is in New York waiting for her delayed plane to Boston. In 2.5 hours she will be...home. Wow, Ok, now someone give me the STEPS to MARRIAGE LIFE! :D

#2010-06-29 11:33:12 by mina @mina

You are very cute!!! I really feel happy for your financee: 1) only those in a real love relationship can be so sensitive; 2) since you know how it tastes feeling unwanted or unloved, in turn, you know how to treat your beloved one; 3) your willingness for being communicative and expressive will help you guys a lot to overcome any obstacles in relationship.
BTW, I am 100% sure you are loved!

#2010-06-30 05:17:57 by newlydream @newlydream

Don't worry and upset Bren, just let her know what do you need, sometimes you better speak out .

#2010-06-30 23:34:46 by svanslyke @svanslyke

Bren - There is nothing wrong with wanting to hear those words from the woman you love each day. They are very reaffirming to hear. We are approximately the same age and I understand what you are saying. Wishing you all the best in the days to come!

#2010-07-02 23:07:11 by sweetyhhy @sweetyhhy

i hope everthing will go on well as usual. and wish you a sweet life!

#2010-07-04 05:56:21 by thedragonb1 @thedragonb1

Thanks to everyone for your well wishes!!! I must say it's good to begin but a bit surreal. I will share my thoughts very soon! :)


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